My husband is constantly telling me how much is wrong with him and has something new every other day. He's physically one of the strongest people I know and I know this is all in his head. Nothing I say or do is right - I can agree or disagree and he gets upset. What's the best way to handle someone who believes he is ill and is not?
2007-08-08 03:12:22 · 9 answers · asked by nita5267 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Also, he goes to the Dr and tells them what is wrong with himself. He doesn't like any Dr. he's ever been to and he's over 40. I tell him maybe he should switch doctors, but he doesn't like the next one, either. We've been together 15 years and this part is getting old.
2007-08-08 03:36:22 · update #1
Ignore his behavior. Nod your head silently and go off into dreamland when he starts. I have a close friend who is the same way,and except for that facet of her personality,she is a great person. My theory about hypochondriacs is that they desperately need attention.Maybe if you don't give him any feedback,either verbally or with body language when he begins his litany,he will tire of getting nowhere with you. He can only help himself.If he cannot see that he has a psychological dependence on attention and fear,then you have to steel yourself against it by being non-comittal,but still letting him know you love him. You can't have him committed,so grit your teeth and seriously,go off into dreamland. That's what I do when my friend starts in.Good luck. It must be horrible to live with this.
2007-08-08 03:42:42 · answer #1 · answered by gadzig 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well for one thing don't tell him he's a hypochondriac, that will just hurt his feelings. Have him go to the doctor. You know sometimes there really is something wrong with someone and just because the doctors haven't figured out what it is yet, doesn't mean it's not there or that it's not real. He is the only person that really knows if he is just having anxiety or if there is something really wrong. Suggest to him that he see a therapist to help decipher what is going on in his life. And other than that all you can do is be patient and listen, and try to reassure him the best you can.
2007-08-08 03:23:25 · answer #2 · answered by cuteness 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hard to change someone unless he wants to change.
At the base is the fear that they will actually be sick.
They can also be afraid that a doctor will miss a diagnosis.
This obsession with health might also be looked on as an addiction.
Call AlAnon and see whether they can help you.
They have sessions for people living with people with addictions.
If he is tired of going to medical doctors see if he will go to a therapist or counsellor or suggest marriage counselling as a start.
read my articles at
http://themeaningisyou.com
2007-08-08 03:53:51 · answer #3 · answered by HJG 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-01 21:32:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mother n law is the same way--my husband ignores all her ailments and now she doesn't whine to him so much.
She been tested a thousand times and nothing is wrong with her. She's even gave the family false news trying to get pity--it's pathetic.
Good luck to you.
2007-08-08 12:12:47 · answer #5 · answered by poison_angel32 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i had this once with a family member i told them if they are that sick just harry up and die....
they never really complained again
but i think i agree with some of the others too in ask his Dr what should you do with him
best of luck with this
2007-08-08 04:02:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
i have a brother who is exaclty the same! it usually turns out to be attention seeking... and your husband possibly thinks that if he acts ill you will look after him and pamper him.
i dont know if he possibly has a phobia of becoming ill so as soon as he gets a cough hes sure its lung cancer? i think even suggesting a therapist will freak him out. so just play along with him... maybe speak to your doctor about some placebo tablets.. so when he says he has headaches or whatever you can give him one of them... i dont think you will ever 'cure' him. he sounds like one of these natural worriers. just take it easy and take a laid back approach to him xxx
2007-08-08 03:26:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would suggest asking a doctor's advice. Therapy might be a good tool to get him past his problem, which could evolve to debilitating circumstances.
2007-08-08 03:16:12 · answer #8 · answered by smbfc 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
look up COPING WITH A HYPOCHONDRIAC on the web.
you'll probably find a lot of helpful information.
take care.
2007-08-08 03:20:49 · answer #9 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋