Is it normal for 20 year old girls to be emotionally unstable?

Question

I am 20 and I have a wonderful girlfriend who is also 20, and I have been with her for about 2 and a half years. she is pretty much my dream girl save for one thing; she tends to overreact a lot. she says it's just hormones and that it's normal for girls her age to behave this way, but is that really true? for example, she gets very upset if i have a tired tone in my voice (because she thinks i sound bored), and she gets mad at me if i ask her if everything is okay when she sounds upset (because she says i am assuming). it's just little knit-picking things, but it drives me crazy when she gets super upset over things that do not merit it. but then other time she is the perfect girl whom i love very much. i don't know what to do. is this a phase she is going through or is this just how women are?

Answer 1

In some cases Yes, it depends upon the individual and this one appears to fall into that category.

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Answer 2

I hate to sound chauvinistic or make generalizations-and I'm sure I will get a lot of grief from the women, but after years of extensive dating and relationships of several years each and finally succumbing to marriage: you hit the nail on the head with your last words. That's just how women are...even my late Mother.

It is not only normal for 20 year old girls to be emotionally unstable, it's normal for women to be emotionally unstable period. However, you will find with age and life experience, women and people in general become more moderate and certainly more predictable.

She sounds like a lovely girl, you seem smitten, and 2 and 1/2 years is a good bit of time to get to know her and understand how you 2 relate to each other. If this issue is the only problem you have encountered thus far sounds like things are working pretty well.

Communication is essential to a good long-term relationship. So just let her know your concerns at a good time and place in a non-confrontational manner and it can only help. And let her know how much you love her and listen, listen. Maybe she's trying to say something not so transparent with these episodes that reflects an underlying concern, sentiment, or problem. And try not to get defensive when she acts this way, but rather see if (not saying that you do) you have any part in it honestly.

Anyway, hope this helps and good luck to you. Ain't love grand?

Answer 3

I am not pro-adoption by any means, but this blog post does not "prove" that adoption is wrong, any more than one car accident proves that driving is unsafe. It is an unfortunate situation for this mother and for her adopted children... and the rest of her family. And, unfortunately, it happens more often than it should. But would it have been better for these two children to have remained with an abusive first family? Or to keep shuttling them between foster families until they age out? Perhaps a more effective intervention with the first family and a reunification plan might have been better, but we can't possibly know. And if there was a better option available, one would hope that it would have at least been tried. Can you provide a better option for abused children when reunification with the first parents isn't possible? I can't. Where I have a problem with this is the unethical failure to disclose the full situation to the adopters in this case. They were dealt to from the bottom of the deck on this hand, and the result was that both the AP's and the children are on the losing side. I applaud this adopting mother for not dissolving the adoption, but hanging in there despite the underhanded way she was treated by the child welfare system. Perhaps with full disclosure either this family would have had a better chance of success or another, better prepared, family could have been found to adopt these two children.

Answer 4

Hello Mike this is how many women are even those whom are much older also. Don,t let her or any other woman frustrate you by trying to figure her or them out. In your life you will find that this will be the issue many times. What will help you is when she see,s that you are not getting frustrated. But this can cause her to get even more trippy, take care and good luck.

Answer 5

No, it's not normal. She's acting like a 13 year old. Blaming her hormones is a good clue for you that she's never going to accept responsibility for her behavior and that you need to go find a real woman.

Answer 6

Well it's only been 2.5 yrs and she's already knit-picking? The first couple years are supposed to fun,and you should be having sex like wild lions... jk lol... Just imagine what another 5 will be like with her knit-picking? you'll be emotionally unstable too... Yeah, good luck!

Answer 7

Stereotypes aside, of course it's not how all women are... Something's bugging her, and she may just feel a need to be perfect. It probably is just hormones, and from the sound of it you got a relatively minor case with your girl....

Answer 8

lol i am 20 and the only time i'm like this is when the crimson tide is coming, and i get super moody. i'm aware of it and i apologise to people in advance and warn them that i wouldn't mean to flare up. sometimes hormones DO affect emotions but she can't keep blaming hormonal changes forever. maybe she's already like that even without the hormonal changes that she just decides to conveniently blame her hormones. it's not uncommon, i know alot of girls who do that :>

she isn't like this all the time thou right?

there was once i thoguht my bf was bored talking to me when he was actually just tired (like you), and i thought he thought i was boring because he was talking on the phoen with we while watching tv. but that was when we were 17 and i was insecure about our relationship. maybe she's insecure about your relationship?

i think you should talk to her about it, my boyfriend did talk to me about it last time and i was so ashamed of myself.

Answer 9

Sounds like an average 20 year old girl - insecure, immature, and attention seeking.

Answer 10

most women aren't that moody.
Is it all the time? Or just a certain time of the month?
She could be bi-polar or something which causes constant mood swings.
Or she could just naturally be like that.
Try having a talk with her, but chose your words carefully.
Good luck :)