hi well about almost 5 years ago i met the love of my life. for the past 5 years things have been great. we had, had our ups and downs, but that comes with all relationships. i was and i am still in love with my ex boyfriend. one day we had spent some time together and that afternoon when he had left he had said that he was going to call me that night as usual. he has not called me since that day, and everytime i try to get an answer out of him he says he doesnt care about me and he doesnt want to talk. he has recently been with a new girl and they are together now. my heart is shatered i gave my all to this guy. i cry everynight, and it has been 5 months. how do i get over him. this guy was my life. i love him. just i have no idea how to seriously move on. can someone help me please?
2007-08-07 12:14:30 · 18 answers · asked by lovesports 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Your first mistake sweetie was making someone other than yourself your first priority. You say this "guy" was your life. What was your life before this "guy"? It had to be something right? Heartaches are no fun and we have all been through them, but knowing that doesn't make that any easier. Moving on is first allowing yourself time to grieve. Grieve the dreams you had with him, about him, and about the future you had thought you were going to have with him. But only allow yourself so much time per day to do that. Surround yourself with friends or family. You must begin to remember what your life was life before this "guy". Also ask yourself some very important questions about your future mates. Exactly what is that you need and want and deserve. Don't you want a man who can be a man and answer you about why his feelings after so long have changed? Don't you want a man who doesn't just drop off things like that and make your heart heart? This "guy" isn't a man. He is a boy pretending to be a man. A real man would have told you and then also helped you along with the answers. Now how long do you plan on crying over this "guy"? Its normal for you to be hurt, but no normal for you to ever allow some 'guy" to become the center of your world unless its God. If you need to go to see a doctor and use some anti-depressants for awhile to help you ease the pain , then by all means do it. If you need to seek out a counselor to find out why you made this "guy" your world then please do so. You and you alone should understand that you should never make somone the be all and end off of your world. First of all that puts too much pressure on anyone. Secondly, that takes away your entire identity. I am sorry your heart is broken and I pray you heal fast and you will if you follow the advice that has been given to you. He isn't going to give you the answers you seek. So stop asking and think about "what now".... Work, school, your life... is FREEDOM now... your choices that are ahead of you are all yours to make. Now is the time to rejoice in knowing that all your ups and yours... and you can make it all happen for yourself!
2007-08-15 11:36:54 · answer #1 · answered by billies35 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh jeez, what a jackass this guy is. I was in a 2 year relationship and out of nowhere he broke up with me. I was honestly feeling like that was the end of the world and didnt know what to do with myself. I let myself hit rock bottom because i wasnt strong enough. I kept on thinking of the good times that we had and that wasnt helping, so then i started concentrating on the bad times to make it easier. Definitely try and hang out with your friends and family because they want the best for you. It has been 3 years since my ex and i have been broken up and i still do care about him, but it's definitely hard. It took me a LONG time to get over him and felt as if i was never gonna find love again, but trust me, just give it time and you will feel better about things, i promise. Take care.
2007-08-07 12:28:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am truly sorry, i know how it is to be heartbroken (2 year relationship, been 1 year since the heartbreak)
One thing I can tell you for sure, is that it WILL get better. I thought that it was the end of the world before, but eventually, I found a way out.
You can not move on to another guy just yet, it will be completely forced on your part. You can not replicate what you had (yet). Nothing will be same, but you will learn from it.
What to do:
1. Be tough, be strong. Learn to stand on your own two feet and be independent
2. Trust your family and friends. They will be there for you. They know what is best for you and will help you out more than you could ever imagine
3. It will be painful, but it will get better sooner than you think. When? I can't say. But you will be able to top it. You are much stronger than you could ever imagine (I learned about it myself last summer and this past fall)
4. Keep busy, focus on yourself, but don't be selfish. Work, run, take up a new hobby. I know it seems out there, but give it a shot, youve got nothing to lose.
5. You are better than him. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCE meet up with him. He will contact you, but DO NOT get back with him. Cut him out of your life completely. You will know when you can have him back, but it is not right now.
He is not the love of your life. That phrase will sting and tear at your heart, but he is NOT the love of your life.
2007-08-07 12:19:29 · answer #3 · answered by PSU840 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I totally understand!!! I've been through the same problem!!! All guys are the same!!! So here's what you do...If you know any of his friends ask them what happened. If that doesn't work then you study the girl that he is recently going out with. This may help you understand the differences between you and her. Or what he likes about her. Another reason why he is doing this to you is because he cant stand a real relationship maybe he just wanted a girl to go out with once and then give them away. That is why guys are so less mature then girls. I hope I helped!!!
2007-08-07 12:24:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the guy sounds like an ***...only time can heal these wounds in the mean time find methods such as working or volunteering or even spending more time with your family. Also take the labek of true love from this man and find you a headless abrocombie model and paste the words as his head. :) if you think about the ex look at the ab poster
2007-08-15 12:14:40 · answer #5 · answered by aleka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel but he wasn't the right one, God has someone very special for you. I broke up with someone because I found out that he was dating his old love, I suffered for 3 months. A few years later I found the man I married and he is much better than what I thought I had.
2007-08-07 12:37:28 · answer #6 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think you must? Cos, for those who feel you will have to thats the one way you will have to. It's your selection. But, if it had been me, i might keep stern, cos he did do some thing that make alot of problems on the time, correct? Whilst you learned he went and did the deed with your friend, did you cry? I simply wouldn't.. Nevertheless it's up to you.
2016-08-04 09:33:29 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just get hold of yourself and move on with your life.This guy is not worth it.If after five years he
decides to dump you His moral fibre is not all
that it should be.You would be better off
by engaging yourself in something more productive like trying to better your life,and
make a name for yourself.
2007-08-15 11:06:21 · answer #8 · answered by ramchandra b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not taking his side but he didnt' know how to break up and the fact you were together so long well i would wonder also i mean not surehow old you are but the longer you wait and no real meaning holding you two together well that can be it also. he was in love with her and left and that is how they (men) do it. sorry
2007-08-13 17:05:17 · answer #9 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
like everyone has said realize that you can do better its truly his loss he left you without saying a word dont give him the time or day that will only give him the oppurtunity to hurt you again you deserve better someone like that is not worth your time keep moving forward and never look back trust me its not worth the pain you will find someone who appreciates you.
2007-08-07 12:40:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋