i just graduated from high school and i am facing the biggest decision i have ever had to make. i live have been living with my mom for the last 10 years b/c her and my dad spilt up. Lately i have been bumping heads with her BIG time! it seems like this family isnt for me anymore..like i dont belong here anymore. This summer i visited my dad in California and we had a blast. When im there i feel like im finally home. im happy there. i want to move there and go to college in Cali but he doesnt have any money for me to go so i will have to take out an OUTSTANDING loan to pay for school [$80,000]. But if i stay with my mom she will pay for my college but there are no schools i really wanna go so ill b forced to go sumwhere close to her. so do i got where im happy and can go to college for what i have always dreamed of or do i stay where the money is for my college even tho it isnt my 1st or 2nd or even my 3rd choice in regards to majors. im torn.
2007-08-04 20:31:10 · 9 answers · asked by Jazmyne 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Even though there is money at your moms, the thing you want to major in is not there, but the thing you want to major in is at your dads. This is not a hard decision, I mean, I know it is but lets just say you are looking for the best education, cause thats what you need to survive in this world and it sounds like thats what you want anyway, then thats the path you should take. It's like that in life also, everywhere you turn it's either happiness or money, will you marry a rich man you might be able to love or a poor man who you know you love. Money is nothing to us as humans, we can't take it with us when we die, and our hearts don't even know what money is. I think you should do what your heart tells you, there are programs and all kinda things you can get to pay for college out there, even if you have to work it off, would that be worth it. You need to ask yourself those questions. Good luck in your decisions, I hope you find success and everything you wanted.
2007-08-04 20:46:58 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok... first of all, get a PELL GRANT. Free money from the government given to those in need. No, you don't need to be living in a cardboard box to get it... they give the money to darn near anyone. Granted, they might not give you the full pell, if your dad makes a little bit more money than most, but the government is more than willing to help those who want to help themselves. I got full pell, as a working paramedic (40-42 grand per year gross income in Oklahoma) and it ended up being 4500 a semester.
As far as loans go, before you EVER apply for a private loan, make sure you apply for Stafford or Perkin loan. They are government loans and the interest rate is incredibly low. I mean.. 3-6% kind of low. And you have up to 6 months or so after you graduate to BEGIN paying it back. In the time you were in school, you also incurred no interest, depending on the plan you pick.
Whether you live with mom or dad is entirely up to you. But if you get along with one more than the other, you're an adult, make the decision that makes you happy. But remember that when you say "this family just isn't for me", that is the only family you'll have outside of close friends, and lovers. You don't get to pick your parents. As you will get older, if you make an effort to mature and be level headed, you may become close friends with your mom, who knows. That's how it was with me.
Personally, I would say be with your dad. It sounded like you didnt spend too much time with him before, and now that you have spent some time with him, you two really clicked. Keep in mind that a visit is completely different from living with someone. You may see a side to him that you don't completely like. If you're in a good school, you don't want to bail and go running back to mom.
Remember that you are an adult now. It's time to grow up and start making the hard choices. Get out of your comfort zone from time to time and experience new things. Your education is VERY IMPORTANT!! If you want to do good in life, you're going to have to work hard for it. And it's not always easy.
Good luck! And do well in class!!!
-Desiree
2007-08-04 20:42:35 · answer #2 · answered by SexyMedic911 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go to your dad and study there, there is no reason for you to stay with your mom. But explain everything to your mom. Don't just leave and destroy your relationship with your mom. Regarding the money issue, I am sure that there are scholarships available out there, try to look for them. Worst comes to worst, you have to be a working student. As the saying goes, no pain, no gain.
2007-08-04 22:28:36 · answer #3 · answered by paul 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay with pops if you feel better there and try for financial aide. Most junior colleges have financial aide. Look into it. Dont get all caught up in loans.
2007-08-04 20:34:10 · answer #4 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why don't you discuss your problems with your mom and set the record straight. staying with your mom i think may be the best think because student loans will come to haunt you in the future. they are a burden. you could visit your dad occasionally
2007-08-05 05:41:47 · answer #5 · answered by nino 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how your system works, I'm in Australia. Perhaps you can move in with your dad and work for a few years so you can afford to pay your own fees?
2007-08-04 21:16:53 · answer #6 · answered by Rosie_0801 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can discuss openly with your ,mum and explain your desire and wish that you would like to continue your education for reasons I am sure you have.
Then compromise with one another, I am sure there is a way out for all of you..
take care
2007-08-04 20:36:57 · answer #7 · answered by trymejames 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stay and go to college, maybe you can find one just far enough away that you will not have to live with her except for school breaks
2007-08-08 11:33:18 · answer #8 · answered by cheri h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Decide happiness not money. Money can give you pleasure but NOT happiness.
2007-08-04 21:39:48 · answer #9 · answered by sv 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋