Lately, I've been feeling like my boyfriend is hurting my feelings, and thinking nothing of it. He can tell me something really mean, and he knows it is mean, and when I get hurt, he shrugs it off as I'm "too sensitive". Yet, when I tell him something or even try to talk to him about a problem, he immediately gets defense, blames me, and it turns into a "fight" rather than a "talk". Can anybody else relate or give me advice?
2007-08-02 08:57:09 · 21 answers · asked by Lita 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
your boyfriend is obviously insecure. you cant blame all men for that..
2007-08-02 08:59:20 · answer #1 · answered by BrightEyes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We dont have double standards, we have no more than the women do! Ditch his a ss this is what he wants, find someone who will respect you just as much as you respect the other guy. You 2 are looking for a way out of the relationship or at least he is for the most part. When we get to fighting often over petty or serious things and it becomes repetative/daily its a good sign that one or other wants out!
2007-08-02 16:08:26 · answer #2 · answered by Jerry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate. My wife does the same thing, and I think it isn't a guy thing but a girl thing. Maybe it is a human thing and we all hurt others feelings without meaning too, but we are all also sensitive to when others hurt our feelings. It is the whole deal about everybody is at least a little self centered. It's just human nature. Just realize he doesn't mean to hurt your feelings, and let him know you didn't mean to hurt his, and you'll be fine.
2007-08-02 16:01:17 · answer #3 · answered by Tim S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A relationship is about building trust. There has to be two-way interaction. It sounds as if your boyfriend doesnt want to really think about really listening to what he is saying to you. If you are not careful he will turn this into a control thing. Dont let him control you, go by your own inner instinct. You are not to blame, he is. I think there is a better person out there for you, in fact just around the corner-you may have met your future husband already!.Get in control, dont let him control you.
2007-08-02 16:04:59 · answer #4 · answered by cornishmaid 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him. You don't need a guy who is putting you down. I had one of those, my life was a whole lot more stressful than it should have been. Tell him that you are sick of it!
superchic[k] song... it's so true.
Maybe he'll change
Maybe things will get better
Maybe it would be nice
If he wouldn't always put you down
Maybe things will work out
But maybe they'll never
And I think that you've given him
The benefit of the doubt
You need that boy like a bowling ball dropped on your head
Which means not at all
You have too much to give to live to waste your time on him
You need that boy like a bowling ball dropped on your head
Which means not at all
You have too much to give to live to waste your time on him
Maybe he'll change
If you could be better
But maybe it's not your fault
He's checking out the waitress now
But someday you'll change
One day you're stronger
And you will have changed enough
And it's time to get out
2007-08-02 16:01:05 · answer #5 · answered by dollygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have u tried to talk to him about the whole sensitivity thing. if you have and it have not help to where to just joke around with it. just look him straight in the eyes and tell him that your serious about getting your feelings hurt. and if he's gonna turn the conversation into something about him than he's not the kind of guy that your looking for.
2007-08-02 16:29:37 · answer #6 · answered by lisa B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rather than living at the mercy of his behavior, you should try making yourself little hard and strong.
If you think you are sensitive, you would spend your lifetime asking people to be soft towards you. Better is to develop a shell around you and don't care too much of him if he finds it too difficult to understand you.
If he loves you by heart, he would understand you and would never thinking fighting with you, consider my first two paragraphs of advice, they are important
2007-08-02 16:15:25 · answer #7 · answered by Goldman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once he knows what hurts he will use it against you if he is a mean person. Not all guys are like that, and who needs him when the next guy will be a doll.
2007-08-02 16:00:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well to start off... you probly already know that guys and girls think two different ways.
guys think with their minds
while girls think with their emotions.
which causes alot of problems when it comes to communication.
soo you just have to find different ways to get your point across that he will understand.
its all just a big communication error.
he doesnt understand why those things hurt you because he doesnt think that way, and he isnt thinking about the fact that you think with your emotions.
when it comes down to it.... you guys just need to be more understanding of eachother.
good luck.
2007-08-02 16:02:14 · answer #9 · answered by poets_loss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, i can give you advice and even relate to you.
he isn't that into you anymore, so he chooses to disregard your feelings... he shrugs things off as if you don't mean anything to him -- and maybe he's too much of a COWARD to break up... so is mean instead?
maybe break up with him. you don't deserve to be treated like that, hon.
2007-08-02 16:01:02 · answer #10 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you two just aren't a good match. Someone who really cared about you wouldn't say unkind things and make it your issue that the words upset you. Think about it.
2007-08-02 15:59:37 · answer #11 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋