What is this? - Help please?

Question

I worry and obsess over things. Example: I write with two friends. One friend has added something to our story that I'm afraid (in my mind, certain) will offend the other friend, since its been a touchy issue in the past. I'm sitting here worrying and obsessing over it until I feel sick to my stomach, and I keep thinking of all the horrible possibilities that may come true- that they'll argue and one or the other will leave our writing circle, that the whole thing will be changed or ruined forever, etc.. I know its not logical for me to worry so strongly over something that hasn't happened yet, and may not happen at all- but I almost feel like if I try not to worry, its sure to happen. And I can't just tell myself not to think about it. It never helps
This happens constantly, with many different things. I've posted questions here before about anxiety disorders, but does this qualify there? I'm so tired of worrying and obsessing over things like this. Right now I just feel miserable

Thanks for the answers- does anyone have any advice about helping me stop worrying right now, about this thing with my friends? Its a terrible feeling and I want to escape it ><

Answer 1

Yes - this qualifies as obsession. If your writing friends are so insecure, then they shouldn't be in a circle. Have you had any help for this condition? Why do you think you can control or predict the feeling or reactions of others? There is help for you. See a psycologist.

Answer 2

Well it sounds to me like the one friend in the writing circle like to stir things up. I'd talk to her about it, no one should be writing hurtful things that will upset someone. Maybe this person is not someone to hang around. I'd talk to the other writer that might be offended and tell her you understand why she is upset and that it was the other girl that wrote the things that upset her. That is if it even does upset her, like you say you might be worrying for no reason. Try not to do this, take each day as it comes and each moment that comes to, yes its ok to be prepared for things that come up, but try not to obsess over it, stay calm think of good things. It might be a good idea to maybe talk to your doctor about getting upset over things that haven't happened and maybe he will suggest something to calm you down. You might have a little anxiety, there are mild meds out there that can help you with this. I hope you get feeling better soon, its not fun being miserable hugs! Von

Answer 3

Set a fixed time limit for worrying about any given problem, for that day: possibly 15 mins. After that, say to yourself: I've considered this in my waking hours; now it is time to put it aside and go on with my life: to do otherwise would be counterproductive to my mental health. Use the technique for reprogramming negative thoughts, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on page 2, if they keep springing to mind. Practise daily, and when needed, one of the relaxation methods on pages 2, or 11, or use Yoga, or Tai Chi. If you like, you can ask for an answer in your dreams that night in bed, and use the mindfulness breathing, or word/phrase repetition, after lights out. In addition, see anxiety treatments, on page 6.

Answer 4

I'm not really qualified to diagnose, especially over the internet, but if anything it sounds like a generalized anxiety disorder. If you're concerned about it, you should contact your doctor/psychologist. There are both medications and other types of therapy that are usually quite effective.

Answer 5

What you are describing is a classic example of Triangulation. The simple way to resolve a triangle is to have your friend tell your other friend what is making you anxious to the point of sickness. However, you don't feel you can, or ought to, do that.

One of the worst feelings is to not have any good options to solve your problem. My guess is you are afraid of losing one of your friends.

My suggestion is to confront the one who wrote the piece that upset you and ask her to settled the matter.

If anxiety has become a problem in your life, please contact a mental health professional and work with them to eliminate your tendency to become obsessed and anxious easily.

Answer 6

Learn how to meditate. It's really easy. Go to the library & get a good meditation CD to start with. After doing it for a while, you won't need any CD's to be able to do this on your own. This will make you feel less stress & also help with the anxiety.

Answer 7

what we often worry about, is what we feel we deserve or expect,seems like you focus on all the bad things about life, just waiting, and expecting things to go wrong, well guess what,if you focus on the bad in this life, that's what you will see in your every day life, instead you should count your blessings, for example: you have two friends,a computer to be able to reach out to others, often we tend to take for granted what we do have and tend to focus on what we could loose or might happen, for all we really have is right now, so enjoy the moment and see the great things you have right now, other wise you'll end up with with nothing!!!

Answer 8

OCD.
My dad has it too. You get obsessive over little things. and you stress alot abou thiings you know you have already triple cheaked. You also are a perfectionest, thats another symptom. See your doctor, they can prescribe some medication to help you relax! Be sure to tell your doctor everything you are feeling.

Answer 9

Worrying is a bad habit, you need to overcome it like any other bad habit. Try to modify the factors under your control, that is the only thing you can do. From http://mshn.org/worry.html

Answer 10

psychotic meltdown, go to the mental hospital immediately