My step son (10yrs) has being with us for almost 2 months after almost 2 yrs of not spending time with us (due to his mom) The problem has being with my 6 & 2 yr old kids he just can;t spend a fun time with them.. He like to spend MOST of the time in his room watching TV or playing Video games he doesn't like to share ANYTHING &if he gets to play with my kids he gets mad for everything or is just bodering them. We went to Sea World this past weenend & he wanted thigs be done his way I personally didn't have fun with a the discussions we had due to his disagreements.. Why is he like that with his brother & sister?.. We can he have quality time with them??? We have got to a point where I have to serve mny kids first dinner then my hubby & I eat dinner with him because even when having dinner he argues for everything!! What to do he will be living in 2 weeks But he will be coming in December & then again in summer vacations (if moms allow him to come) he live 16 hrs away !! What to do??
2007-08-02 07:44:43 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Don't allow him to have video games in hos room. By allowing his behavior you are enabling him to continue his nastiness. Make him sit at the table with the entire family. Tell him that it is how it is done in YOUR house and if he wants to eat he has to eat with everyone. If he argues send him to his room (REMOVE ALL TOYS). A 10 year-old should not be dictating to the parents. You need to get your husband on board with this or he will never have any control when he is visiting.
2007-08-02 07:50:08 · answer #1 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi I understand how frustrated you are feeling. Your stepson is feeling a lot of pain and frustration at the moment, and needs patience and compassion.
He probably doesn't feel part of his new family and is struggling to adjust. He may also be angry for having to leave his mom, or angry at his dad for not being there for him all the time.
His anger is his way of showing his pain. Both you and your husband need to show him lots of love, and make him feel comfortable in your home. Have a chat to your other children privately, to explain to them how he is feeling. Don't let him eat alone. Rather change the subject if arguments become nasty.
With lots of love and time, he will begin to feel more comfortable. Your husband should give him lots of individual attention. Let them go off and do activities alone.
Good luck!
2007-08-03 02:43:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st. my rule in the house is 30 mins of t.v OR video games for all children who live there or visit. when he is in his room alone for a long period of time, he is not required to socialize or build the skills necessary to socialize with other children. I would bet that his mother allows him to stay in his room playing video games all day. Remember, he might come stay in your house, but it is YOUR house. Your rules. Take them to the park or out to the beach/pool/ etc depending on where you live. Try to play games with them so you can teach him how to play with the children and how to control his anger when he gets mad. Try to have your husband do the same thing. the longer he isolates himself, the worse it will get.
2007-08-02 08:37:19 · answer #3 · answered by stardust12081 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is a very ugly thing and the kids are the ones who suffer. He is suffering big time. His world is turned upside down.
See, his world was torn apart, but his parents went on with their lives and found happiness again, wheres his happiness???? Its been ripped from him. He's acting out. He's angry.
Maybe counseling is to be considered.
2007-08-02 07:58:04 · answer #4 · answered by ellen 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋