how do you get a 4 year old to start potty training?

Question

i have a 4 year old boy that we need to potty train he is missing his first year of school because of it.we have tryed everything even giving him money he just refuses to go now his two year old brother is almost broke.i took him out of pull up on day and after five min past i asked him if he had to go and he said no looked at me and went right there on the floor .i just dont know where to start please iam up to trying anything.

my child is not handcapped in any way he is very smart . thank you so far i will try some of it.

Answer 1

I just potty trained my son and daughter and I used The Potty Stool http://www.thepottystool.com I started by just setting it at the toilet. My kids immediately climbed up on the stool and discovered that they could safely use the toilet. This got them very interested in using the toilet and they were potty trained very quickly.

It really helps boys to pee standing up so they can see what is happening and connect the sensations.

I like that I don't have to double the steps of potty training by training them first in a potty and then training them to stop using a potty. And not dumping and cleaning a potty each time is great. The best thing is that kids use it for years. I hope this helps you.

Answer 2

4 wow, have him help you throw away all diapers then take a trip to the store have him pick out the potty and undies, buy a lot of undies, then jump right in, the first few days i would stay home and let him run around with just a shirt and put the potty in the room you mostly stay in, you will have a lot of laundry, when you go out bring an extra change of clothes or two, when he uses the potty, dance praise clap do the jig, you will think you are not getting any where at times but you are, it will be done in ten days, most important to get all diapers out of the house , that is so you cannot give in, good luck, i have trained my 4 boys this way and they were all trained by 18 months, i wish you all the luck

Answer 3

Put him in underwear. When they're wet, don't immediately take them off. Make HIM do it. He will probably struggle and it won't be fun. If he has to change himself everytime he messes them up, he'll learn to use the potty soon enough.

You might want to also see a child psychologist about this. There's actually a disorder in the DSM IV for kids who are old enough to use the toilet but still wet themselves. Enuresis. The DSM IV states that the child has to be at least 5 to be diagnosed with this. He must be wetting his pants or bed at least twice a week. Even by age 18, 1 percent of males still have this. Many normal children still wet the bed by age 12, and 3/4 of these children have a 1st degree relative who was also enuretic.

Ridiculing the child doesn't help and only adds to the problem. Keep reassuring him and tell him he's a big boy and you know he can do this. If it doesn't work itself out by the age of 5, consult a doctor.

Answer 4

Kids are all different when it comes to learning things like this. Our 2 1/2 boy knows about the potty, he knows "stinky" and "ewww", and has actually used the potty, but it's been MONTHS and it's really still hit-and-miss, mostly miss. Don't let anyone tell you "Shame on you" or "It's all your fault". He may be acting out in sibling rivalry, or just... not ready. It'll come eventually. Try the Potty Book for Boys, or Elmo's Potty Video, a star chart, whatever. Don't use money, or food. There's also The Everything Potty Training Book by Linda Sonna. Good Luck.

Answer 5

First thing I'd do is check with his doctor and make sure there's not some physical issue. Assuming all's well ...
Here's what's working at my house (with a very bright, potty-resistant 3-year-old).
1. Pick a "D-Day" with your child. After that day, there will be NO diapers or pull-ups during the day. Talk about it a lot, and even make a calendar to track the time 'til that day. Make a big deal about it being a very big deal that he's going to go in the potty like a big boy. Take him shopping for cool underwear he'll want to wear.
2. On D-Day, and forever after, do not give in. No more daytime diapers (or pull-ups, which are really just diapers), period. You will have messes, and you will just have to deal with them. (Investing in some high-quality training pants with a water-resistant liner is a good idea for the first couple of weeks. Imse-Vimse and Niji both make good ones. The Nijis are more like regular underwear, but less absorbent.)
3. Keep a chart. One sticker for every pee, two for every poop -- and when it's full, he gets a special treat of his choosing. Make it something he'll have to work for, but not so difficult that he'll just give up. A small treat for each success (along with lots and lots of praise, which is actually more important) is appropriate, but make it something very small, like a chocolate kiss. (I've also heard of people allowing their child to play with a favorite toy only when they've successfully used the potty.)
4. Don't make a huge deal out of accidents, but stress the difference between accidents and choosing to go in his pants. Choosing to go in his pants is not OK. (Don't shame or punish him, but have him help clean up and calmly discuss how uncomfortable and messy it is, and how much easier it is to just use the potty.)
5. Watch for signs he has to go -- and tell him it's time to sit down. Don't ask, tell. (Read stories, sing songs, etc., if that helps keep him put until he's done.)
6. The first few days to a week will take almost 24-hour vigilance and will be stressful for all of you. But if you're firm (and gentle), he'll catch on pretty quickly.
Good luck!

Answer 6

DONT listen to all these rude folks here who have nothing better than to judge others.

Often times, when you have an older child and a younger child (particularly if the elder is a boy), they don't want to lose that "close time" with mommy.

In their little minds they think that the diaper is the last tie to you as mommy and baby, and sometimes that scares children.

I would sit with your son and explain to him that just because he has to start going potty like a big boy doesn't mean that mommy or daddy are going to spend any less time with him or give him less attention.

I would also make sure that there isn't anything medically wrong with him, so make sure you get your pediatricians unsubstituted advice.

Good luck, and just have patience!

Answer 7

Well some kids just bloom a little later:)
In my experience in being a nanny, I kept stickers in the bathroom, and when the little kid goes, he gets a sticker and he gets to flush the toilet. Right after you feed him, take him to the bathroom, and set him on the potty. Ask him if he has to go potty, and then wait for a minute. Kids usually go fairly quickly after drinking and eating...If not then just keep taking him in there say every 30 minutes. Thats what Ive done, and yes it can be overwhelming to do over and over again. Young kids really don't understand money so that wouldn't work. Its better to use stamps, stickers, and maybe even extra time at the park or in the backyard.

Answer 8

What i did was put him in big boy underwear.. let him pick out his favorite and tell him if you potty in these they will be taken away.... Give him rewards.. Like stickers or a new toy (like those pinata toys) every time he goes or make a chartMy nephew didn't get potty trained until he was four either.... He has an Immunodeffency and everytime we got close he ended up in the hospital. We finally got him potty trained 2 months ago.. So I know your pain!

Answer 9

I could definately speak to the surgeon. Make definite there are o bodily issues that want healing. Barring that, you would take a look at anything like this: Put him in a diaper (pull up) and do not say a different phrase approximately the potty. Your son is gambling a manage sport with you. He is letting you recognize that he's in manage of his frame. You can threaten and punish all you wish, it's going to mainly make this worse. He fairly is in manage. You can not make him pass to the toilet. Pay plenty of awareness to him throughout this time. Play with him. Make definite he's getting optimistic awareness for well behaviour and no awareness for this loo factor. Make definite he's getting such a lot optimistic awareness from you that he does no longer have to use the toilet factor to get your awareness. Make it transparent to him that you're giving him manage over his toileting. Then make certain he is aware of you imply it. If he has held it goodbye he are not able to stroll ask him if he could such as you to take him to the potty. If he screams no, say OK, you'll be able to pee on your pull up correct wherein you're. Then stroll away. Don't supply awareness to the poor behaviour. He will pee without or with you status there yelling or begging. So stroll away. Make it transparent to him that he's responsible of this loo factor. You are simplest going to aid him if he demands his pants undone, or anything. Along with this, I could give up any a laugh journeys out of the apartment, just like the park or the playground. Don't take him to playdates. Tell him that considering that he does no longer use the potty he has to stick house. Make definite he is aware that staying house is HIS option while he chooses to not use the toilet. Staying house isn't a punishment, this is a end result of the choice he made. Make definite you're very informal approximately all this. Don't be emotional. Let him realize that you recognize he'll be able for the potty quickly, however do not make a giant deal over it. Probably may not paintings in a single day, however after a couple of weeks this could paintings if you're giving him plenty of optimistic reinforcement. I could additionally supply him plenty of water and fiber even as you're employed this out. That will aid with the constipation and can hold his kidneys and bladder healthful. This is essential becuase retaining your urine isn't healthful and retaining bowel routine makes you constipated. When bowel routine get fairly painful this quandary gets worse. Is he looking alot of TV? This explanations fairly poor behaviour in my daughter. I could shrink on TV time. Our rest room issues are consistently worse on days that she watches alot of TV.

Answer 10

At 4 i would get rid of he nappies put him in pants and stop bribing him, this is part and parcel of his way to manipulate you...why on earth would you give a four year old money...and why should he go to the potty when all he has to do is milk it a little while longer and get more treats...

take him out of nappies put protective sheets on his bedding...makes sure you have spare bedding...if he piddles on the floor ignore it...give him a cloth to help clean it up (trust me on this please), every time you go to the loo take him with you and he gets to try, praise him if he does try even if nothing comes out....when he does pee pee on the toilet...congratulate him for being a big boy then say no more...