my matron of honor has not spoken to me in over 3 weeks, she is mad because I did not want her throwing me a bridal shower at my new house that my finance has under construction. and it was only to be a small number of people. I had told her to go in on the one my nieces(both in the wedding) and the family is throwing since most people would already be at that one.
I have tried to open the communication lines with her but with no luck
her husband is the best man and will not respond to my fiance either
I have been told to find someone else to fill her spot, but i am at a lost
i need some answers
2007-08-06 16:02:05 · 13 answers · asked by scarlett13854 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
along with that i had asked her in october to be in the position, and about 4 months ago she moved about 50 miles or more away, never gave us the address and has never onced asked if there was anything that she may be able to help with,
2007-08-06 16:28:58 · update #1
I would send them a very diplomatic e mail simply stating that this is a very important position for each of them in your wedding. That a lot of plans are being made and if you can not communicate with them then unfortunately you will need to replace them. If they can not respect the fact that this is your biggest day ever and that there is a lot more involved than just their feelings on a shower location, they should be replaced with someone that understands it is an honor to be chosen for these positions . You already have enough stress with family, budget, plans and so on, they should know better.
2007-08-11 06:41:56 · answer #1 · answered by Lillianne 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I would say that you definitely need to discuss this with her but if she's not answering your calls then that's kinda hard. I guess what I would do is send her an email or a letter and let her know how you're feeling. Tell her that if she doesn't take your feelings into consideration that you might have to find someone else to take her place. I know this may be hard but it is your wedding and it should be done your way and of all people your maid of honor should be able to respect that.
2007-08-10 04:52:58 · answer #2 · answered by Emily G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...I can understand both sides of this. To begin with, the Matron of Honor is supposed to be the one to host the bridal shower. Perhaps she felt slighted. Granted the Wedding Day is your special day, however, this incident was not the wedding day.
I would try to talk to her one more time. You just may find out that she felt hurt that you did not want her to throw you a shower. Perhaps she also feels that you are not sure about her being the Matron of Honor because of that.
I hope you can work it out. She must be a special friend in order for you to want her as your Matron of Honor.
2007-08-06 17:55:06 · answer #3 · answered by Diana 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would leave a message that both of them are out of the wedding if they have such an issue as this. You have good reason to not want it at a house that is under construction!
Promote a bridesmaid and a groomsman and be done with it.
2007-08-07 01:37:03 · answer #4 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would look for someone else after I tried to talk to her one more time. If she doesn't respond or isn't able to get past it then find someone else or promote one of the current bridesmaids. It sounds like you'd be losing a groomsmen too so the numbers would match up.
2007-08-06 16:06:31 · answer #5 · answered by indydst8 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW that is a really petty thing to stop talking to you about! Personally I would take myself to her house to talk about it and sort it out - if she still wont see you place a letter in her letterbox explaining that she and her husband are no longer invited to be part of your wedding - your special day (it sounds to me like she is acting like you have ruined HER special day??) very strange but please dont let it ruin your special day - if you cant sort it out replace them - forget them and move on with you new exciting life without her.
If however you speak to her and sort things out make sure you understand why she acted the way she did and that you think you can live with that reason and be confident she wont pull this kind of stunt again.
2007-08-06 16:09:52 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Kazz♥ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Make one attempt to contact her and tell her you need a matron of honor. If she doesn't answer that one find someone else.
2007-08-06 16:07:22 · answer #7 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Find someone else. Any one acting that childish over something that small should not stand up for you at your wedding. If they were really your friends they would not be acting like this.
2007-08-06 16:05:50 · answer #8 · answered by dreamer20692000 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
how long until your wedding?
I think she is being selfish. I would try like one more time, and if she's not willing to be mature and talk to you like a friend should... drop her out, fill her spot with somebody who actually cares about one of the biggest days of your life.
good luck hun!
and congrats
2007-08-06 16:06:57 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs.Neville 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your wedding is supposed to be stress free . I say replace her and enjoy your day and if her husband who is best man wants to act stupid as well , replace him too . Good luck , congrats and enjoy your wedding
2007-08-06 17:26:31 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ Army Wife ♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋