Should I tell my parents about my religious beliefs? Atheists and Christians, please answer!?

Question

Both of my parents are devout Christians, and after spending my youth in the church, I've realized that I simply hold no stock in what I was taught. I can't really call myself an athiest, since I know that we can't disprove God, but I know that I definitely don't believe in the Christian God. I believe that my parents suspect that this may be the case, but I'm not sure if I should actually tell them. What do you think? I'm especially interested in the opinion of Christian parents. If your child rejected your God, would you want to know, or would you rather not know? My parents are both great people, and the last thing I want to do is hurt them, but I don't think I'm doing anyone any favors by pretending to be something that I'm not. What would you do?

To clarify- I was raised Christian. This is not a new concept to me. Telling me to read the bible does nothing to change my beliefs. I've probably read it more than you. Please don't try to convince me about God, you won't win, and that's not what my question is about. Read the question if you are unclear.

I think I'll have to put this up to a vote, I just can't pick a best answer. It's a seven way tie for me, so please vote for what you think is best answer. Thanks to everyone for answering!

Answer 1

I told my mum i was pagan at about 20 or so, she took it better than i expected. The same would probably happen to you.

Devout or not, you're still their child, they should love and care for you regardless of what your religion is.

Answer 2

You will have to decide about telling your parents that you have rejected Christianity.

I never told my parents that I had rejected Christianity, but they probably figured it out. They are both deceased.

I was raised Catholic but haven't been to Mass on a regular basis for a long time (30 years).

What reasons do you have to tell them?
What reasons do you have not to tell them?

I obviously would not be terribly upset if my children told me that they did not believe in the God that they were raised to believe in. We are all free to believe anything that we wish to believe.

I am a Deist. I am open to God, but not a faith type God. Anything that is reasonable is okay with me.

Talk of proving or disproving God's existence is rather a waste of time. Those who believe cannot make a logical proof for God's existence. Those who do not believe cannot prove the non-existence of God either. The best way that I know how to put it is to look into the sky on a starry night and then tell me what you think about the existence of God.

Answer 3

Honor thy Mother and thy Father. You need to be serious and respectful and very honest. If your parents are Christians they may be hurt but they probably are willing to forgive you anything. If they didn't love you kid you would know it.
Don't try to teach Dad how to suck eggs. You say you have been taught but let's get real how much do you really know about the Lord's word. You can never know too much.
So don't preach or attack. Calmly discuss your feelings and give them time to let it soak in. I'm sure they will want you to do some review on where you've been and with who so be prepare and think about that.
Better have a source for your beliefs or lack of them too.
It won't be fun but the up side is that your parents may be able to help you regain your faith. Good Luck

Answer 4

Hey! I thing your parents and even God doesn't want you to lie. You wrote that your parents are Cristians, so their faith must be strong enough to carry your problem with you. Anyway truth is always the best.
You wrote that you don't belive in the Christian God, but you know we can't disprove Him. So you feel that someone is "upsters" do you? If the answer is yes I have one more question: Have you ever tought of telling your problems to Him? 'cause I think this is what He's really waiting for. If He exists He must answer once don't you think?Maybe now or later.
So just tell the truth to eweryone, that's the best.
God Bess:)
Richard

Answer 5

I dont know what you was tought. this is satan's world and he has a lot of his churches out there. I come from a Christian family, went to church all the time, spend my summers in one of the Great Lakes church camps. In my Father's house, only church music was allowed. I believed in God, but I did'nt believe in the teaching of the Church. I spend my life studying the Bible, going to this church and that church, I took Bible study classes. I found my true way by asking God to give me the under standing , and I read the Bible through, and then I got a King James study Bible, and started reading the Bible, by different subjects. You know you can find any thing you want to know about in the Bible, it's a book that will lead you through life the right way. Most of the churches out there is not the true church of God, His church does not keep sunday as the day of rest. saturday , the seventh day is the day. Jesus said "no one can come to me unless he be send by the Father, that send me."ou can't join God's church, you have to be called. By the was the church is not a builden, its the called out ones ( the people).God's church is hard to find. There's a lot of so called churches out there, those that have there day of rest on sunday, most likely is'nt the church of God. Read your Bible, ask for the understanding, it will open your eyes and absorb you. You can get lost in it The Bible has all kind of stories , love storys, adventure storys (David)
(Ruth), It well solve all your problems.
You have to come to God your self in your way, Tell your parents, and explain to them how you feel, ask them to let you find your way. I know you must have loveing parents and they will understand.
You do read books dont you . I tought my children to read books, you learn from books. Now why not read the greatist and best selling book . A study bible will have an index where you can look up subject, and it will give you were you can find answers in the bible.
God Bless you, .

Answer 6

It seems, that you are a great seeker of truth and that you might understand, that there is much more beyond Chistian beliefs. As a spiritual seeker you can find all your answers inside yourself, that the true religion is the dharma, the right conduct of life and that is it not related to any major religion. It is deep within ourselves. I went through the same experience with my parents, we had lots of fights, but finally I just let go of it, let them do their own stuff, and I started to meditate. What i've learned is, that on our spiritual path we are alone, individual seekers and our spiritual growth is also individual. If you walk on your path, you are improving and your parents will feel changes in you. What brought the big change in my life is Sahaja Yoga Meditation. It is an amazing experience, feeling a cool breeze above your head and getting the awakening of your inner energy, the Kundalini. You can check out their website www.sahajayoga.org.
Wish you all the best in your search for the truth.

Answer 7

My parents are great people too. That's why I've always been able to talk about anything with them. I became an atheist when I was sixteen after being brought up in a christian family. I like to refer to myself as a humanist instead of an atheist though. It says more about what I am and not what I'm not. You can google humanism but here's a short version. If your parents can't respect you for being this type of person then maybe they're not such great parents after all.

Humanism is a philosophy of life inspired by humanity and guided by reason. It provides the basis for a fulfilling and ethical life without religion.

Humanists make sense of the world using reason, experience and shared human values.
Humanists see no convincing evidence for gods, the supernatural, or life after death.
Humanists believe that moral values are properly founded on human empathy and scientific understanding.
Humanists believe we must live this life on the basis that it is the only life we'll have -- that, therefore, we must make the most of it for ourselves, each other, and our world.
Humanist philosophies have arisen separately in many different cultures over many thousands of years. Whether or not they use the term humanism, tens of millions of Americans and hundreds of millions of people around the world agree with the humanist philosophy of living a happy and productive life based on reason and compassion.

Answer 8

First, I would recommend you examine your own heart and your motives for not believing in a "Christian" God. Do you believe in some *other* god? If you were brought up in a devout Christian family and in a church where the blood of Christ and sin were preached, along with God's love and redemption for confessed and repented sins, why did you decide you wanted to turn away? Are you like the Prodigal in the Bible and Billy Graham's son, Franklin, both of whom chose to live in a profligate manner? Remember, both of them eventually came to their senses!

I spent the first 15 - 20 years of my life more or less believing in God and attending Sunday School and church services fairly regularly; but in my hometown Methodist Church, the pastor read his sermons *and* his prayers, rather than preaching and praying from his heart! I never heard a sermon about the blood of Christ, nor much about sin, from any of the three different ministers our church had during my growing-up years!

By the time I entered the Army in 1961, I had pretty much discounted any influence of God and Jesus on my life, couldn't seem to see any evidence God cared about me or about what I did or did not do, couldn't understand why I had to keep dropping out of college to get enough money to complete my education beyond high school, couldn't understand why I had to go through everything I seemed to have to go though, didn't know why "no one" cared about me and about my struggles, didn't believe that anyone, not even God, cared whether I lived or died. As soon as I got to the Army fort that was my first permanent duty station, I decided to have new dogtags made which would say I was an "Agnostic", instead of a "Methodist"!

What brought me (not brought me *back*) to a saving knowledge of God and of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, was His unconditional (agape) love for me, both directly, and through the young woman who eventually became my wife. *Finally*, I understood the great sacrifice Jesus made for me on the Cross at Golgotha, and, at age 25, decided to repent of my sins, ask Jesus into my heart and accept Him as my personal Lord and Savior.

If you don't want to hurt your parents *and* don't want to pretend to be something you are not, why don't you ask your parents if you can sit down with them, and perhaps your pastor, and have a serious discussion about this matter? Then you can get it all out in the open and see if you can resolve the matter that way.

Answer 9

Hey hey! You sound just like me when I was your age. I think you should tel them; if your parents really are devout Christians like you say, they'll handle the news better than you think, if they don't know already. I went down the path you are thinking of, and if my hunch is right, you are not going to get very far without a struggle. But it is also not doing you any good to pretend either, cuz God can already see that. Do me one favor before you venture out; ask God to show you who He really is, ok?

Answer 10

It would depend on the dynamics of your family and how you interact with each other. In short, it all boils down to the level of RESPECT [and Love] that you have for each other's opinions and beliefs.

Another factor would be if you are still a minor and/or staying at home with your parents. That would be to your disadvantage since they will feel slighted for having failed in your upbringing, especially in matters of faith.

You would probably have a better chance of being "heard" by them, or for them to treat you more as an adult if you are self-supporting and had your own place before opening up the subject of religion.

Otherwise, by all means, do so and discuss your own beliefs with them... without getting too defensive or being combative about it. Can YOU truthfully do that without hurting their feelings??? I wish you all the best and good luck!

Peace be with you.

Answer 11

I told everyone in my family that I am an atheist when I realized that lying was not something I was comfortable with.

You are not responsible for the reactions of people you tell your truths to.

I know it is hard to be open with some people and sometimes those who love you are the hardest to be honest with. If they truly love you, they will be open to your path, whatever path that may be-as long as you are honest and open about what you think and feel. You are not harming anyone with your lack of beliefs. How you choose to believe or not believe is totally your decision.

Everyone in my family is religious except me. And my husband.

My Mother lays the guilt on-very heavily. She says "we wont be together in Heaven."

I respond by saying:

"So, lets have a great life together now. Lets love each other the best way we know how. I want to be open and honest with you and my journey in life doesnt require a belief in a supernatural being. I want my heaven to be here on earth. I know your religion tells you that you should tell everyone the good news and help them accept Jesus as their savior, but I think my brain and my family's love is my higher power and I dont need someone to save me from sin. I can be a moral human being without religion."

Best wishes to you on your path towards enlightenment.