If your parents are mean to you, must you still respect them and obey them?

Answer 1

If your a child what choice do you have

Answer 2

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim - In the Name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful

Hello. It is true that there are many parents in the world today who fall short in raising their children. If you are unfortunate to have a parent who is "mean", you still must do your best to obey them and respect them. You do not have to obey them if they tell you to do something forbidden. You must try to be patient and realize that your reward from God will be great if you bear this with patience.

Now, of course, if a parent is abusive, and this can be physical, sexual, or mental abuse, it is vital that you be rescued from such a situation. It is important for other family members to counsel such a parent and restrain him or her from being abusive. If the abuse doesn't stop, then relatives should raise the children and try to bring about an atmosphere of love and stability. Even in such a bad situation, the child should refrain from cursing the parent, because they have to realize the parent was himself probably abused and has a very sad, mixed up mental state. The best thing that you can do is pray for a parent in such a situation and ask God to heal them and guide them.

I pray to Allah that anyone in this situation will have patience and will emerge whole. Ameen.

Fi Aman Allah,

Nancy Umm Abdel Hamid

Answer 3

It depends on your definition of mean. Are they beating you? Then no, you should not respect them or obey them. Tell somebody. Or are they within their parental boundaries and have rightfully reprimanded you for something and you just don't like it? I'm guessing your implying that your parents abuse you. If that's the case, you don't owe them anything but a phone call to the DHS.

Answer 4

Respect, probably.
Obey, only if you are still under their roof.
My parents aren't very nice people. I don't wish them any harm, but I refuse to spend any time with them either. I'm past the point where I give their opinions any consideration. They don't deserve obedience.

Answer 5

I know this is probably not what you want to hear, but the sad truth is "yes".

Believe me: my father has been SO much less than a model parent to me (lo-o-ong story there) and there was a time when I wouldn't even consider LOOKING at him for the rest of my life, and I was doing everything in my power to hurt him (mentally and emotionally, not physically) because I felt that he deserved it and to hell with the Bible! I laughed every time my friends would tell me that I should at least show respect to my father, whether or not he earned it, because I could never imagine respecting that man after everything he'd done to me -- yet now I find myself actually agreeing with them and making an effort to repair my relationship with my father (as much as he is resisting that effort).

It's something that comes as you heal past whatever it is your parents have done to you, but eventually you will hopefully learn to respect them again.

Answer 6

Last time I checked, the Commandment didn't say "honor your father and your mother as long as they are nice to you". They will be judged on how well they obeyed the Commandments. You will be judged on how well you obeyed them. Regardless of their human weaknesses and failings, keep in mind that your existence is a gift from them to you. What greater gift could anyone give you?

Answer 7

I guess it depends on what you mean when you say that Your parents are mean to you. If they are physically, mentally, or emotionally abusing you then no, Jesus expects you to seek help from authorities or some other adullt you can trust. Jesus wants us to respect our parents but in turn they must respect the gift Jesus gave to them *(their children).

Answer 8

My parents raised me to believe the only way you give respect to someone is if they respect you. Otherwise you are not required to respect them.

It doesn't matter the age of the individual doing the disrespecting.. if he/she is not gonna show it, you don't have to give it... and they believed in it for the relationship we had. I never had a disrespectful relationship with either of them (until my mother left my dad.. then things changed for her and me)

Answer 9

Define mean.

If you are saying they're mean because
1) They're making reasonable objections for you not obeying laws of family such as obeying elders, obeying time of curfew(time to be in house), teaching you lessons of life such as responsibility, value of money, etc they are NOT MEAN, they are teaching you life.

2) If they are disciplining you to learn art of timeliness, organization of your room, keeping your room clean, it is normal of them to teach you good qualiities.(They're doing what they're expected of them as parents).

2) If they're making yelling statements, and telling negative things everytime, day in and day out, or there is any ABUSE(verbal, emotional, physical, etc), then you need to talk to them to "stop their behaviour".

It should be a loving relationship, with respect to elders(and their experience), not a fear towards their exxperience and age. Hope this helps. Be Blessed.

Answer 10

You must "honor" them. You may not respect certain things that people including your parents may do, but you can still honor them as people who have been created in God's image and who God tells you to love. As long as you live in your parents house you have to obey them unless they tell you to do something that God has said not to do.

Answer 11

Depends on how mean. Actual violence is not acceptable. But if they are maybe yelling or get uspset oh well they probably know more than you they have been around the block.