What's your opinion about having a cash bar at a wedding?

Question

I'm just wondering. Open bar is CRAZY expensive-I've been to a ton of weddings with cash bars and I don't even think twice about it, but I've heard/read some really snarky comments from people about them. So I'm curious what people think?

Answer 1

While it IS your responsibility to provide refreshments to your guests, it IS NOT your responsibility to provide alcoholic refreshments to your guests.

If they have other options (water, iced tea, soda, punch, etc.), then there is no rule that says you have to provide them with booze.

Providing refreshment does not imply or include providing a free evening of drunken debauchery.

As a guest, I can tell you that I would prefer a cash bar to no bar at all.

Here's how I look at it...It really depends on the crowd (as you can tell by the number of different answers here!). All of the people invited to your wedding are people you know and love, yes? If that same group of people would be happy to come to your house for a BYOB party, then they'll be fine with a cash bar. Alternately, if your peeps are the type who would expect an open bar and be offended by a cash bar, then look at paring down the guest list and including the booze for everyone.

Answer 2

I agree that people who have never been to a 'cash bar' wedding must run with the high-rollers! I have never been to a wedding that had an open bar, and I never thought it was rude that I had to pay for drinks. I would happily pay a couple of bucks for drinks. I'd rather do this than have my friends or family run up a huge bill just to pay for booze at their wedding.
I think water, pop, juice, coffee should be provided for free...and its nice to have bottles of wine on the tables. I'm getting married in a week and we are having 2 bottles of wine on each table (tables of 8, and not cheap wine!). Non-alcoholic drinks are free and we have also paid down part of the bar so that instead of 5$ a drink, our guests will only pay $3. I think this is a nice compromise. Its what we can afford, but our guests are not going to have to spend a huge amount of cash.

Do what you feel is best. I don't think its 'low class' to have a cash bar, as long as you do provide some refreshments for your guests. Most of your guests won't mind at all, and the few that make comments aren't worth worrying about. Good luck in deciding. I'm sure your wedding will be great.

Answer 3

I get really annoyed at the people who think that having a cash bar is tacky. Well screw that honestly. You do what YOU can afford, and what you want to do. If you can do it, great, if you can't, still great. You think your friends and family are going to be upset that you're not providing them unlimited booze? If they are upset at that, then too bad for them. You're going to get your etiquette enthousiasts that are going to blast you for not having your name brand fork, forget about it. Open bars are very expensive, and you're still paying for all your guests to eat dinner and everything else the day entails, I don't see anything wrong with having a cash bar. Some options are to have an open bar for the first hour, or find a way where each guest has 2 complimentary drinks, etc. You may also be able to see if your reception site will allow you to purchase your own alcohol and have it served. Cheaper that way. Some sites won't allow it though (like mine) The only thing I'm able to bring in is my cake and the favours which are edible. If I wanted to bring my own wine in, they would charge me up the a**! So I bought their insanely expensive wine, lol. It's all about it being just one day too though, don't break yourself for just one day. Do it on your budget, do it on a budget you'll be able to live with.

Good luck! :)

Another thought after reading some other comments.... It's not like saying "hey you're invited, but also, you're paying" ... There are lots of people who just don't drink. Alcohol is not a MUST. If wanted, it's there, at your own cost. See what I'm saying, ridiculous people. I think that critizing someone over their choices on such events is tacky. I'm also not saying that I'm not doing an open bar, because I am - but not for the reason that I think it's tacky not to. That was NO WHERE in my reason to have one. You do what you want, people will still have an awesome time, and who cares about having to pay a few bucks for a drink!!!!

Answer 4

Apparently the people who say a cash bar is tacky have tons of money to spend on events like weddings. So if you run with the blue blood crowd and vacation in the Hamptons and Aspen, it is probably tacky to have a cash bar.

For everyone else who have normal or average incomes, cash bar is perfectly acceptable. I have never been to an open bar even because they are ridiculously expensive. It is better to have a cash bar, than no bar at all.

You could probably have a compromise, like a cocktail hour and have complimentary wine and champagne served, then after have a cash bar. But it is completely up to you and what your budget is.

Don't stress about it, if people are going to complain about the cash bar then they missed the whole point of the wedding.

Good luck!

Answer 5

I think a cash bar at a wedding is really low class. If you can't afford to have an open bar throughout the whole wedding reception, then maybe you could consider serving only wine. Another alternative could be an open bar for only a couple of hours. I think its in better taste not to serve any liquor than asking your guests to pay for it. Many guest will come unprepared for a cash bar and end up really being ticked off. No matter how you do it, the bride and groom look bad. IMHO

Answer 6

It is up to what you can afford really. Some people have an open bar up until a certain level of alcohol is drunk or up to a time limit, or money limit,then they switch to cash bar. Just get someone to announce that the free booze is over.
I think as long as you provide the wine for the toasts, then cash bar is perfectly acceptable. People can get drunk on their own cash. You might be avoiding situations like the question below "I got drunk and ruined my best friends wedding" lol
Good luck.

Answer 7

As a guest at a wedding, I would find a cash bar very rude. You really can't invite people to an event that you are supposedly hosting and expect them to pay for anything. I would find it much more gracious if the host either A) had no alcohol at all or B) provided either just beer and wine or a simple punch. Of course you shouldn't go into debt just to have an open bar, but you really need to walk the fine line between saving some $$ and alienating your guests by having them foot the bill for it.

Answer 8

personally I dont like them and I didnt have one. we did open bar. we invited people to come to the wedding and have a good time on us. I dont want to invite people to my wedding then say sorry but you have to buy your own drinks. I did limit the type of drinks available to beer, wine, rye, rum ande vodka, but it didnt cost my guests a cent. I figure if I'm going to charge peopel for drinks then why not charge them for dinner and admission too. whatever is available at the wedding should be at no cost to the guests. I would rather see a wedding with no alcohol then have to pay for it.

and just to go along with some peoples comments...I did get married, I did have an open bar and I did foot the bill for it...me being 19 and him being 21 at the time both working at fast food joints so dont even start the the "you wouldnt want the bill" crap cuz its bull...if you arent even the slightest bit concerned for how your guests will feel and its your wedding and you'll do it your way then why invite anyone at all? just elope and buy your own drinks.

Answer 9

After having read some of the other comments, I have to reply.

It is your wedding, your day...do what you want. If someone thinks that having to buy themselves a drink is tacky, then they do not care about you and are not present at the event to celebrate with you.

Answer 10

It's simply rude. Frankly, we were pleasantly surprised by how NOT expensive it was to have an open bar for 200 guests!
If a couple can't afford to host a full open bar, along with a lovely dinner, they should be scaling down the number of guests they are having or the style of the wedding.
Here's an example: When our GUESTS come to our home for a party, we feed them and we offer them drinks - and don't require them to pay for them. How in the world could one think of asking someone to pay for something when they are GUESTS, such as for a wedding??? It's the duty of the couple to be good hosts, and provide everything graciously!