well i remember when i was a kid me and my mum use to always bake cookies and stuff, and she would help me with my homework, she would never get mad at me, she would do my washing, all those motherely kind of things.
now i barely even no my mum. my parents are getting divorced. i live with my dad and i only see my mum about an hour a day and sometimes never. she gets mad at me all the time, when i ask for her to help me with my homework she says she doesnt no how to do it without even looking at the question, my parents ALWAYS fight infront of me, they smoke infront of me, damn she wont do anything with me anymore, there is ALWAYS collection agencys calling up at my dads house. if im sad or im crying they wont do anything or ask whats wrong.
im not saying that they are bad parents but i just wish they would be more like they use to. its like i dont even no them anymore. and they are always fighting about money.
so what do you think???
2007-08-01 09:22:18 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
btw my parents WONT sit down and talk with me, ive tried it many times before it just doesnt work.
2007-08-01 09:30:01 · update #1
i dont think my mum will do anything with me either, i asked her if she could take me to the zoo like 6 times this summer and she always says tell your sister to take you on sunday. she just doesnt want to do anything anymore.
and just the other day i got mad at her, so i left her house and i walked home which is like a half hour walk home and i was suppose to be staying for dinner and she didnt do anything she just let me walk home, and she didnt even call up my dads house to see if i was safe at home. =[
2007-08-01 09:34:03 · update #2
I think the stresses of life broke them down and your mother doesnt know how to handle it.
2007-08-01 09:30:44 · answer #1 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You always have a right to feel sad. Feelings are neither right or wrong, they just are. Try not to let the sadness rule your life, but if you feel sad and need to cry - do it.
A good start to feeling more connected to your mother... would be to print these pages out and show them what you've written.. you've written some absolutely beautiful things about your mother.
Sometimes it's hard to see the view through a smashed window.. sounds like the difficulty your parents are having, is making it hard for anyone to see anything else very clearly. Be understanding, that they are probably both very stressed out. Talk with your mom, tell her you love her.. show her what you've written in the question, and maybe this response. Take a second to step back and realize the relationship you had with your mother and then remind your mother of that very loving relationship you had, and miss. Be direct.. be honest.. be open. If you love your mother.. tell her. Give her the biggest hug she's ever gotten from you and kiss her cheeks.. tell her you love her and miss what you had.
Everyone goes through hard times.. the only way to see things differently when you're in a situation, is to step back for a second, compose yourself, and then look at it with a new perspective.
2007-08-01 16:32:25 · answer #2 · answered by Blip B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off you are not being a baby feeling sad. Secondly I hope you don't feel that any of this is your fault it is not!!!!! Thirdly adults sometimes are just self-centered idiots. Your parents are so caught up in their problems that they can't see what is going on around them. I don't think that your parents are bad they are just human. Try to be patient and helpful. I know that is alot of responsibility for a child but you seem like you can handle it. Ask if there are things you can do to help out or better yet just take some things upon yourself. You know chores around the house, helping with the shopping etc. I have been a child watching my family fall apart and I know it really hurts and you feel helpless but things do get better with time. Just keep your chin up. Do you believe in God? A little prayer couldn't hurt things either.
2007-08-01 16:52:16 · answer #3 · answered by Wilma S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, it sounds like your parents are going through a terrible time and you are the one who is suffering. Things will eventually settle back down and get somewhat back to normal. In the mean time you need to try to understand that it is not you at all, it is their problems that are the cause of all this dissruption in your life. Just try to help out when you can and things will get better. If you need someone to talk to you can e-mail me if you would like. Divorce is hard on everyone. Hopefully you have someone else (maybe Grandma or an Aunt) who can support you and help you through this. You are still very important to your mother I am sure, she is just going through a tough time right now.
2007-08-01 16:55:15 · answer #4 · answered by CINDY J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will never again be like it used to. How old are you? You have to at least be 13 to be on here. At your age, you're old enough to do your own washing and cleaning and food making etc... Understand that the relationship between your parents is what's failing. She is stressed out. While I don't agree with her taking her stress out on you, realize it's not about you. She's stressed out and is having a hard time dealing with things at the moment. I know you may not feel it's fair for you, and if you're under 16, I can understand you feeling that way. If you're older than 16 - welcome to reality. It's not pretty.
BTW - sounds like you're mom is REALLY depressed. She needs help.
2007-08-01 16:32:11 · answer #5 · answered by swordarkeereon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, honey, it's totally normal for you to feel this way! Divorce is hard on EVERYONE, and it's not your fault!!
Don't take your mother's anger to heart, she's not mad at you, she's mad at your dad, and she just lets her frustration out on you... The best thing you can do is to let your parents know how you feel.
I wish the best for you!
2007-08-01 16:30:02 · answer #6 · answered by Kat 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They are selfish and immature. They should put their child first instead of their own needs. You should try writing her a letter telling how you feel. If this doesn't tug at her heart then I don't know what to tell you. Don't ever think that any of this is your fault. You didn't ask to be brought into this world.
2007-08-01 16:30:31 · answer #7 · answered by Y!A P0int5 Wh0r3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they are neglecting you slightly, that's probably cos they have so many issues around the seperation. can you arrange to see your mom when your dads not around? if she used to do all those things with you, she probably still feels the same. i hope she isn't just coming over to sort finances and things out with your dad. she should be coming to see you. ask her if you guys can do something nice, even just once a week.
2007-08-01 16:28:38 · answer #8 · answered by purple_butterflyuk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should say 2 ur parents what u just put in ur question talk 2 them maybe things will change with ur relationship with both ur parents ask them if they could each have a better relationship with even if they don't want a relationship with each other
2007-08-01 16:28:09 · answer #9 · answered by goodies make the boys jump on it 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that your mother has problems, is upset, maybe depressed. her relationship with your father has changed, and they are not happy.
it's NOT YOUR FAULT!!!
your mother is distracted by her own problems, and you are left to suffer. this happens quite often, and you did nothing to deserve it.
you can let your mother know you're lonely, scared and feel left out of her life. ask her if she can talk. she might.
i hope that this is temporary, and once your parents have gone their separate ways, you can have a better relationship with your mother.
2007-08-01 16:27:17 · answer #10 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋