Why should you wait til marriage to have sex if you really love that person.?

Question

I was born and raised in church but i dont understand why people say wait til marriage to have sex.

What does it say in the bible?

I do have sex but i dont have sex with any and everybody i meet. I have morals and self respect i just dont understand whats wrong with sex before marriage.

Please tell me how you feel about it and what the bible says about it!

Thank you!
~Michelle

The guy i am having sex with now is the guy that i want to spend the rest of my life with. I love him more than anybody in the world.

Answer 1

I would not wait, that is like buying a very expensive pair of shoes without trying them on first.

Answer 2

I know that it is cliche. The reason that they say get married, is because sex changes everything. Women like to change the rules of the game in the middle of the game. If you had sex with him before marriage, what is the point in getting married after? What reasons do you have for marriage? Being a part of the church means that the sex is sanctioned by GOD. Your relationship would be considered tainted by GOD. Don't be in a hurry. If you wants to have sex with you, he should marry you. That is basically leasing a vehicle as opposed to buying it. Make the committment. Morals and respect does not go hand in hand with casual sex. casual sex is a self worth issue. It is validation from someone else that you are valuable. When GOD created you, you became extremely valuable. Did you know that every time you sleep with someone, you sleep with anyone else they have slept with? What if you meet this really great religious guy that is a virgin. Would you expect him to accept you?

Answer 3

I don't think it's a major biblical issue, although feel free to correct me if you can cite the verse. The types of things I've heard just relate to the effects it can have on your eventual marriage or long term relationship. Say you've hed several boyfriends and had great sex with some of them. Then you meet that "man of your dreams" and hook up, but the sex isn't so great. If you had no prior experience you wouldn't know, and would just learn together. With experience, you're more likely to dwell on the sex with those other fellas, or see it as a deficiency in your mate.

Still, in this day and age I don't see any reason the woman can't take the lead and teach the fellow. I think that would just depend on how he was approached.

I'll think on it, but the only applicable quotations I can think of are cautions not to become addicted to lust, fornication, and sins of the flesh. There are similar cautions against many other things, such as money. I think they all pertain to keeping the first commandment, not anything major about sex.

Answer 4

Because Love does NOT mean SEX. Sex is something that brings kids in the future and that means building a family. I know what you mean, but i was taught so much about the bible that i feel i should tell you this. Sex happens right after a woman loses her virginity, and the VIRGINity is something sacred that should be lost on her wedding night if not after. It should be with the guy who will respect you enough to wait and with the guy who will spend the rest of his life with you

Answer 5

Believe it or not, the bible doesn't say as much about abstaining from sex as you might think. I recently read that it says little on that matter. It was the people running the various churches who decided that sex and the human body in general are to be ashamed of and avoided. That is why so-called virginity was supposed to be so admired by us all. They said that Jesus' mother was a virgin, even though she had several children and was properly married. The Catholics even awarded sainthood to a teenage girl in Italy who died while "defending her honour" from a man in the village who was making unwanted advances toward her.
If God had decided that sex was evil, then he would not have made it such a strong urge. We get hungry - we eat; we get thirsty - we take a drink. We get a sexual itch - we have to scratch it.
Don't let this become a major problem for you. You are just doing what our nature as humans directs us to do. Don't worry about it.
Good luck.

Answer 6

You have to remember that the bible was written by men and has changes many time as well. I was raised in a church going family as well and asked my self that too, when younger. I think that someone should wait until they are ready and are with some one that they won’t have any regrets with. And that could be with the person that they end up marrying or not. What I came to the conclusion is am I not bc I don’t want to or am I bc I am being tolled not to & that something bad will happen to me?

Answer 7

You should wait so that you know the person is really serious about being committed to you. I think moving in with someone falls along those lines too. Be married first, because it becomes to easy NOT to get married after awhile.

The Bible says that a man and a woman should be married before they have sex. It's a good idea to pay attention to that because a lot of men will trick you into thinking they are serious about you just so they can have sex with you. This way you know you are in a healthy relationship.

Answer 8

Hey Michelle..... I waited until I was married because like you I was raised in the church and my parent's were pretty conservative about such things. Anyway... the Bible is pretty clear about it. Fornication is the word it uses, which basically means any sex outside of marriage. Here's the passages I remember the most.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 & 1 Corinthians 7:1-2

"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband."

Answer 9

i think the bible says some things that are in there views thats whats right. some times i dont get it.

but to wait to have sex till your married is questionable now and days.

i heard you could wait to have sex and then the first time you do, some ppl i heard end up not liking there sexually relation. and end up divorced. now i dont know the stats o it but it happens.

then in other cases there are some ppl that have sex before they get married but when they do get married they have less sex, and the other spouse or someone feels left out and starts to find sex elsewhere. and another divorce.

i personally agree with getin to know the person first and live with them first for lik atleast 2 years and then you will know what its lik living with them. soem say live with atleast 5-7. because around that time or marriage is the hardest. i duno why but it is. but live with the person first then get married.
the sex part i thik its just what the couple preferes. its lik an interest or hobbie now and days. real love making is rare now and days.

Answer 10

If I could go back in time and take away the first time that I had sex I would and yes I would wait til marriage.

Answer 11

I was dating a guy who was really into church and we use to go to church together but I had to break up with him because he was such a hypocrite. He would sex me up all week then when we go to church he would act all holy and pretend we were not sexual. I told him he wasn't fooling no one because god knew what we did.

I really liked him but I had to call it off because I felt like I was good enough for him mon - sat but sunday he was a different person.

I don't see anything wrong if you love the person but according to the bible it is a sin. But I have to meet my maker when the time comes.