Is this a normal fear or phobia or whatever?

Question

First off, let me say I have OCD. I've been to therapy and taken meds for it and all that, but lately a new fear cropped up in my mind and it feels so real that it's hard for me to believe that no one else in the world feels it to. It started when I had to cut up some raw chicken for work and saw how slimy and veiny it was ect. and the thought popped up in my mind about my own interior body, how its slimy and veiny and muscular, and how its bloody meat, and the skeleton, which I'm used to seeing as a horror icon, hung as paper copies on doors on Halloween and the embodiment of the Grim Reaper, and this creepy thing is a part of my body! I just had this total wave of revulsion over my own interior body, I wished that I was imbued with like heavenly energy or something, that seems more attune to what my spirit means to me, the idea that its all just guts and blood saturated organs kinda sickens me, and its who I am. Is this OCD, am i bein irrational? or does anyone else go through this?

Answer 1

ALL phobias are irrational. Unfortunately almost everybody has some phobia. Try to forget about your body's interior. It got you this far! The human body is a remarkable machine. Far more intricate and complex than dead chicken parts. The two aren't even remotely close to resembling each other. Now convince yourself of this and move on.

Answer 2

I don't know if this will be helpful or not. When I was going through a stressful time a few months back someone loaned me some CDs called "Attacking Anxiety and Depression" with Lucinda Bassett. On one of the tapes she talked about how many high stressed people have scary obssesive thoughts. For instance, on the roof of a tall building and picturing yourself jumping off over and over again - though you know you won't actually do it you almost feel a compulsion to act. The gist of what she said is that these thoughts are all about anxiety - you're anxious about other issues that may not have faced so you distract yourself with these unrelated anxious thoughts - something that takes over your mind and allows that free-floating anxiety to settle somewhere. There's nothing really in the thoughts themselves.

Answer 3

I freaked out like this after I saw a display of chopped up dead people in a museum. One thing I can think to do (if you're religious, sounds like you somewhat are if you mentioned heavenly energy) is keep in mind that God put all that stuff in your body for a reason, plus he even made your skin opaque enough that nobody has to look at it. If you want, try reading the part of Genesis about the creation of Adam; even if you believe in evolution and don't literally believe that story, it may at least help to set your mind at ease.

Answer 4

Of course its' irrational, we are animals after all. We have all these disgusting innards. But since we are not heavenly beings we need all these things to stay alive.
But take it from a multi task-er phobic, no body is completely rational. Even shrinks have shrinks ,(and who needs one more than some guy who dwells on every one Else's irrationality)?. Have you considered vegetarianism. I myself find raw meat unpleasant to touch and prefer not to think about it when I do have to deal with it and I have a horror of blood..

Answer 5

Time to go back to therapy. Your body is a wonderful miracle. Your skeleton is the framework that supports it. Appreciate it. And change jobs.

Answer 6

The more you know how your body works, the more beautiful it all is. Muscle growth fascinates me. Learn more, and you'll get pass the stigma.