did you make up your own religion? if so- describe it. if not- convert me to your pre-existing religion.?

Question

my religion is called The Church of Wilford Brimley's Mustache. we are polytheistic, but our principle diety is Wilford Brimley's mustache. diabetes is our rough equivalent of satan, and our holy sacrament is oat meal.

Answer 1

First Church of Ethical Hedonism.

The doctrine is simple: All else being equal, do what is the most fun.

That 'all else being equal' is the tricky part. It means that you need to consider the real consequences of your actions.

We also had the 2 Suggestions:
1) Question assumptions.
2) Ignore Imperatives.

Answer 2

Well, I'm Norse Folktru Reconstructionist Heathen, technically. And unlike the spendiferous, well, *splendors* of Wilford Brimley's Sacred Moustache (the *orthodox* spelling) (May No Razor Touch It), it's less a matter of my having made it up than it is of my following a highly personalized journey toward reawakening and reconstructing it from historical research and direct spiritual experience.

Sometimes, you can read this book and that book and the other book, and still you just have to try something out to see if it sings for you, and how it impacts your Luck.

Answer 3

Yes and no. I believe that, if there is in fact a God, S/He reaches us each individually, so The Church of Wilford Brimley's Mustache my be directly from God to you... but it isn't directed at me.

Answer 4

I once helped found a new religion called "The Church of Divine Wealth", where we practiced the miracle of 'faith-crippling', by a mere 'laying-on of hands'. (For a small donation, Brother Roscoe would come over with the 'Holy Baseball Bat', and perform the miracle on a person of your choice.) I was the "Freakin' Deacon" of the Church... essentially, the equivalent of the Pope.

Since the Church was loosely rooted in Judeo-Christian dogma, we felt that we were obliged to have some kind of rules; so, we adopted the 'Nine Suggestions'. These were (again... loosely) based on the 'Ten Commandments', even though we thought they were a bit over-restrictive. So, we replaced all references to 'god' with 'tooth fairy' and then we redefined 'adultry' to mean sexual activity between two consenting persons... either adults, or otherwise legally emancipated in their state, city or other applicable political subdivision of domicile. After that, there didn't seem to be anything wrong with it, so we threw it out, leaving nine.

The burden of adhering to the rest in the conventional manner seemed kind of onerous, too... so we changed them from 'commandments' to 'suggestions'. They all still had to be obeyed... one-at-a-time... for a month-at-a-time... in order. In homage to the original ten, though, after you get done obeying the nine, you get a month off... then start over.

We realized that we might still occasionally encounter unpleasant circumstances, and thought it prudent to provide some kind of 'out'... so we devised a 'wild-card'. If you were in the midst of obeying a particular suggestion, and happened to encounter a compelling reason not to obey it, you could play the 'wild-card', and switch to another suggestion, of your choice. But (wanting to maintain discipline), this could only be done once-per-cycle.

For example, if you happened to be doing "thou probably shouldn't covet thy neighbor's wife", and you happened to encounter a neighbors wife that you were inclined to covet, you could switch to "thou probably shouldn't kill anybody this month", instead... without fear of being condemned to hell. (Brother Roscoe is exempt from that one, via 'Special Dispensation' from the Freakin' Deacon.)

Compliance was encouraged via the honor system.

We thought this worked out pretty well, overall. Having made all these progressive changes and improvements, we find that, on average, far fewer of our followers end up in hell, compared to the more mainstream Abrahamic death cults of desert monotheism.

Regarding your imminent conversion... we know where you live, and Brother Roscoe is very impatient.

Answer 5

My religion would have Atheist in charge, Liberals washing dishes, and Democrats and Republicans kissing up to each other. I just described the atermath to the Rapture, silly me.

Answer 6

LOL...
Actually, I DID create my own BDSM religion. It involved redemption by personal crucifixion... I can't really go into details here, though.

Answer 7

I worship pinot noir. Blessed sacrements are drunk each night. Buzz killers are our equivalent of "Satan".

Answer 8

Revelaton of God comes through faith to those who love and seek the truth.

Answer 9

LMAO!