ok, so my son was suppose to be grounded to his bedroom because him and his brother got into a fight, (not a big one, no punches or anything) just a screaming fight over what to watch on the tv. so i told both to go to their rooms. but later that night their was a knock at my door and it was my son (in handcuffs) and two police officers. they said him and a couple of friends were throwing stones at cars as they drove by. they said they would either release him into my custidy or take him to jail for a day or two and hopefully learn his lesson. i said take him to jail. but my mom is totally against it. she was so mad. and was going to go to the jail and get him. my friends all say that i was right. and that he wouldnt have learned his lesson if i didnt and he would think he could get away stuff. do you think that i was right or wrong? but please be nice about it.
2007-08-01 05:23:36 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Sounds fair to me. In addition there should be additional punishment at home when he is released.
2007-08-01 05:27:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes I think that you were absolutely right! I know that it wasn't anything horriffic that he was doing, but it was enough that he was brought home by the police. Not only did having them take him show him what life in jail is like, it also showed him you are not going to let him get away with inappropriate behavior. If he views you as a push over, more than likely he will continue doing whatever he wants and sneaking out, and eventually that can lead to major trouble. But you showed him that you are not willing to be linient on him, and there will be severe consequences for all of his acions. I am wondering if you are a single parent (there is no mention of dad)...and if so then you are showing all of your children that you will not put up with them misbehaving and it will set them off on a good road too.
Well Done ; ))
2007-08-01 07:10:58 · answer #2 · answered by lilprincess029 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you made the right call. Kids these days can get so out of hand and they need to learn before they do something worse than throwing rocks at cars. He now has been exposed to what its like being arrested and put behind bars. Hopefully he will wise up and never want to go back there. Granted he really didn't do something all that bad but he needed to be taught a lesson and I think that was a better one then you could have tough him.
~Thank God I don't have kids~
2007-08-01 05:30:41 · answer #3 · answered by banksd74 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You were right. I would have let him go to jail. Throwing rocks at cars may not be the end of the world but its still a crime - the owners of the cars could sue you in civil court to pay for the damage. I would ground him for a long time, too - on top of whatever he gets from court.
They probably won't let your mom bail him out, either. Since she is not a parent or legal guardian. Tell your mother to mind her own business.
2007-08-01 06:36:30 · answer #4 · answered by Brandi C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a mother, step mother and a foster mother and I can honestly tell you that I have pretty much seen it and done it all. One night my 15yr old took our car and went joyriding with friends in the middle of the night. She got pulled over for not stopping at a stop sign. We had her arrested and she spent two nights in jail. (grand theft auto, lying to an officer, out past curfew, driving without a license) She will be 18 soon and she has apologized for the grief she put us through and she even says that we did the right thing by having her arrested.
You need to tell your mother to stay out of it. You are the parent here trying to raise this child. Hopefully this will help him to straighten up (It took 1 1/2 years for my daughter). But if he has to deal with inconsistencies between your mother and you, he will play you against each other. You need to let her know that you respect her feelings but that she needs to respect you as the parent.
Good luck!
2007-08-01 06:03:26 · answer #5 · answered by taizy77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you were right on. When he comes home take the door off of his bedroom and removed everything but his bed and a lamp. Including anything hanging on his walls. Tell him he has to earn the items back just as he has to earn your trust back. This time it was just throwing rocks at passing cars, next time it may be stealing cars.
Your mom has no say in this matter as this is your child. You are the one the authorities will come to when things happen. If she tries to get him out of jail then tell her he can live with her. I bet she'll change her mind then.
2007-08-01 05:37:27 · answer #6 · answered by Teresa M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Of course you were correct. You know it and just
need to hear it from others because your mom
doesn`t have the right mind set to agree with you.
Now a days, kids are told to "just do it" so they do.
Believe me, they know the difference between right and wrong. They need this tough love to see
the consequences of their actions before they
graduate to worse crimes and worse punishments
that may lead to a long prison term or even death.
I commend the police for wanting your son to learn
his lesson hopefully without any lasting marks on
his record and I hope your son learns that you are
serious about your love for him, but will not put up
with his bad behavior.
2007-08-01 05:37:15 · answer #7 · answered by Blessed 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you made a difficult, yet smart choice. An experience like this will definitely make him think twice about the choices he makes. He was definitely old enough to know that throwing rocks at passing cars is not acceptable behavior. He just didn't count on getting caught. My husbands father turned him in after stealing an Atv with his friends. He said it was the hardest thing he ever had to do, but it worked. Today, we referr to him as "Mr. Principles"!
2007-08-01 05:36:37 · answer #8 · answered by lulu 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I want to give you a hand!! I know that was hard but if more parents would make their kids do the time instead of getting them off there would be more responsible teens!! More parents ought to be the loving mother you are!! In time your son will realize the same and maybe one day thank you for helping him straighten his life out!! Be nice about it but remind your mother that you are the parent and you would like it if she would support you and not undermine you!!
Way to go!! You are a remarkable mother that loves your children!!
2007-08-01 05:31:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a parent, I'm only thirteen, but I think that you made the right choice. He was doing something that could have caused harm to people, and caused them money. It was his decision, so it's his responsibilty. A day or two in jail should teach him he can't act like a jerk and not get fairly punished.
2007-08-01 07:12:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have chosen the same thing. He needs to learn that he is responsible for his actions and if that means going to jail...well, that is the consequences. It's a hard lesson. Good luck :)
2007-08-01 05:33:15 · answer #11 · answered by Bridget C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋