By the time the wedding is over I will have spend $150 on a tux to be an usher, $150 on two night in a hotel, Taken a half day of vacation from work for the rehersal, driven over 300 miles. Do I still have to buy a present?
2007-08-02 07:04:57 · 17 answers · asked by Andrew E 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
you should - but it can just be a card and a poem or something heartfelt...
2007-08-02 07:11:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
WOW!!! All you people are messed in the head! Do you realize that a wedding cost at least $30,000 for the bride and groom???? $30 dollars??? CHEAP!!!!! JUST A CARD?!?!?! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT??? It will cost the groom and bride at least $100 just for dinner for you!!! Weddings are super expensive!!! Even small ones! The couple pays to feed you, to come to the ceremony, phtography, minister...everything is in the thousand! Listen to me! The girl that's getting married! Your friend or relative is getting married don't cheap out!!!!
Sorry to say but you have to get a gift (money or actual present) and you have to give a bigger gift then most. I know it kinda sucks but your friend or family will always remember and will repay the favor.
Plus wedding are super expensive, your friend or relative is already paying at least $200 for you (considering the food, alchool, ceremony and everything). I would be so mad if someone didn't get me a gift. And I would be so embarrased if I didn't give one. So make it easy on yourself and give at least $200 of a gift.
It's a WEDDING people!!! Not a BBQ!!!!!
2007-08-02 15:22:53 · answer #2 · answered by cammy_pilon 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
As others have said, yes, it is probably expected that you'll purchase a gift. Although etiquette doesn't require a gift, it's a nice gesture anyway.
Maybe you and the other ushers, groomsmen and bridesmaids could pool your money and buy something together. If everyone pitches in $30-$40 you could end up with a pretty spectacular gift.
Good luck!
Pam
2007-08-02 14:54:50 · answer #3 · answered by Pam T 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A gift is never required. When I was a MOH, I spent quite a bit on a nice gift, but that's because she was my best friend. The bridal party pays for their outfits and other things like that so that is often considered your gift to the bride and groom. If you can't afford it, give them a card and a small gift from their registry under $20. You don't have to buy them anything expensive.
2007-08-02 14:39:49 · answer #4 · answered by tink 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes
2007-08-03 00:32:11 · answer #5 · answered by Margaret 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately yes.
You might also be expected to chip in for a group present from the bridal party in addition to your individual gift.
Be glad you are not a Bridesmaid, in addition to the above you would have to get a shower gift and possibly a bachelorette gift.
2007-08-02 16:26:46 · answer #6 · answered by ee 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nope, wedding gifts are not compulsory.
If they love you, your presence and participation will be enough. If that's not enough for them, they are superficial and you'll probably never get to hang out with the guy after the wedding any damn way.
2007-08-03 18:48:59 · answer #7 · answered by Sid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you do not need to buy a present. Some people may expect it, but you know your friend better than any of us do. In my experience, when someone is in your wedding party, that is a gift enough in itself.
2007-08-02 14:33:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, sorry. Those in the wedding especially need to buy a gift. You are obviously close to the bride and groom. The expense of being in a wedding needs to be considered when you take it on.
2007-08-02 14:10:40 · answer #9 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
No, just show up and receive the present from the happy couple.Couldn't you find a cheaper tux rental?I would have declined the offer,you are going way out of your way for them.Hope this opens your eyes....
2007-08-02 18:17:45 · answer #10 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
no one HAS to buy a present. however, most people do. you knew the expenses of being in the bridal party when you signed up or said yes to it. a gift should be given to help a new couple out, not subtracted because of expenses you had for being in their wedding.
i would think people in the bridal party or helping out would really want to give a gift, that they feel close to the bride and groom and really want to give a gift to help them.
2007-08-02 14:07:42 · answer #11 · answered by Christina V 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋