how can i get my mother off my back and let me live my own life? im a grown woman!?

Answer 1

If you are an adult and living on your own, you simply tell her to butt out. If you are living with her, then perhaps something more tactful would be in order.

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Answer 2

I got angry at my mother too but now that I have my own child, I realize no matter how old our kids get, we still worry.
With my own mother, I wrote her a letter expressing how I felt, I am 40 and I care for her and my dad (both are in their 70's and not in good health) my 2 brothers are in their late 40's and my mother would never say, expect or do to them what she does with me. I cannot stay angry because she has Parkinson's Disease which with the anger, comes the guilt as well. But I still sometimes see the true B-ch she can be even under the PD.
If I am over there and discipline my daughter, she sticks up for her, she pushes junk food on my daughter and I don't want her to have all that - I do moms hair every Thursday morning and mom pushes CREAM SODA AND COOKIES AT 10:30 in the morning? I told my mother numerous times that I don't want her having soda in the morning muchless with cookies.
It's a mother-daughter thing and I have this with my mom AND my own daughter.
You cannot change her, only how you react to what she says and does. The best thing is never argue, just agree and do what you were going to do anyway.
Back when I wrote that letter to her (and dad too) I expressed how I was concerned for them, and expressed how I do not get the respect I deserve to have.

With all i do, mow their grass, do moms hair, groom their schnauzer, take mom to doctors, grocery store, etc.. etc..
my brothers and their families do NOTHING- yet THEY get the respect.

I truly know what you are feeling- the only thing that keeps me from snapping is that I think to myself that some day I will only WISH I had mom here to complain about. This goes for anyone though with or without Parkinson's- Something could happen in a matter of seconds, minutes, days, weeks, months . I try not to leave mom or dads presence angry because if God forbid anything were to happen, I don't want my last words or actions to them be nasty ones. I could never live with myself .
Try to remind yourself of that when she gets under your skin.

Answer 3

Tell her to mind her own damn business! Or just stop talking to her.

(In my family we send letters lol)

Answer 4

Move out of her house. Don't tell her where you are.