Do you consider foster parenting to be real parenting, or a job?

Question

It seems as if a lot of people consider foster parents to be babysitters, rather than actual parents. I realise that these children often if not mostly go back to the birthparents, but while you have them, you are a parent to them? You do the childrearing, etc. My husband and I are looking into foster to adopt, and realise we may just foster at first, and we seem to get a lot of responses from people who view it as a 'job'. What do others think? All opinions are welcomed, no right or wrong here.

Answer 1

It''s real parent.

Don't touch feeling of those who really love and spend time and money plus keeping secret that they are real parent.

I disagree it's a job. Any job will be paid. FOSTER are not. They really cares, they stay during the mid-night caring to their love one. At time, Stay awake the whole night. So, do not say anything about "It's a Job". I don't like it. I'm not a foster parent, but I feel it.

By the way, thanks for Questioning.

Answer 2

I would have to say it is real parenting that most people would only do for the love of children. The payments from the state can only be considered tokens and do not cover the material and emotional needs of the child. Additionally, many foster kids come with physical challenges, emotional baggage, etc. that require more parental attention. If you added together salaries from all the jobs a foster parent does (sort of like they tally on the jobs of stay-at-home mothers that's released each year around mother's day) it would surely be much greater than the payments that you get from the state.

People who keep foster kids just for the money are probably people that can't get a job anywhere else. Those are the ones that abuse them, tie them up in closets, etc.

I know someone who grew up in foster care. He's a well-adjusted person. He always speaks highly of one of his foster families, I believe they are the ones that had him the longest.

Answer 3

There are plenty of people out there who do fostering so that they can get that government check every month and really could care less about the child. This is wrong a foster parent should be a strong adult personality in the childs life. They should be someone who the child can look up to and someone that helps the child grow into a well rounded adult no matter how long their stay is. Good luck with your fostering I hope all goes well for you.

Answer 4

It depends on how YOU view it. As others have said, parenting is a job. If you are looking to adopt, then you are obviously doing it for the "right" reasons. Yes, some of the children are big "money makers", but those are the VERY troubled ones, are older and have been in the system for longer.

One piece of advice I will give is to look hard at the child(ren)'s background before you have them placed into your home especially if you have other children already in the home and family (nieces/nephews/friends/etc). Children are in foster care for an array of reasons (sexually abused, physically abused, troubled, etc) and some are the abusers. Just please be careful. I hope you find the child of your dreams. They are out there. My parents had one of the best until he got adopted by someone we went to church with.

Answer 5

Being a foster parent, The child may not be with you long, If some one want to adopt. So many person think it a job so they don't get attach to the child.

Answer 6

When my family fostered, the girl was our family. I was little then, but she slept in my room, played with my friends. There was nothing that I as a biological child did that she wasn't involved in. It really may be a good step to adoption as you get to see what it like having a child who is not your own but you are expected to love it as such, to see if that's something you can emotionally do.

Just as a reference the same girl my family fostered had to go back into the system later on and was taken in by another woman who thought of her as a paycheck. My own family actually brought her out places just so she wasn't lumped in a room all day.

Answer 7

well i think it is a combo of both ...when you have the children you are the parent ,and primary caretaker. But on the orther hand it is a job you have decided to work for chidren services when they get a child that is not being taken care of you agree to allow them to place the child with you untill they can find another solution.But i dont think it matters how people catagorize what you are doing because no matter the title you are given you are doing one of the most gernorous things in the world by allowing the child to stay with you and giving them some stabilty in there life i commend you keep up the good work

Answer 8

definitely it is parenting. If its thought of as job, then they are in it for the wrong reason. Besides, the money foster parents get barely covers the true cost of raising a child...food, clothes, furniture, allowance, family vacations, car seats, toys, christmas, birthdays, school supplies and this is just a start. I love and treat my foster kids as they were my own birth children.

Answer 9

It's the toughest kind of parenting there is. True you get some kind of monthly check, but kids will always cost 10% more than you make. Also the kids especially older ones, know this is temporary and you have a very short time to establish perameters and respect with them. Many of them will have problems adjusting, too, as far as dealing with whatever situation put them in foster care to begin with. Good luck on your decision.

Answer 10

Definitely real parenting, maybe even a little more. Foster parents generally take great care with children that other people created and now cannot or WILL not take care of their own responsibilites. For the most part, foster parents are loving and nurturing and treat their foster kids as well as they would their own biological children.