Trying to be a good Christian while dating...?

Question

Ok, this is a serious question so I am looking for Christians to answer. Here's my situation. I am 23 years old and I am a virgin. I made the choice a long time ago to wait until I was married before having sex. It really hasn't been that hard for me to resist. However, I am now dating a guy that I really like. It's been about 7 weeks now and we had "the talk" last weekend. I told him that I'm a virgin and that I'm saving myself for marriage and he was so wonderful about it. He totally respects that and even said he admires me for it. He is 29 and is not a virgin. While he is willing to wait for sex, I don't want our relationship to be boring, especially because he is more experienced. And to set the record straight, he is in no way pressuring me to do ANYTHING. He is fine with just kissing. But I guess my question is, how far can you go with a person and still be a good Christian and save sex until marriage?

Just to clear things up...I am NOT going to sleep with him. I'm devoted to my decision to wait and I've come this far, so I am not going to throw it away now.

Also, thank you to all who gave me serious answers.

Answer 1

Firstly, I would pray about it, because God WILL answer your question. Secondly, I would do what your conscience truly tells you to do. What God thinks and what all of us here on Earth think can often be two different things. Secondly I would read what the Bible has to say. If you want some good verses email me or im me. Sex is something that God gave us as a special gift as long as we do not abuse it. I highly respect you for waiting, and I firmly believe that on your wedding night, it will be something truly special.

Answer 2

I guess one question is how far can you two go without giving in? It's dangerous territory. You've made the right choice and he's doing the same by waiting, too. A kiss at the door is reasonable. A long, passionate kiss at the door is probably OK, too. But making out leads to sex; or at least it does when you get married. I'd steer clear and rely on God to keep both of you pure. Remember, even though your boyfriend isn't a virgin, he's never been with you. That alone can be a great blessing when and if you two get married.

Answer 3

Yes, it really is true. We take life to the fullest. Who would know the most about sex? Well, it would be the person/being that created it. In other words, God. God told us not to have sex until we marry, and since he invented it, he must know the best way of having it. And that is when you're married, and sure that the person is fully pledged to you, and you don't have to worry about "what if"s (if you know what i mean). A lot of these comments say how many Christians get abortions, and divorces, etc. But there are many people who say they are Christians but do not. And even those who are really Christians make mistakes, though we try our hardest to become day by day more like Jesus, who was perfect.

Answer 4

I am not a Christian, I hope you don't mind me answering your question.This is the perfect opportunity for you to really get to know each other. If you're looking for a meaningful relationship having sex with him after 7 weeks isn't gonna do it. There is a lot of things you can do with each other that don't pertain to sex, you can get close without actually having sex also. He says he admires you and respects your decision. That's good, now all you have to do is get to know him better to see if he will stick it out with you. But please note, this is only OK for you to hold out until marriage because you are under 28 years of age. Women generally get into their heated period around 28. If you're still waiting until marriage after 28, I would be concerned for your health. I hope you get married before that. good luck to you and god bless.

Answer 5

There are some Christian couples that have held out even to the point of no kissing while dating. I can't say that is the right thing to do but I do think it is important to refrain from sex before marriage. The whole dating thing as a Christian is odd. Some say that you should not even date someone seriously unless you plan on marrying them.

Answer 6

I think you should just kiss. I am a christian. I originally planned to wait until marriage but once I went off to college I strayed. I honestly wish I can take back what I did but I can't. All I can do is ask God for forgiveness and live my life according to his will. Now as far as you and your boyfriend are concerned...you should just kiss. It is too hard to keep you relationship pure if you do more than that. You will be setting yourself up for failure if you do otherwise. The more you do the more you will want. Keep God first and foremost in your mind. Dont allow yourself to be tempted. Good luck!!

Answer 7

It's really up to you, but remember that the most important thing is this: if you DO decide to have sex, use protection.


In fact, at your age, repression is probably not healthy, so you should be on some sort of birth control anyway. The last thing you want is to end up unprepared and then get yourself pregnant.

You will probably end up sleeping with the guy, so there's no use fooling yourself. Play it safe.


Another reason it's a good idea is that you're only a few weeks into your relationship. You do NOT want to rush marriage, especially at your age. You are young. If you sleep with the guy, it's not such a bad thing, but if you run off and marry him (so you can sleep with him that way), you could end up making the both of you extremely unhappy.

A healthy sexual relationship will help you avoid making mistakes like that. It'll also save you disappointment, since you might build up your wedding night as some sort of ideal heavenly time, only to be disappointed when it hurts and you don't get any pleasure out of it.

Answer 8

Seven weeks and he's already talking about sex? He's going to want something. Oral sex, anal sex, and finger f-ing is sex if that is what you are asking. I never understood why some Christians feel that anal sex and fingering is okay, but no penis-vagina. I guess we are all using the Bill Clinton sex definition. Anything naked is sex.

I was dumped 15+ times by "Christians" for being a virgin. They told me I looked too "hot" to be a virgin. I eventually gave in because I was sick of the heartache. No one told me in sex ed virgins were supposed to be fat and ugly. Hope it works out for you. It didn't for me.

Answer 9

I hope I'm misunderstanding your question.
There isn't anymore physically to do and keep your vow. So I guess time in prayer together and fellowship with Christians that you both know and like. Doesn't have to just be at church you know. Perhaps a Christian project to help others. Lots to do to avoid boredom.
I've always thought you really know you are comfortable together when you can be in a room for an extended time and not have any thing to say to each other. No reaching out to please just being with. Also if you can fart and not worry about it. Good luck.

Answer 10

Ouzibillahi Mina Shytan Al Rajeem
Bismillah Al Rahman Al Raheem
Ya Habibi Allah
Ya Al Abdul Wakeel ya Muhammed SAW
Ya Sadiq ya Abrahim A.s.
Ya Sadiq ya Musa A.s.
Ya Sadiq ya Isa A.s.
Ala kil Al Ambyiate Salam! Takbeer Allah Akbar!

Will you give it up already those of the book are protected by the book, you know i am human being and I error but I just go back the lab and make some more web slinging string, sew my tights back up, oh of course I do that what you think I am some character on TV, surely you don't know the real me. I only know your a fake and a fraud and I don't care what you post because my Lord the Merciful one with Allah SWT behind his name keeps bringing me out of our fire and smoke and tells me, you can repent and you can show peace always and the good ones oh they will shine brighter than any of your light bulbs in the house. So please keep posting so we can really know what the heck you really are IBLIS!

Salam Alaikum Wu RahmatAllah Wu Barakathu Shoo be jabtak hatoo, ya Allah Masad Ya Habibii Rasool Allah Ya Isa, A.s. Yaya Ya Wakeel, ya Musa Ya Habibi, Ya Allah! Ya Allah shine baby shine! I told you once and I will tell you again, yeeeeeeeeee hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...

Source(s):

Al Quran Al Karim the Truthful Words of Allah SWT The Lord The only True King of the final day!
Al Tranlation of the Quran
And many verified parts of the faith before till Adam our Father and he had sons yes they had daughter too and thats us wake up!