What was the last straw for you?

Question

I've tried so hard to be calm and collected throughout all the wedding planning, but as every bride knows, it gets stressful.

The last straw for me, that made me break down in tears was my FMIL leaving me an unkind message about not getting all of "her" invitations out - 3 weeks before the wedding! I just started sobbing because I've been planning this whole thing by myself, and I'm doing the best I can.

Anyway, I feel bad for letting it get to me, and I was just wondering if anyone else let the stress get to them?

Answer 1

Absolutely! Wedding planning is extremely stressful, and no matter who you are or how hard you try, something is always going to get to you and upset you. My last straw was at my rehearsal. My step mom who has been in my life since I was 2 swore she wouldn't come to the ceremony if she wasn't seated last instead of my own mother. I couldn't believe she would put me in a place like that the night before my wedding day! Just a really horrible situation! Good luck with everything though, it will all work out fine! Hubby and I have been married almost 4 years now and had a wonderful wedding!

Answer 2

Poor thing. I wish I could help you with your planning. I understand your stress, don't let you FMIL stress you out. Besides, it's not up to her who to invite. This is YOUR WEDDING. Not hers! the nerve of her. My best advice is to take a day off from this planning to relax your mind & put yourself at ease b/c you can't make good decisions if your stressed out & being pushed by others. Stay positive & think about your future husband, think good thoughts. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day :)

Answer 3

The wedding planning was very stressful and even the wedding day itself for the both of us. Being told what you should do is hard to deal with but just remember that this whole thing is for YOU and to do what is best for you as a couple. Don't worry about what everyone else wants. Enjoy yourselves.

Answer 4

I think JWilridge wins this one but I'll answer anyway.

For me it was when my SECOND bridesmaid backed out. A bm backed out after she got engaged b/c she had to plan her own wedding so I asked another friend to replace her.

This friend was Ms Drama Queen, wanting me to pay for everything. First she lied & said she ordered her dress. I had to guess her measurements last minute. Then she lied & said her ears were pierced, then after I bought earrings wanted me to pay for them to be made as clip-ons. I looked for clip-ons for weeks! Then a few weeks before the wedding she hadn't bought her plane ticket (she used the money to fly her ex boyfriend), so I spent weeks looking for the lowest fare & calling her 'rents if they would chip in & help her. Found her a flight at $300 cheaper. She demanded my MOH change my hen party, free lodging and that her ex-bf be invited. Then she tells me she won't fly in until during the rehearsal & I need to pick her up--AND she won't get her dress altered unless I pay a seamstress to work all through the night!

I lost it and while I was in the process of figuring out what to say to this evil witch who is clearly not my friend--she writes me an email and says she is backing out. Nothing more, no reason after I've spent all this time looking for her flights and money. Just a "not coming" one liner 2 weeks before wedding. I called my MOH, cried for about 4 hours, then my fiance walked in & I was so upset he thought someone had died or the reception hall had burned down. Then I drove to tell my mom for another 2 hours of yelling & screaming.

Yeah completely lost it. However after that I realized whatever else will go wrong, will & there is nothing I can do about it. So I better calm down & stay as stress free as possible. In your case, your FMIL was only in charge of her own invites so if the people don't get them in time--its her family not going to make it. I'd just call them next week just as if they were people who didn't RSVP, ask if they were coming. If they mention not getting an invite, I'd just say "That's so odd. FMIL was suppose to mail them weeks ago. I'm sorry you didn't get it/won't be able to attend" (as if you had no idea what they are talking about).

Answer 5

I just got married last month. When I saw my wife started to crack with the planning pressure, I planned a weekend junket to get us out of planning mode, out of stress mode and focus on what everything was about -- The two of us spending the rest of our lives together.

I can't say that I understand the stress, because I kept in mind that it was always about us and no one else's opinion mattered about the day.

I can only suggest to communicate your concerns and hopefully your future husband will pick up on it and show that the event is just a warm-up for the real show -- a lifetime with you!!

Answer 6

Don't feel bad. wedding planning is not easy. I have gotten to the point where I have cried as well. It seems like your doing all the work, and no one appreciates it. I have been known to bite my fiances head off a few times as well. I guess it's just the bridezilla factor. I can't wait for all to be over. I just want to be married already....

Answer 7

Mine was my MIL as we were over at their house trying to plan our menu for the reception and she laid into me and said i had a diamond taste on a kool-aid purse. well i had it and i told her that she has no idea how much our wedding actually cost and that i was tired of her bitching at me and for her to plan the meal by herself and i got up and left. well she did me dirty ofcourse and had her sister and her nieces cater our wedding of sandwiches, chips and pickles. I kid u not it was the worst reception i had and it cost them a whopping 300.00 for 250 people . so figure the price per head. but then i married in the southern bible belt, and my inlaws are southern hillbillies who didnt graduate high school and never made it out of middle school so they didnt know better. tell your mil how u are feeling and ask her to help u get the invites out it wont kill her to share some of the work instead of griping about it. tell her also she hurt your feelings very bad and that u dont appreciate being treated like a secretary instead of her future dil. good luck and hope this helps

Answer 8

I'm confused. Did she invite people you didn't expect? Or was she just sending invites to the family on her side that you DID have on your list? Or did you give her the job of sending out all the invites?

If she was just sending out her family invites, then if anyone complains, just say to them "Oh, I know I felt horrible when FMIL said she hadn't sent them out until 3 weeks ago....but I guess she didn't consider it a priority." Then watch them go find HER.

Answer 9

My MIL said she wanted a corsage with 9 roses. Hello - that's a freaking bouquet, not a corsage. I sent her 20 bucks in a card and told her to buy her own damn corsage. I shouldn't have done that, I don't recommend, but I was young and totally and completely pissed off at that point. We're talking about a woman who wore a white wedding gown to my wedding.

Answer 10

I think the last straw was when my fiance missed our last meeting with the pastor. Thats all it took. I was so stressed from everything that I just lost it at that point. It's ok, hopefully it's almost over, I have 15 more days.