DId having kids change you?

Question

In what way? How were you before having kids?

Answer 1

Completely, yes. It was quite scary at first thinking there was this little person that totally depended on me. All of a sudden, it wasn't just 'me' anymore. I was a mother. I had a massive responsibility which arrived literally overnight! Nothing was ever the same again.

It's made me more mature in some ways, and less mature in others! I feel like I've turned into my mother in some respects, but I am still capable of being completely daft and childish with my kids too. It's fun to be able to let go of your inhibitions like that.

Having my second child changed me even more because he is autistic. Having a child with special needs changes you. It has to. You find energy reserves you never knew you had, and a level of patience and understanding you never had before. Every little bit of progress he makes gives me a thrill like nothing else. My daughter always makes me proud, but when he came along, it gave the word a whole new meaning.

I don't find my life has been hugely restricted. Sure, there are things we used to be able to do - like pop out for a meal whenever we felt like it. Now, we have to get a babysitter, so it's more of a big occasion when we do it. But really, we've found there isn't much we aren't able to do if we put our minds to it. We still have dinner parties, we still socialise, we still have a good time.

I suppose the biggest thing about having kids for me has been that knowledge that there is suddenly someone in the world I would die for without hesitation. Keeping them safe and well is my job, and nothing else is as important as that.

Answer 2

I was a responsiable person before my kids came but I have a more deeper responability now.
I beleive that I have changes in every aspect.
My kids are my life and their is nothing that I wouldn't change for them.
I wasn't a very pateince person at all before they came ,and wow do you need this when you have kids.
life is never the same again. You are no longer able to just about what it is you want but what is in the best interest of my children and how everything I do that will have a big effect on their life.
I think that as a good parent you spend countless nights and hours sitting and thinking of how you can be a better parent and when things aren't going well , you think how did I play a part on this as a parent and how do I fix this so they can grow up to be healthy, responable, loving , repsectful children. A day as a parent is never over even when thye are sleeping and alls quite becasue you are always thinking about the future things to come.

Answer 3

How have I changed?? The list is endless. I was a woman that....

liked sex all the time (not twice a month!),
got lots of sleep,
had boobs that didn't have to be picked up and put into a bra,
Went to the movies
Ate all the yummy biscuits in the house all by myself
Didn't have to exercise
Got to go to the shoppping centres and actually browse through clothes racks
Went on holiday whenever felt like it
Ate dinner at restuarants that didn't have colouring in books and crayons on every table
Never went into the baby aisle at the supermarket

But I never in a million years would I change having my kids for any of that stuff. Except maybe an overseas holiday!
Kids have to change you. You know how you hear the 1st time mums saying that the baby is going to fit into their schedule and everything is planned about babysitters/working/feeding/travelling etc... Hardly any of it works out the way you think and you always work around the baby. From the time the baby is delivered, you will be eating sleeping, cooking, cleaning, shopping, visiting around the babies schedule and most of us wouldn't have it any other way.

Having a baby makes you much less selfish but the catch is when you do take time for yourself you end up feeling guility about it. Its the hardest and most stressful job in the world and can be really unrewarding (they aren't exactly going to say, gee thanks for feeding me, washing me, housing me) at times but well worth the struggle when two tiny arms come and hug your legs and kiss your knees.

Answer 4

Physically, yes. Hips and ribs wider. Lost the baby weight, never got into the pre-baby clothes again, some of them.

Emotionally, big yes. Suddenly there's this person depending on us for everything--food, clothes, shelter, mental development, emotional development, everything. If we do our job of raising this kid right, the world gets a useful member of society. If we blow it, a total drain.

It's the hardest job there is. Your kids take precedence over *everything*, including your marriage, your own health or happiness, and whatever else is important to you. There's a reason so many moms let themselves look frumpy; they realize that looks don't have any bearing on the most important thing they'll ever do with their lives.

Answer 5

Having children changed me a lot. Having children changed my husband more than anyone has ever changed -- that I know of, anyway.

Mainly, he didn't have a full-time, decent job. I waitressed, and he worked at a film developing shop, or part-time at Jason's Deli (we were real winners). Then I got pregnant, and within about a month and a half, he was working full-time (overtime, in fact) at a hard but good-paying job in construction. He got a great reputation there for being hardworking and reliable, and was able to get a full-time job as an apprentice to a piping draftsman, and is now a draftsman at a major company pulling in more money than we would ever have thought possible five years ago.

He just amazes me, and I'm really really proud of him. :-)

Answer 6

I'm way more apt to roll with the punches now. Before, I was pretty well set in my ways. Type-A, neat freak, immaculate house, etc. My chores and work were my priority. Now my son is my priority. I still do the chores and I still work, and my house is still clean, but I am not obsessive about the other things now to the same extent.

It's also changed things from a social perspective. We don't go out to eat or to socialize spontaneously. I think that will change as he gets older, but for now, he's our world. :)

Answer 7

now my kids are my life theey are th most important thing to me as before it was my job and going out to party. I love to me a mother and would not change it for anything in the world!

Answer 8

Oh yes! I am so protective now, even with my friends. Before my daughter was born I experimented and was open to risk. Now I drive below the speed limit, scold unsafeness, and am SO careful all the time. I hate to say it but I am becoming my mother.

Answer 9

I'm still pregnant and shes already changed me!! I dont go out and party anymore, i go to bed at a normal time and get up in the MORNING, I'm kinder to people... the list goes on

Answer 10

yes completely, i am a better person, i am less judgmental, i have a lot more patience, a much better cook, i think i am changed in every way all for the better, i have learned so much more from my children then i could ever teach them