In 8th grade I started dating. About 5 months into it he became abusive. It started with names and comments (calling me fat, ugly, etc) and turned into sexual/physical abuse (punching until bruising, causing cuts that bleed)One of my good friends told the social worker and he told the principal. The principal didn't do anything, and I kept pushing for my ex boyfriend to get in trouble. I was soon told that if I didn't stop complaining about him I would get in trouble.
At the time I was suffering from depression and cutting. The principal told me that I was the cause of all the problems in the school. I was also seeing a therapist, and she called the social worker and the principal pretended to be him so she'd tell him what was going on w/ me.
I now suffer from depression, cutting, and severe anorexia.
I have 2 questions regarding this..
1.Am I being over dramatic about something that happened 3 years ago?
2.How much trouble could both of them got into had I taken further action?
2007-08-05 14:40:47 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
I am now a junior in high school, so it happened a few years ago.
2007-08-05 14:54:10 · update #1
no, you're not being over dramatic. you should probably get some professional counseling. you should have reported your boyfriend to the police, it wouldn't have been easy, but it would've stopped him.
as for the school authorities, i am really not sure. but, what they did was very wrong. and they deserved to be reported.
i'm so sorry this happened to you, i know what it's like. no one has the right to treat another person that way. take care of you and get some help. good luck.
2007-08-05 14:45:23 · answer #1 · answered by kiki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. No. Not being over dramatic at all. Seek professional counselling to help you get back to where you can lead a safe and "normal" life
2. Absolutely, a MASSIVE amount of trouble. I am an educator. We are MANDATED reporters of abuse and neglect. Legally, the schools have to report any findings, implications, etc of abuse, so long as there is good cause to believe that it is going on. Unfortunately, you took no further action 3 years ago. Unless you have physical proof such as witnesses, pictures, etc. of not only the abuse (bruises, cuts) but that you told the school officials, I don't think they will be held responsible.
If someone isn't helping you and you are being hurt, you keep going higher until someone listens and helps. Parents> Teachers > Assistant Principal > Principal > Superintendent > Police! Someone will listen. They would have HAD to help you if you went higher and persisted. Also, abuse like that is illegal. It is considered assault.
2007-08-05 14:53:50 · answer #2 · answered by stardust12081 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it bothers you than you are not being overly dramatic! You need to seek a therapist and talk to that person, or even an adult who can steer you in the right direction. Your principal should have never said that to you. My daughter was a cutter, its a rough time in your life. Take a slow moment for yourself and put everything in order....First off, if you are sure it was the principal and he lied about being the social worker, he has broken not only laws of ethics, but privacy laws. To prevent that ever again, tell your school social worker a code that only you will know, and tell your therapist to verify that code before sharing any information over the phone! As for the abusive boyfriend, get away...far away and stay away. If you are smart enough to know that what he was doing is abuse, then please be smart enough to keep yourself safe!!
2007-08-05 14:50:58 · answer #3 · answered by ameribicgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are NOT being OVER DRAMATIC. What you experienced was abuse. As a victim of the abuse, as well as being as young as you were, this boy had power over you.
Likely it was beyond your abilities (it is with most grown women) to stop his abuse or to leave the relationship.
Your principal was unreasonable, and what he did was inexcuseable. If you are not getting over this and 3 years have passed, you need more therapy.
If this boy did sexually assault you against your will, or if you were forced to have intercourse against your will, contact the police and ask your questions. They can give you more accurate answers.
Concerning the principal and school social worker, There are formal proceedures available to file a grievance. Every principal would have a Superintendent as a boss over him. And over them both, is a School Board.
This may be an avenue you would want to pursue. If these people would do this to you, they would also do it to others in the years ahead.
One of my children testified to have a tenured member of the faculty fired. That was the first such firing in our state. If you work with a lawyer, or you hear of others that similar things have happened. It could be benefitial to pursue.
2007-08-05 15:45:11 · answer #4 · answered by Hope 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. You are not being dramatic- i have an anxiety disorder from something that happened TWELVE years ago. You need to see a therapist (give it a shot) and work out your problems.
2. I don't know this one.
2007-08-06 01:11:31 · answer #5 · answered by Ari 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they can get in a lot of trouble... tell you parents about the abuse and your principal.... this is serious!
2007-08-05 14:50:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
you cant ignore abuse tell an authority figur your parents and ther cops ,
2007-08-05 16:47:08 · answer #7 · answered by hurtadomrhurtado 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I Sooo agree with kiki!!!!
2007-08-05 14:51:03 · answer #8 · answered by pink_striped_tiger 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋