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I'm an Atheist, so this is an academic question on my part, but I feel that we all have regrets that we would like the chance to redress. So, what do you think? Suppose God gave you a chance to change one thing in you life---what would you do?

For me, I would change the fact that I haven't been a part of my daughter's life, and now it's probably too late. This has been my biggest singular failure in life.

This question and the accompanying regret has been brought to you courtesy of Jack

2007-08-02 15:13:48 · 38 answers · asked by Jack B, sinistral 5 in Society & Culture Religion & Spirituality

38 answers

I have sometimes wished that I was a robot. That way I could just program the things that I want to accomplish, and I could complete my “to do” list without any emotion or desire getting in the way. Then I could go throughout life without worrying about my free will being influenced or getting sidetracked by my decisions to take the “easy road.” It is sometimes too easy to make choices that are based on convenience and instant gratification that inevitably result in long term harm to myself and others. I have often thought that life would be easier if I could just program decisions based on long term benefits and consequences, and then everything (including just plain getting up in the morning) would be much simpler.

But then I take a hard look at my shortcomings, and I realize that they are an integral part of who I am. I would not be “me” without my shortfalls, and I will also lean on the old cliché that the pain that I have suffered, due to my poor decisions, and the decisions of others, can eventually result in good, no matter how bad that they may be. It is all part of a path that we must follow, and do our best to help others along the way. I just don’t think it would all be worth it, if life was too easy of a path, and everything was just handed to us, without our earning it. It would not make much sense to me.

As for my mistakes, I am already working on what I will tell my children when they grow up, and accuse me of being a lousy excuse for a father. It is almost a right of passage. When I was a young man, I railed against my father for a time (he was and is a great dad by the way) and I’m sure that if I ever have grandkids, that they will accuse my children of being lousy parents eventually. As far as being a parent goes, I just try to do my best, but I know that I will inevitably fall short.

A great question for sure, and I could go on, and on. But I am me, with all of my mistakes included, and that’s the way it’s supposed to be, so I try to be at least somewhat O.K. with how my Creator made me.

2007-08-04 17:30:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4 0

I'm a Christian. I got pregnant in high school. I gave birth to my son a month before I graduated. I attended a nice college prep school, and this was the FIRST time this happened. They let me walk because they had no rules against a pregnant student attending and graduating. I still regret being stupid, because I knew it was wrong. I wasn't raised to be a Christian, but I knew having sex was wrong. I had a few sscholarships lined up to play college basketball. I'll admit, sometimes I still think about them. I wonder what it would be like. But God has fulfilled me. It's been three years since I had my son. I'm married with two children and have a wonderful Godly husband. I know you don't believe in God. But after the physical, spiritual and emotional transformation from who I am today and who I was.... I can only attest to having a heavenly Father. And I WOULD NOT CHANGE ANYTHING FOR THE WORLD. It took God breaking me down, to build me up.

2007-08-02 15:30:20 · answer #2 · answered by Marian G 1 · 2 0

If I had the chance to change just one thing, it would be to be more like His son, Jesus! Then, I would be full of more love and compassion for others and more wisdom and righteousness to avoid making all of the foolish mistakes I've made throughout my life and the many yet to come. Thus, I would be more pleasing to Him, too.

And I agree that it is never too late to become a part of your daughter's life!! I have two, myself, ages 4 and almost 7 and they are the most forgiving and loving human beings I've ever known. I'll bet your daughter is the same way. Get to know her! You won't regret it if you try, but you will if you never do. Blessings...

2007-08-02 15:46:46 · answer #3 · answered by blessed1 3 · 1 1

First of all, I agree with all the others that answered before me, it's still time for you and your daughter! However difficult this might seem, go for it, the only regret you can have is not to keep trying. :)

If I could change one, and only one thing about my life, I would have worked more, and harder, so my parents would be having a much easier and better life, now.

2007-08-03 03:24:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

Jack, in a world full of people wanting to win the lottery or gain promotions, that's got to be--bar none--the best wish anyone would make.

I honestly wouldn't change anything in my own life. Now, before calling me arrogant (bite your tongue!) it's not that I'm saying that I have a perfect life. I don't. I've got bills to pay, and the constant fear that the next CAT scan is going to show something funny (read my profile). But my wife has proven her worth to me ten thousand times over by sticking with me through the trials of endless cancer treatments (okay, you don't have to read my profile anymore) and their side effects.

She's got a growing bump in her belly. We're going to call that bump, Piper. It's a girl! We did in vitro, and it took. So my bills--once a source of worry--now serve to keep me focused: I've got a family to provide for.

You just can't live my life without making lemon aid from life's many lemons!

So I think I would give that gift to someone less fortunate. I think I'd give it to that person who had a questionable CAT scan today. Or that person who has been told there's nothing medical science can do for them at this present point. Me? I'm doing fine.

2007-08-02 15:37:00 · answer #5 · answered by writersblock73 6 · 4 0

There is a worse regret you could have Jack. To let your daughter get to the age you are now, and having her regret be that her father stopped trying. It's never too late to make amends. I don't know your situation, but I'd bet she wants to know you, and she needs your love manifested in her life. It would be a rare child that didn't.

2007-08-02 16:04:21 · answer #6 · answered by . 3 · 7 0

We think we can change something (maybe one circumstance) and we hold on to the idea that it will change our life.. but we really can't be that certain can we Jack? The decisions we take and the decisions taken from us shape our future, but these decisions do not necesarily change our fate. There are obvious things you know, that I would change but I wonder whether it wouldn't have occurred later, regardless.

I lament your regret on your behalf, Jack, but it is never too late for you, mate.

2007-08-02 19:30:41 · answer #7 · answered by Icy Gazpacho 6 · 6 0

Nothing, you can't just change one thing in your life. Everything you do affects everything else. Whatever you think you would "go back and change", you can change now. Its never too late to try. Especially with a child.

2007-08-02 15:17:16 · answer #8 · answered by ~mj~ 3 · 0 0

I think I would change how long I put up with my abusive family. It took me a long time to realize that some people are just toxic and you have to speak up against it and take care of yourself. I would have walked away at a much younger age than I did.

2007-08-02 17:20:18 · answer #9 · answered by hypno_toad1 7 · 3 0

I would love more, forgive faster, and and control my tongue.
It is never too late to make amends for a relationship that matters to you. Whether or not you are received well, she will always know you tried. You don't seem like a quitter to me. Ya gotta love a guy who just throws it out there for all to see. Transparency is a beautiful quality.

2007-08-02 16:08:04 · answer #10 · answered by One Wing Eagle Woman 6 · 4 0

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