Im jealous of a new baby! what should i do?

Question

Only yesterday me and my older brother [14] and my younger twin sisters [10] found out that my mom was pregnant. I had to act really excited because my mom looked soo happy and i didnt want to let her down. Im worried that when we have family over, the new baby is going to get all the attention. I cant help being jealous and i cant tell my mom about it because i dont want to upset her. What should i do? Just keep it a secret and stay angry or let myself go and possibly hurt someones feelings?

Answer 1

jealousy is a very destructive, thing, hon....

your mother won't love you any less because there is another child on the way. in fact, it seems you have a big family now.

babies do take extra time, but you'll probably fall in love with the baby, given time.

i think the best thing to do is to be kind to YOURSELF... sometimes we have to accept things and move on. it won't do you any good to be angry. anger makes us physically and mentally unwell.

if you have an adult (relative or friend) to talk to that might help as well. sometimes we need someone to listen.

take care.

Answer 2

Try to get excited about it too. Go shopping with your mom, get the room ready, help her pick out a name, etc. This will give you and your mom some quality time for the next few months, and hopefully you will forget all about the feelings of jealousy. Since your family already includes 4 children, you won't be the only one feeling left out. Just be happy for your new addition, and soon the "cute baby phase" will pass.
The baby may be the one getting the attention now, but soon you will be getting your license and graduating. Your younger siblings may be a little jealous when you start getting the attention because of your big life events.

Just try to stay positive, because negativity will only make everyone around you miserable, as well as yourself.

Answer 3

Don't keep it inside because the jealousy will buld up. It's good that you are posting this on Yahoo! Answers because you have to tell someone. But, you should tell your brother and sisters. And ask them how THEY feel about it. Also, wait until this new baby is born, you may feel just as excited and happy as your mom. It probably seems that you're going to be left in the dark, but you don't know for sure and neither do we. Let nature take it's course and let everything fall into place. Best of luck and don't give up on hope.

Answer 4

The new baby will get a lot of attention. It's a baby. That same way you got a lot of attention when you were a baby.

This does not mean your parents will love you any less. They aren't going to put you out in the doghouse to give the new baby your room.

Just remember, this is your brother or sister on the way.

Answer 5

Babys do require a lot of attention but it will get the same amount of attention you got when you were its age. I doubt you really want this baby to be neglected and sad all the time. Babies cant do anything for themselves and rely on others to do it for them. They are at the mercy of the people around them. Think how you would feel if one of those people were jealous and didnt want you to get what you needed. You would be very sad.
You are going to have to grow up a little and learn to share and show love. I think once you hold this baby your jealous feelings will go away.

Answer 6

Hopefully you will get over that feeling. You are kind of old for that kind of behavior. Anyways, the baby will be innocent & you will love the baby. You seem old enough to be honest with yourself right now about it.... so , don't say anything to your mom right yet.
I think the feelings will subside, like I said. Youjust found out... give it some time.

Babies are special. You will see that again, very soon. You can be very involved in the whole process of shopping for the baby & helping out. And if it gets to be too much, just talk to your mom about it... in a mature manner, that is!!!

Answer 7

What you should do is realize that what you are feeling is not anger. It is normal to feel this way. Once the baby is here, you will enjoy it too. But for now all you can see is how much you will have to sacrifice. If your parents and family don't do a good enough job of including you once the baby is here, then express your concerns nicely. You don't have to get ugly about it.

Answer 8

talk to mom... it might upset her, but she can also help you work out your feelings. if possible get involved in the preperations for the new baby, as well as gooing to appointments with her would probably help too.
When i got preg with my youngest i was afraid that my other child would feel the same way you do...i got him involved as much as i could and jealosy hasn't been an issue...yet (agaes 6 and 2). It's a hard thing to deal with, but you kind have to...a new born baby needs a lot of attention he/she can do nothing on their own. If talking to mom is not an opion talk to another adult family member.

Answer 9

It's normal, but you have to understand that it is her baby, not yours. It doesn't give you an excuse to go get pregnant because you think you will get a cute one like that. They raised the baby and it's a lot of work. They could be underexaggerating when the baby cries to make him look more like an angel. Don't get pregnant please. Jealousy is normal though, but dont let it go too far.

Answer 10

It can be a big change when a new baby joins the family. Babies turn the whole house upside down! But I don't think you'll stay angry about it for too long. In fact, you might enjoy having a baby around! When I was 12, the lady next door to me went to jail for some reason, and her husband asked us to babysit their little boy, who was just a baby. I was homeschooled that year, and thought for sure my mom was going to be SO busy with the baby (and my dad loves babies, so he would be ignoring me too) that I wouldn't get any attention at all! How was I supposed to do my homework with nobody helping me learn the concepts? How was I gonna have anyone to talk to when they were both making dumb googly faces at the baby? How was life ever gonna be enjoyable with that smelly thing around? But it actually turned out to be a great experience for me!:) The baby became a sort of "home economics project" for me! My mom did most of the work, but she used it as an opportunity for me to learn how to care for a baby. We had this kid at our house pretty much ALL day, so aside from being woken up at 2am, it was much as if she'd just had a baby! I ended up becoming REALLY attached to Daniel (the baby) and when their family moved a couple states away, I was sooo sad:'( He had even started to call me mommy, and I had to teach him my name so that when his mom came home (she was innocent, so we weren't handing him back to a bad lady) he would learn to call HER mom. I started out thinking I would hate having him around, but ended up LOVING it. It was a huge learning experience for me, and as it turned out, I got a ton of attention because in order for me to help, my mom had to help me know what to do. My mom and I both miss that year. Daniel is 9 years old now, and he still sends us drawings:') I hope that experience helped me to be able to be a good mommy someday:)