Me and this girl have been friends ever since we started high school (I am currently in year 10). Lately I have been getting sexual feelings for her, the other day when she was over my place we just started kissing out of the blue, so I know she feels that way about me too. A couple of days later we went further just foreplay no sex. I don't know what do to, I don't know whether I want to start 'going out' with her or just stay friends or 'friends with priviledges'.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
2007-08-02 03:11:00 · 8 answers · asked by justin_k007 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you care about her you should ask her out or just stay strictly friends. Friends with privedges just gets messy when she starts liking another guy or usually it leads someone to really wanting to start dating and if the other doesn't want to it can ruin your friendship with fighting.
2007-08-02 03:15:53 · answer #1 · answered by alius n 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, let me say that casual sex - or friends with privileges has no place in high school. That's not to say it doesn't happen, and I'm not necessarily downplaying it.... I had a few friends on this plan over the course of my college years - and we had a blast! But, in high school, the maturity level just isn't there to be able to truly handle both the responsibility ( to avoid pregnancy and disease) and the emotional risks associated with this.
Beyond that, I'd say that if you two are close enough to be engaging in foreplay, you should be able to have an open discussion about your feelings for eachother. Don't hesitate to ask her what she wants from the relationship - and don't spend too much time worrying about 'destroying' a friendship. It isn't as common as it's made out to be. If things just don't work out, maintaining the friendship is definitely possible, though awkward at first. It only becomes a problem if one of you treats the other with severe disrespect - by cheating or something.
Good luck.
(By the way, I met my husband in 6th grade...we were friends for many years before we started dating, and have now been married for nearly 8 years!)
2007-08-02 03:18:41 · answer #2 · answered by Snoopy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friends with priviledges never works especially if the girl was a bestfriend. This is a sticky situation because you can loose your bestfriend in the process whenever sex is involved. Women tend to get really emotional about sex and sometimes when they say it's just sex, they don't really mean that. Just think about it very well, the most respectable way is to start dating her, but make sure you are not dating her just for the sex, if you want to date her make sure you like her for her other attributes as well - she is you bestfriend, always remember that.
2007-08-02 03:17:52 · answer #3 · answered by veryvengy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit down with her and talk about your feelings.find out how she feels about you before taking it to the next step. Keep in mind sex can ruin a good friendship your emotions start to go crazy when you become sexually invalid. And don't forget sex produces children if one is not careful I don't think your ready to become a father yet. Take your time finish school. You have your whole life ahead of you. Don't mass it up by following your feelings that's how mistakes are made.
2007-08-02 03:43:08 · answer #4 · answered by gizmoe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say ask her out. If you're friends already, and you both have sexual feelings for each other, that's just a bonus. Most people with a normal personality can be friends with a former boyfriend or girlfriend after they break up, so I say try it. This might be the person you can live with for the rest of your life.
2007-08-02 03:16:17 · answer #5 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all it is friends with benefits not privileges!! You are to young to be doing that!! SO just wait until you are over 18!!
2007-08-02 03:17:44 · answer #6 · answered by mnm16685 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just let it evolve naturally. if she doesnt want more then dont push for it. whatever feels right. just dont start dating another girl while your still enjoying 'priviledges'..
2007-08-02 03:14:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's normal for you to feel things for you best friend, i think we all do, but what i think you need to do is talk to her about it, maybe she doesn't feel the same way! maybe it's more than just lust! talk to her, maybe your one of the few lucky ones who find their soul mate in high school!
2007-08-02 03:16:24 · answer #8 · answered by hunkyscutie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋