Is there hope for a person like me?

Question

Im 20 years old. Im very( belive me VERY ) selfconscious. And im overthinking everything way too much. So much that im actually lost in thoughts. This selfconsciousness goeas that far that in every possible second i think about negative things, i feel scared and as if there is no cure.I just cant focus at all. I feel messed up and disorganized...and bothered with all of those things that are on my mind.Im completly passive,and when i try to organize my life i dont know where to start, because of this chaos( i cant describe) and i start feeling dizzy. I find something negative in everything in my life. Im veryy suspicious about my bf( of a year and a half) from the beginning although i could say he tries for me. I just cant relax at all, because of this preassure. Its not like im depressed, more kind of confused and powerless. In this country where i am you cannot get a councelor. Will this go by? will i ever become strong? what can i do? any advice? My family is messed up so that

i cannot expect any advice from them. they belive that if one tryes he can overcome everything. Is that true? Also i feel cery weak, and sensible. Can i ever become strong at all? im having aspirations in life, but im afraid that because of this...they will never worlk out. please give me some advice

i cant because where i live psychiatrist are rare, i have no insurance. there are no councelors as far as i know.

Answer 1

There is definitely hope for you! Sometimes we as humans go through time periods, days, or moments where negativety is our auto-answer. It doesn't draw the conclusion that your situation is hopeless, but that you just need a different way of perceiving things. Because if you think about it, negativety is the easiest conclusion to draw in every situation, and the positive is sometimes the hardest to believe. So look for ways, things, and people to incorporate to help in the process of you having positive thought. Surround yourself with positivity, optismist, hope, and faith that things can an will get better for you. And talking always feels nice because you can get off your chest what you feel inside, and once it's out you can finally look at it, and brainstorm on ways to change, alter, or remove. It also sounds as if some anxiety is playing a part in this, so exploring some possibilities on how to supress that may be a good idea. I hope this helps, and things will get better. Believe, work towards it, and receive! :-)

Answer 2

It's ok to be self conscious really. The negative thoughts you have to work on. Ask yourself, "where is the proof" of what I am thinking?

I'm sorry honey but yes you are depressed, you need to see a doctor, in Canada you cannot see councillors without a referral from a clinic or family doctor.

I am assuming that you are not on any anti-anxiety drugs or you would have mentioned. Uncontrolled thoughts racing through your mind and your feeling of helplessness are signs of depression.

See you can't help what others think of you, the only opinion that counts is yours about yourself because you are the only one who really knows you.

Stop telling yourself that you can't, own the fear, because this is normal when you are starting a new venture, a new job....just don't let it overtake you. Ask yourself what is the worst that could happen if this or that doesn't work out.

Is the world going to end, no
Worry is a great cause of much anxiety, I know I suffered from anxiety.

Use this rule, if you are worrying about something that you have the power and ability to change then just do it.

If it is something that is beyond your power to change like "world hunger" for instance then stop worrying and give to some charity and only if you can, don't make yourself feel guilty if you can't.

Pray that God grants you piece of mind so that you can understand the way your mind works and then recognize the symptoms, try and pinpoint to what degree do you get worst, and why. What is the trigger.

All of this is easy to write or say but therapy has thought me that it is very difficult to capture your thoughts, you literaly have to sit and ask yourself why do I feel this way? Then write down what you think are the answers. Don't worry you don't have to show it to anyone.

Also councilors will encourage you to write down your problems on a piece of paper and for some people this works.

Start a journal and write in it every day, even if its just about the weather. This too you keep as a personal tool, you don't have to show anyone a journal is very private thing.

Last but not least set boundaries for yourself, what is ok and not ok in your book. You have the right to your feelings and no one can make you feel like anything, feelings are emotions and you cannot control how you feel, you just do. So don't beat yourself up all the time learn to accept the person that you are,get to know yourself, this will develop confidence in your way of thinking. So you are not right all the time, so what. No one ever is.

Please don't worry about what people think of you. What do you think of yourself, you are a good person right? Leave the people who gossip and judge behind they are not worth your time.

Just be responsible for your actions and make good choices. God bless.

Answer 3

I am not a doctor but I have to say that although you state you can not focus and are unorganized, you did a fantastic job of relating your feeling to us in a well organized and focused description. With that said, I think that maybe you are not as far gone as you suspect.

I too am very selfconcious and lack self confidence and rarely look in the mirror because of what I see looking back, even though I have been told I am very easy on the eyes.

Rather than looking at the negative in your life all the time try to look at the positives. Simple things. Like ....
You are a very fortunante person because you ....

1.)You are Beautiful to someone.
2.)Have a home/apartment/place to live.
3.)You are able to afford many things others can not.
4.)Have access to the web.
5.)You can speak well.
6.) You are obviously educated
7.)You have someone in your life that is sticking beside you even though you say you are suspicious of him.
8.) You are willing to work on seeing yourself differently.
9.) You are not phony and self obsessed.
10.) You think things through before acting on them.

Each time you think something negative try to tell your self 2 positive things about you or your life. Look for things you like.. your hair, your eyes, your toes your ears anything at all. Build yourself up rather than tear yourself down.

Count also the things you have accomplished. Schooling, friendships, travels, learning a program...anything at all that you had to learn to do is an accomplishment...it does not have to be something fantastical like climbing a mountain.
Are you a great friend? Can your friends count on you to be loyal and keep their secrets? That sort of thing is rare these days.

Answer 4

From what you have said it sounds to me that you have some sort of Anxiety Disorder. You seem to have a lot of anxiety and problems putting things together. When people are for example Obsessive Compulsive they can not get things organized enough and get anxious over things in there life that do not seem "right". You can try some coping skills like - deep breathing, relaxation music (water, dolphins,storms), yoga, or any exercise. If this does not work, then you may need to be medicated. Not that you are depressed or crazy, but the meds will help you categorizes things, relax and live day to day instead of acting compulsive over things. I hope this helped!

Answer 5

Why can you not see a councilor? How about a psychiatrist? Consider seeing your doctor and explain how you feel. There are many medications that can help with this sort of thing.

Answer 6

I really know how you fell, but on a smaller scale. As scary as it can be you should go see someone about it. There is hope, you just have to want to do something about it.