whats wrong with my son?

Question

my son is 4yrs old, he has a very short temper. if hes playing with other kids its also him that they fall out with and fight with. can anyone tell me what i can do. he also gets on really well with girls but not boys. help

Answer 1

He may need anger management help. Try talking to his doctor - he/she may be able to recommend someone that can help.

Answer 2

Your son is 4 years old. He needs to be taught how to properly manage his temper. When he acts out tell him what he did was wrong. Explain to him the proper way to act. Do this on a consistant basis. He has a fiery personality which can be good but needs to be trained. It will take some work on your part. You need to be consistant and loving. Don't ever tell him he's bad because of the way he's behaving but explain to him in terms he can understand that when he hits or calls someone a name that hurts them. Ask him to imagine what it would feel like if someone treated him that way. Loving consistancy is the key.

Another thing to consider is that often children show us what's going on in our own lives. They mimic what they see and hear. Take a good look at his environment. Is there anyone who acts the way that he's acting. Is there anyone who gets along well with females but not with males? If so, he may be doing you a favor by acting the way he is. He may be saying things have to change.

Please be cautious about having him diagnosed by a doctor as ADHD or any other of the popular acronyms used as an excuse to put kids on drugs to control their behavior. Instead of chemical control try to teach him behaviors that will help him to live more peacefully with himself and others. Deep breathing exercises or enrolling him in a yoga for kids class may help.

Answer 3

Have you taught him how to behave with other people? That's your job, mom, it doesn't come naturally. He sounds pretty normal for a 4yr old, and this is the time to step in and teach him how to behave around other people. There are many good books out there about raising children and what to expect at certain ages. You could also be checking out parenting web sites that will also give you some direction. You need to do this now, he's going to kindergarten next year and he can't become the school bully.

Answer 4

Observe him closely when he plays with the boys the next few times. See if he exhibits "bossy" or "bully" type behaviors toward the other boys. See if you can isolate just what it is that sets him off - such as, he didn't get his way and he gets angry...he wants the boys to do exactly as he says....he shows tormenting behaviors, etc. If he goes to preschool, as the preschool teacher what she has observed in his behavior. I would then schedule an appt. to talk with his pediatrician about the behaviors and go from there. You can also research these behaviors in a 4 year old on the internet and see if you find any enlightment here too.

Answer 5

I don't think the girl/boy connection has any relevance. Girls are less physically challenging than boys. He may be having to prove his self when he's around other boys, and that could be a source of the problem. But he sounds like he has ADHD. How does he do in school? If he's not in school, than he should be. School will teach children how to interact socially.

Answer 6

Children at this age, especially boys are usually very active.It is really too early to tell if your boy has sissy tendencies. Just observe if he has an abnormal behaviour everyday. If that is the case seek the advice of experts (medical or psychological).

Answer 7

HE DOES NOT HAVE ADHD. many parents make the mistake of "self diagnosing" there child who is a little more active than the rest. medicating your child is a short-term solution. boys are very~~ active. let them be!

Answer 8

He's a ladies man and a charmer already !
don't worry time will change him
either that or he could be gay, but if he's getting into fights and he has a strong father figure to look up to that seems unlikely
good luck xx

Answer 9

does he have a father in his life? if not i say get him a older male figure or if his father is around make his father more part of his life...it sounds like he just doesn't know how to act around boys like if one beats him at something he gets mad..because this is coming from his mom "you" i would say hes closer to you and knows how to act around girls that is why he always wants to hang out w/ them he knows how to treat them!

Answer 10

please don't mind is he completely normal if yes than its OK give him a full time and be good friend of him and shear his feeling &dont let him alone at any cost