Answer Honestly: Do parents have a favorite child?..... Do my parents favor my sister?

Question

I am the oldest out of 4 kids. I feel like my mom favors my sister (3rd born). She constantly takes the 3rd born's side and won't listen to my side of the story. Every time I talk to her about it --I'm not rude or anything I just tell her how I feel-- I just end up getting yelled at. I'm not bratty or obnoxious towards her (or anyone for that matter) & I get really good grades too.

I don't think this because she gives me more chores and work around the house-- thats not it. She just seems to take the 3rd born's side on EVERYTHING, listens to her more, & she even sometimes has special lunches with her on weekends. My other (2nd born) sister notices it too.

Is it my imagination or is she showing favoritism? Because I don't notice this type of behavior with my dad. For all the parents out there: do you favor a child?

I'm not doubting whether or not she loves me. I'm just questioning whether parents have favorites.... and if my 3rd born sister is my moms.

Answer 1

I am so sorry! Unfortunately, this does happen from time to time! My dad does this very same thing, and it extends into his grandchildren. Please don't try to change who you are! If you don't notice this favoritism from your father, maybe you should try to lean on him more. Hang out with him and know that you are cherished in his eyes! You are special in his eyes, as well as in God's! Please don't forget that!

Answer 2

It may just be that your 3 sister and your mom get along more. Or, if you and your other siblings fight a lot with the 3rd born, your mom may be overcompensating for love if the 3rd born doesnt feel like shes getting any from the rest of you. But if thats not the case, it may very well be favoring. Try to get along with the 3rd born so you 2 wont fight a lot and your mom wont have to take a side. But try not to let it make you feel to bad, be the bigger person and be more mature then them about the whole situation.

Answer 3

I am a parent of two beautiful daughters and I remember when I was pregnant with my second. I worried about favoring one or the other. This was totally ridiculous. A mother's love is not divided between her children; it grows more with each child!
Please remember that mothers are people too. She may not realize what she is doing. She may have, for some reason, bonded with your sister on a closer level. Maybe your sister needs the extra attention. I truly believe that your mom doesn't understand how this is hurting you. She may just think you are whining to get your own way.
I would advise that you write your mom a letter from your heart. Remember, it will take a lot of courage on her part to admit that you may be right. Nobody wants to feel as though they are a "bad mom". Give her some time. Maybe you could end your letter by asking her to lunch, just the two of you, to talk things through.
I wish you, your mom and your sisters the best of luck. I hope you are always open and honest with her. Please remember that a mother loves all her 'babies" dearly!!!

Answer 4

Yes you do but its only because the other children might need you more than the others that doesnt mean you love anyone more than the other only that its easier to be more loving to the one that always offers the hugs and the kisses
and unfortunately we expect more out of the older ones maybe more than we should at times but we are human we are not perfect and its not right to think we should be maybe she feels your sister got the short end of the stick for some reason if your parents are divorced maybe she had less time with your dad and she feels she needs to compinsate for that

Answer 5

A parent favors all there children Sometimes it may seem that they have a favorite And sometimes they do at different times depending on the childs behavior or grades or attitude

Answer 6

As a parent, I hate to admit it, but we can show favoritism sometimes. Most of the time, we don't even realize we're doing it. I would suggest asking your mom for a special lunch with her and it be just you two. Try to talk to her then. If she doesn't want to listen to how you feel, I would try speaking to your father about it.

Just be careful and make sure you make this about how you feel - not how she acts. You don't want to make it sound like you are accusing or attacking.

Good luck.

Answer 7

yes parents do have a favorite even though they don't want to admit to it but their actions is what lets it be known. My mother favors my 2ND to youngest sister. She is always saying how pretty she is how smart, she co signed for a car for her always buys her stuff. I moved out of state when I joined the military and to me it feels better being distant from that because she can do no wrong.

Answer 8

I think some do. I was a middle child with a older sister and a baby brother. How do you compete with that? I felt that my mother treated me differently. I have 2 son's and I try very hard to treat them the same. Even though they are 2 different people. I try to treat them same, but it can be hard. They would probably say other wise. And I admit I have treated them differently at times. But, I let them know I still love them and I support them and encourage them.

Answer 9

It's possible she has a favorite, she's only human you know. But, tell her what you told us and she'll want to make it up to you; she'll probably feel very shameful of treating you this way. If not, keep your head high and be a good role model for your siblings. Your parents love you even if they do have a favorite. You know you're good!

Answer 10

I'm an only child, but why let this bother you so much? The "favoritism" issue might blow over when the 3rd born gets irritated when your mom bothers her some time. I would enjoy your independence while you have it.