It seems like when I feel I am being a jerk, I seem to get further along with a woman than when I am being a gentleman. I have gotten the "you are a great guy speech often as of late." How great do I have to be? When I have been told that I'm being a jerk, all I have to say is, "I'm sorry." I don't like being a jerk and most women say they don't like men who are jerks, yet it seems to work for me when I am. What's up with that?
2007-08-02 04:53:59 · 12 answers · asked by Solomon Grundy 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Girls want jerks
Women want gentlemen
It's your choice
2007-08-02 04:56:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
This has been my experience with "nice guys". I am not saying this about you in particular, just that what I have found with the nice guys that I have dated have a tendency to be real sappy. You know go overboard. I am all for a man that treats a girl right, does nice things for her, buys her gifts, etc.. The problem that I get into is the writing long poems, saying she is the most beautiful woman in the world, I would die for you kinda things. Women love to be treated good, they just don't want a man that comes off less manly. That doesn't mean be a jerk, it just means know the woman, know what she needs, and give her that, nothing more, nothing less.
2007-08-08 18:48:22 · answer #2 · answered by jessielouise11 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bro, despite what women say, they always seem to go for te jerks. it is old evolution idea of women wanting the jerks and the risky guys to mate with but when it comes to raising a family they want the nice safe guy. it sucks, i know exactly what you mean. if you believe ryan reynolds in Waiting, then you never want to be in the 'friend zone.' once you're in the 'friend zone,' your're screwed, then they no longer think of oyu as a sexual being, but like a brother...or a lamp. or maybe you subcribe to the the Ladder Theory, if you do, then there is no hope once you are on the friends ladder.
2007-08-02 05:00:23 · answer #3 · answered by shdw313 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what IS up with that. That's ridiculous.Don't be a jerk. The girls who like you when you're a jerk aren't worth it. Being a gentleman is the best you can do. Find a girl that appreciates it. Good luck.
2007-08-02 04:57:46 · answer #4 · answered by kristingirl2010 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take her out to a nice dinner and pay for it and everything, get desserts, and stuff like that, talk be a gentleman, and not a jerk, and then walk her up to the door step of her house or what ever, and if she says "Your a really great guy, thanks for everything" and then smiles, kiss her! Thats how most people i know get past the friend stage
2007-08-02 04:58:53 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are hanging around the wrong crowd. A smart woman likes to be treated as such.
2007-08-09 07:29:09 · answer #6 · answered by txpainthorse 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
~Scuba Brock is helpin' a brother out!~
Jason, I'm going to open your eyes up here. I'm going to raise a lot of awareness and I know that this is big for you. This one answer is going to be a life changer.
Whoa...slow down there...a life saver? Yes, Jason, I'm serious. I'm going to help you out so much. Enough babbling, let's dig down deep and get going! (oh yeah, might want to grab some breakfast to eat, too!)
First things first - let's start off with a shift in your thinking. Think about what the woman who you're interested in needs and wants and don't assume that these are the same things that YOU need and want. Don't try to fit your persona into hers.
And don't assume that what women want is going to make ANY sense to you, because it probably won't. I'm being honest here. This shift in thinking was a HUGE wake-up call for me. Almost none of what I do to be successful with women is logical - but it works. But, after being successful time and time again, I realize it does make sense.
A lot of what I teach is counter-intuitive. Huh? Basically means that I go against what most people teach. I'm not here to give you therapy support by saying "oh, jason, you can get through this. Just wait, you'll find a woman that loves you and you'll get everything you want."
Guess what? I got BAD news for you. It doesn't work like this. If you don't change anything that you're doing right now - you're ALWAYS going to be put in the "just friends" category.
How can you change this? Plain and simple, by listening to what I'm telling you to do. Here goes...
Let's get a little deeper into the "female pyschology" of dating. What do women want? (Wouldn't all guys love to know this, lol)
Female select males most of the time in nature...and in modern human courtship. I mean, after all, if you're dating that supermodel YOU'RE the lucky one because she chose to be with you, right? WRONG!
This is the first point I want to drill into your head. When with women, you need to communicate that you are the selector and NOT the selectee. If you're the one being qualified, you're always going to lose control in the relationship. You'll just end up being that tag along "best friend" nice guy.
This one concept is very powerful. If you think like this - it points out to this woman that she's most likely NEVER heard from a man in her life. Oh yeah, and it makes you FAR MORE attractive to all women.
So what am I getting at? That you're completely right in your question. I noticed how you said things like "It seems like when I feel I am being a jerk, I seem to get further along " and "most women say they don't like men who are jerks, yet it seems to work for me".
What's this telling you? No, you don't need to be a "jerk" to get the ladies. I'm not hear to teach you that junk. I'm honestly looking to improve the quality of your life here.
This is telling you that counter-intuitive ideas work! You said it yourself! You're beginning to see that this "nice guy" technique really isn't getting you anywhere. Let me explain...
Most HOT women live in a reality where men kiss their butts every day. Don't believe me? Just browse some of the questions and you'll know exactly what I mean.
Guys instinctively are turning into wusses around women. And these women are just thinking "not again..." and will just label you as the "just friends" guy.
So what do you need to do? You need to change this. You need to make it impossible for women to put this label on your forehead. How? Well, I'm glad you asked...
Ok, let's just say you met this girl, and then you're saying good bye:
Her - "Hey, yeah, nice meeting you. I got to go though."
You - "Yeah, talk to you later."
Her - (turns to walk away)
You - "Hey...(let her turn around)"
Her - "What?"
You - "You know, even if you turn out to be a complete freak show, at the very least I think that you're going to make a nice friend" (then give her a subtle sly smile)
End of conversation.
Then, after you've set up this frame, flirt and make sexual innuendos and jokes about it in a good way. Here's another example.
Her - (she tries to hold your hand)
You - "Hey, remember, we're just friends here. "Friends" don't hold hands, that's just weird. Man, don't you have any friends? This is like the #1 unwritten friend rule." (you're saying this in a flirty, cocky & funny way)
This is something that a woman has most likely NEVER encountered. And that, Jason, is why it works so well. Do the counter-intuitive things in life and you'll begin to change you reality that you live in.
By the way, if YOU talk about being friends first, it makes you remember to look past her looks and find out what kind of person you're dealing with. It's truly a win-win situation. You'll thank me later.
Wow! I told you I wasn't going to give you a shallow answer, lol. But, there's still a lot to be learned.
You know what? I want help you get past this "just friends" stage with women. I've been there before and it just bugged me! It still bugs me thinking about it, lol.
Email me at brockdarock33@gmail.com
Talk to you soon, Jason.
Brock
2007-08-02 05:35:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
add some flirting to a woman that you want to get to know better...romantic dates...see how it goes than move forth....good luck....
2007-08-10 04:47:00 · answer #8 · answered by Jo-Jo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
women! change the type of women you are dating!
2007-08-10 01:08:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
women are fickle. and a chase is more fun.
idkw. i hope u find someone who loves you for who u r though.
2007-08-09 19:38:25 · answer #10 · answered by kiki<3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are insane. I apologize on behalf of my gender.
2007-08-02 04:58:55 · answer #11 · answered by englefontingle 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋