Why do some couples "try so hard" to have kids?

Question

I don't get it.

Why do you have to "try"? Why don't you just make love with each other and if it happens, it happens, if it doesn't, it doesn't?

Why are some people so determined to give birth?

If you keep having sex and you don't end up with a baby, then so be it. You can always adopt a baby or child. As far as I know there is no shortage of orphans in the world, and never has been.

Or are these people so egotistical that they must continue "their" DNA?

Answer 1

Maybe some feel empty or unaccomplished if they dont procreate. I dont know, but there are alot that seem to try to hard. I think sometimes that when someone cant maybe they should think about why that is. I remember when I was 19, I was told I couldnt have children. I was sad, but I accepted it years later. Well, now I sit here writing with a 5th child growing inside of me. None of my children were "tried for" or helped.. they were all just pleasant surprises. 2 of which were added to my house by marriage.. but they are my children in my eyes. They are not my DNA, they are my husbands. We may be a blended family but we ALL have the same last name in this house! (Tech this is my 3rd child by birth) If its such a big deal for some to have children, they maybe they should look into adoption first over fertility methods!!! And I do mean adoption within their own country!!! Not like these movie stars that think they look like saints for adopting a child from China or some other third world country. Since they are now adding another person to the national debt here in america & taking a wonderful, loving home from a child that needed it here in their own country!!! That child will now remain parentless & possibly in a foster home all their lives due to a selfish choice someone else made, thinking it was more beneficial & looks better for them to get a child elsewhere!!! Sorry for the ranting on that end there. Have a wonderful day... good question!!!

Answer 2

As much as adopting is a fantastic thing to do for some, its extremely time consuming and expensive. Some people just don't have that amount of time or money to outlay.
Having my own biological children grow inside me and give birth to them, theres just nothing I could compare it to. Its a primal thing. Do animals in the wild just adopt a baby they didn't carry or that is a different species?
Adopting wouldn't give me the same satisfaction, sorry to say.
I didn't "try" for my babies. We just made love when we felt like it and it only took 4 mths both times. I'm not egotistical but having my own DNA staring back at me is pretty special.

Answer 3

I guess that it is possible for some people to be egostical, and to want to have a child to continue their family line. I don't really believe that this is the main reason people want to have children, although, like another person answered, it is most incredible to have a product of your own genes--a human that you helped to bring upon this earth, out of a beautiful love shared between two human beings. Though I don't have children of my own, I am a teacher, and I see the reflection of parents (mothers especially) in their children's eyes, and the beauty of the complete and unconditional love that they share for one another, even in times of trial.

As someone who is married, and hoping to conceive, I can say there are many reasons for wanting to have a child, and all of them connect and relate to one another in such a way that it is an almost indescribable sensation to feel. I do yearn to feel a life growing inside of me. I dream of seeing the light in my husband's eyes when our baby takes his first breath, and what it will be like to hold my child for the first time, and to hold its tiny little fingers, and stroke its tiny little cheeks.

But there is a deeper part of me still, that hears the blessing offered by God in Genesis to Adam and Eve, "God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground." (Genesis 1:28) Not so much a command to the humans of earth, but a blessing to help bring new life to the earth as the fruit of our bodies.

I've heard it said that there is no deeper love than a mother for her child, and I can only assume by the love that my parents had shown me that this is true. Though you can love an adopted as your own, I've seen it happen times before, there is no reason to give up trying. You never know when a miracle might happen.

And lastly, I can say from experience that couples trying to conceive can have a great time with it, enhancing their relationship and their sex lives, while making love for love--and without pressure.

Answer 4

Its nothing about continuing their DNA//RNA. I have had fertility issuses and have been ttc for 3 years now. I would never wish infertility on anyone, but this is a very arrogent question. One that you can not even understand until you have been in the position that I, and millions of others are in. It is very painful and very very hard. Even though you write this in ignorance, I wish you all the luck in the world.

Answer 5

it is darwins law . so every living being loves its own young one's.. nothing rwrong in it provided it is in control & u do not go on to produce 10 or more. also it is a disturbing trend for the world, that the societies that u want to grow, have low fertility, & those u want to be restricted invariably have super fertility, without knowledge. so they end up at 10 or close to it.

Answer 6

we just LOVE sex