do u believe ppl can change?

Question

my cousin just got sent off to reform school.
he decided it was time to get his life in order. he wrote me a letter apoligizing for being a bad role model 4 me, and he promised to come back changed. he explained to me why he quit school and told me im too smart to follow in his footsteps.he said he expects great things for me and when he gets back he'll work a full time job and try to earn back respect he lost from his family. idk if he really will change. he has said this b4! im worried he'll go back 2 hanging out with his old friends and fighting and dipping and doing drugs again....i am really worried about him. do u believe ppl can really change?
thnx♥

also the kids in my family tend to get into drugs and alcohal and smoking real early...like 9th grade...

is there a chance ill be like that?!

imreally sad...and i miss him sooo much and i pray for him EVRY night!!


**cry, sniffle, cry**

Answer 1

yeh. people can change. depending on who they hang out with. And yeh dont follow his footsteps. Also i think you should talk to him about what he is doing.

That happened to my friend. She changed and started smoking and hanging out with the wrong people. And before she met them she was a GOODY TO SHO. I think its the group they hang out with.

Answer 2

I believe that people can change, but I don't think it can happen all of a sudden. Maybe as he's just getting out of reform school he sees all sorts of great things in his future. Sort of like on Sunday night when I think that Monday morning I'm going to start eating healthier, and it just doesn't happen. It's like the best intentions are great, but it's the follow through that counts.

Same in his situation. When he wrote you that letter, he meant that he was going to try to change with all his might. If he falls in with his old crowd there's a chance that he may go back to his old ways...but there's also a chance that he won't.

All you can do is encourage him to keep doing his best. Tell him that no one expects him to be the perfect saint, you all just want him to do the best that he possibly can.

Answer 3

Hi Desiree,
Yes, I believe people can really change..And I don't just mean Bad-to-Good..People also change from Good-to-Bad. That's how fragile our life is..One day you're the nice guy sitting on top of the world, giving, sharing..The next day, your business crumbles and you're out hustling with the others again in a dog-eat-dog mentality...We have also heard stories of how this guy was so-so-bad, then found direction and purpose in life, thus he was able to reform and live a goody-goody life. This I want to say: Your cousin deserves every chance to change..If he's saying it, the better because at least hes aware of his wrongdoings before..Whether he sticks with his promise remains to be seen..But just because he went straight for half a year, then slipped back to the old ways doesn't mean we should sit judgement on him. The fact that he stuck around for 6 months is a testamament to his discipline and commitment..Hey everyone of us slips! Who knows next time, it might be a year, next more than that and so on. There are so many temptations in this world..Everytime he tells you about changing..Believe in him and support him..It's very hard to walk straight without stumbling once in a while. Because how can you expect him to believe in himself if you won't even have faith in him. The only constant thing in life is change..Sometimes from good-to-bad, other times bad-to-good..But the game never ends until you breath your last.

Answer 4

People can change if they have a real desire too.
It will be a challenge for him if he gets back to hangin with the same group of friends.
Don't expect miracles, but be supportive of his decision to want to make that change. Often times when people are in re-hab or places such as that they get remorseful and see the mistakes they have made. If your cousin does not have a replacement for his behaviors he will probably fall back into them, try finding things you can enjoy together that will take him out of his old ways.

Answer 5

I do believe people can change.. I think what he is doing is a great way to start a life in the right direction..
Its great for a person to realize that doing what he was doing isn't getting him anywhere in life and he has the strength and courage to change himself.. I say after that he is a great role model if he stays his new self...

P.s. it does take a lot from a guy to write an emotional letter..

Answer 6

Yes! People definitely can change. in both good and bad ways.
As to repent (get out of bad habits), it takes strong determination and support from people in the surrounding (family is the best). People are born gifted with freedom and determination.

Assure your cousin to hold tight to his decision to live a good life. Keep encouraging him. Power of words is very strong too.

Answer 7

You are the only one who is in control of your own life.
It is your own decisions in life that will shape your life to be what it is in the future. Life will be what you make it for yourself.

It doesn't mean you cannot hang with the crowd, but it makes it a lot harder to be strong when lots of temptation is around you and you are the only one who can remove yourself from it, because it will not be going anywhere!!

I think your cousin did a brave and admirable thing to admit he had gone off track ~ it takes courage to do that, but takes even more courage to prove it through actions, so it is to wait and see if he does clean up his own life.

Life can have some hard challenges to face too, with some people having more than others, but it is never impossible, it takes a lot of inner strength and willpower and being your own best friend, looking after Number One first and not being around people who drag you down and persuade you to be doing things that you know are not good for you all the time.

You need to find good friends and to be around people who lift you up to make you want to be the best you can be in life! That is why change can be so so hard, because it is you who is changing when everyone else is staying the same around you, and they might resent you for doing it, if they do not really have your best interests in their hearts.

It's because they can't see a better way for themselves yet in life either and until they do too, it seems like friendships will end and it's always sad to let go of friends that you have gone through times with which has made you like brothers to each other too. It can be difficult to be strong and stand up to your own friends, worse than standing up to any enemy. But a true brother will respect your decisions to better yourself, regardless of what they chose to do themselves in their own lives.

I wish your cousin well, try not to be too hard on him, because it is up to him to change, and that can be difficult for a lot of people, but you can be there to support him as a friend but that is it. Let him show you that he will change, by keeping his promises to family and doing just that.

Encourage all the good changes he does make and help him build his self-esteem up so he can be strong enough to say no to the old way of life and to keep focused on this new way.
It can be a very scary thing to do, even if he would never admit that to anyone.

He has offered out a letter of making peace so you should take it as that at this stage and just be there for him when he gets out.

Let his life teach you and learn from him so you do not end up in the same lifestyle and do make smarter choices in your own life.

I do believe people can change, but it takes a lot of hard work and actions and not only words to do it.

Peace.

Answer 8

purely be careful, save your eyes and ears open, and if something seems suspicious, distance your self from him. i've got self assurance human beings can replace, and that i even have self assurance there is human beings available who're reliable at making you think of they have replaced. stay vigilant and careful. On an ingredient observe, however, you are able to desire to contemplate whether you will ever be waiting to truly believe this guy or woman after he's injury you so undesirable. specifically situations that is extra useful to stroll away and circulate on.

Answer 9

people change if they want to...thats the key thing "IF THEY WANT TO" same for you dah-ling, if you don't want to do that stuff, then DON'T! Just b/c your ppl did it, doesn't mean u will, you are NOT them. You do what you feel is right, you do what you want to. If you want to do the drugs and such, thats up to you. Your cousin is TRYING to change. That speaks highly of his character! It warms up my heart! Thats so great. He will do his best, taking that step to change is such a big deal, which means he can change...yes. Ppl can change, but it matters wether or not they want to.



ps how do u do that heart thing?! ;P

Answer 10

dont you think so? theres no such thing as permanent in this world, living and non living things change! you change, physically and mentally and others too...mood swings, the way we think, the way we feel, one day you love a person tomorrow when you wke up you realized you dont...