So say you live with a roomate and he brings a friend over to hang out that he met on myspace. as far as you know he is just coming over to chill and go home, next thing you know he is staying the night. Ok I can deal with that. the next morning you find out oh by the way he's going to chill at the house all day by himself while both of the rent payers are at work. So you get home from work only to find out that he's staying the night again, and maybe leaving the next day. All this would normally be fine execpt for the fact the one roomate doesn't think it is at all nessasary to consult the other on any of it, or even bother to give a heads up on whats going on with this stranger thats been living with us for 2 days now. Is it a little messed up or am i crazy I mean if you want to do what ever you want and not consult anyone get your own apartment right? tell me what you think. thanks!
2007-08-03 18:27:57 · 19 answers · asked by solidroc3224 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I would definitely be worried. Not only is this rude of your roommate, the guest is a complete stranger and should not be left alone in your apartment. He could be stealing from you, or hacking into your computer, or any number of things. This is sending up so many red flags I can't believe it... kick both him and your roommate out now, and change the locks!
2007-08-03 18:31:19 · answer #1 · answered by Rat 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Without a doubt, you should have been consulted about the "visitor" before he even came there. Your roommate should have asked if it was OK before inviting a stranger to stay the night, because he's placed both of you in a dangerous situation.
Neither of you really know this guy, you only know what he's said on the Internet and we all know that could all be BS. You need to have a straight talk with your roomie and get your boundaries clearly set so you both know what is and isn't acceptable. This scenario definitely isn't acceptable and anyone with a tiny bit of common sense would know that.
2007-08-04 01:57:00 · answer #2 · answered by xanjo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a really good illustration of why housemates should work out 'Rules' before something like this comes up!
Common courtesy would seem to suggest your room mate could speak to you and explain that he'd like his new friend to hang around, but as long as you are concerned about your own safety and security, I don't see that it is OK to give a stranger permission to be alone with your property all day. At least, not without disxcussion.
Luckily, it seems like this new myspace buddy is OK ~ nothing is missing and you are still alive.
But it IS time to talk to your room mate, and let him know that if he intends to bring strangers home for long visits in future, you'd like the respect of some prior discussion, or he (or you) will have to start thinking about a new room mate.
Good luck and best wishes! :-)
2007-08-04 04:10:46 · answer #3 · answered by thing55000 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yikes, that is no fun at all. First, your roommate is totally wrong in not discussing this with you. Secondly, if he wants to have a friend over and not consult you then the friends limits are to stay in the roommates bedroom; NOT have free roam of the house and common space that you both pay for.
Lastly and most importantly .... it is absolutely INSANE to leave someone at your house that you barely know without anyone being home.
This is nuts. You should talk to your roommate and if he doesn't agree move out and get a new roommate.
2007-08-04 01:31:32 · answer #4 · answered by ValleyR 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you already know the answer to your question:
"I mean if you want to do what ever you want and not consult anyone get your own apartment right"
Now the real question is when are you going to tell this to your roommate.
2007-08-04 01:46:00 · answer #5 · answered by Patrick 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel VERY uncomfortable to have a stranger staying at my place for even one night.
Who knows if this is a person who will steal your possessions? Who knows if this person is a risk to your personal safety?
What your roommate is doing is frightening and wrong on so many levels. Doesn't he know that you can't just take in strangers that you meet over the internet?
2007-08-04 09:29:41 · answer #6 · answered by nowyouknow 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If i had a roommate that did this i would pull such roommate into a room for a discussion and inform said roommate that for all they know this person is a junkie, a thief, a child molester, or a killer and until said roommate gets to know this person in real life, nobody is spending the night and putting my life in danger or getting me involved in any activity that i may not want to deal with. If roommie wants to spend the night with said person, let them go to "their" space and do it.
2007-08-04 11:55:41 · answer #7 · answered by pj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One best thing to do is to rent for another apartment without a roommate so that you will not be messed with your privacy, if you can afford. if not, be honest and talk to your roommate. tell him that the situation is bothering you already.. Be tactful in talking to him in order to prevent any misunderstanding and confrontation. Anything can be settled in a good conversation...
2007-08-04 01:55:15 · answer #8 · answered by Jay R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him know that he isn't the only one in the apartment and there's a reason why you two have to pay the rent. also tell him that you don't feel comfortable leaving someone there that you dont know. kick out the myspace guy.
2007-08-04 02:46:16 · answer #9 · answered by van7315 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i at least think you should have been asked if it was ok before he went ahead............. anyhow house guests are like fish......... they go off in a few days........... tell your roomies you are paying the rent too and you don't want him hanging around. If they don't like it they can move out.
2007-08-04 01:31:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋