im 30 now and my lifes been extremely traumatic and painfull, ive been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, but i also feel i have symptoms that resemble post traumatic stress syndrome.....ihave had a chronic rage problem for years, that i struggle to control and that impairs my ability to function....my moods are extremely low everyday, i feel empty and alone, lonely and isolated...i live alone in a one bedroom apartment.....my thoughts race and spin constantly, leaving me confused..i have painfull flashbacks to traumatic times...i was sexually abused twice when 3 years old...i was bullied throughout high school, been attacked by street gangs, had head injuries...& now as im waiting for some therapy,, i feel extremely angry about my life, & the way its turned out, & whats happened to me, im angry at people and feel embittered, confused about who iam..& i dont forgive people for it..ive never made any friends or had a partner.i have no self esteem..
so is my life over now?
2007-07-31 21:56:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
i feel enraged with my life and people and whats happened to me...
i want to emigrate from the uk, go away and build a new life...i deffinatly do not want to stay here....but i feel these goals are unreachable for me because of everything i have to deal with.....plus i have persecutory feelings, feeling as though certain people are standing in my way and im being prevented from leaving the uk, to build a new life...
2007-07-31 21:59:24 · update #1
so many caring people, i thankyou...god brought me to you all..the people who i wanna be around who can restore my faith in life and humanity...your the people i need to be with
2007-07-31 22:38:16 · update #2
NO!! 30 sounds old to you but if you work on it you're 30's will be the beginning of your life. In general, many people don't move on from their history until their late 30's. From what you're saying about your moods and flashbacks you need to see someone professionally to get you to a better place. Medication helps people as long as they take it. Once you feel better you can't stop taking it. Once you're happier (and you can be) you will make friends and have a partner. People are attracted to happy people. First you have to be happy w/ yourself and realize what happened to you is because of "them"not you. You were the unfortunate victim of someone else's sick mind. Don't let them make you a victim twice by being unhappy. You can get passed this and I hope you do so you can have an opportunity to know happiness.
2007-07-31 22:10:47 · answer #1 · answered by uknowme 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I don't think it's healthy that you live alone and seem to have no social life, as you stated. The best way to get past something like this to go out into the world and experience it. New experiences have a way of pushing away older, painful memories.
Secondly, yes, I do think you should forgive these people because that's the fastest way to leave behind these painful memories. The more you dwell on your past the more it will linger and poison your mind, so the best way to let go is to forgive and forget and move on with your life.
Looks at it this way: Don't forgive these people because they deserve it, but forgive them so that you yourself can move on with your life. You are doing this for you, not them.
2007-07-31 22:07:39 · answer #2 · answered by Secret Asian Man 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
when i walk on the streets people also look at me weirdly, and you can say from my avatar why, but i tried to make it a challenge.
you can't know how important was for me that people think i'm inferior, i realised a lot of things and i still have big plans; except the colour of my skin, which made me feel stupid, so now i am attending 2 faculties which r both scientific, there was one more thing i feel inferior about: i have asthma.
but do you know what? i know people that don't have asthma and their lives r mediocre, but heisenberg had asthma and got the nobel prize in psysics
so my advice is: don't forgive them, humiliate them, but not by force, but by your brain! good luck
2007-07-31 22:13:52 · answer #3 · answered by erzebet 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well hun I went through sexual abuse for 20 years! I have d.i.d. ptsd, am bipolar, have flashbacks and night terrors, panic and anxiety attacks! I have forgiven my abusers and it is not easy and it takes years to achieve it. First if you believe in a God ask him to help you to forgive the abusers, I did that for 20 years! I'm 45 and have just forgiven myself for not getting someone to believe me. I had incest forced on me and the incest and forgiving myself and my parents were the hardest. Anyways I prayed everyday to my God and asked Him to help me forgive them and eventually all the hate was gone and a lot of the pain left me too. So you see it just doesn't happen it takes years of praying and wanting it, But it may only take you a year it took me 20. If you want it bad enough it will happen, just pray! I wish you well in your life! hugs! Von
2007-07-31 22:33:17 · answer #4 · answered by bry7josh 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Forgivness, in a case like this or even worse,is to some, one of the hardest things there is to do...but when you do it, you are blessed by your Father, and by Jesus, who died for you and your sins...you are released from the hate, the anger, and when you can truly give yourself over to the Lord, He will take that pain from you like you can't believe...oh, satan will always be there to try to provoke you, he doesn't want you to do anything that will make your Father happy..but you asked me if you should forgive and how do you do it..so remember this...if you believe in the Lord at all...then you must know that He tells us to forgive others, or He will not forgive us..and to love our enemies...it is easy to forgive people that are kind to us when they make us angry, but how divine is it, and above it all, when we can forgive people for the really horrible things that they do to us...and if you know me, then you know what I mean.....XX and no, you life will just begin
2007-07-31 22:03:25 · answer #5 · answered by MotherKittyKat 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, one should forgive those who have hurt them in the past.
Speaking from experience, if you do not... it will come back to haunt you.
You can run from the past, but sometime; somewhere, the past comes back up and rears its ugly head.
I had a wedding I attended when I as 6 months pregnant with my son. They had assigned seating and they assigned me kiddie-corner from a person that had molested me and my brother when we were young.
Well, I spent the next three months of that pregnancy in pronomal labor and at risk of pre-term labor. I was so very stressed.
It is important to forgive; but try not to forget the past. As it was once said... those who forget their past are destined to repeat it.
2007-08-01 11:24:40 · answer #6 · answered by Totem 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should forgive people. It will help you in your healing process. Join a gym and get some exercise. It helps release endorphins (feel good hormones) your body will produce this and you will feel better and your confidence will improve. You can even make good friends this way. Don't hold a grudge, it will just make you feel worse - really forgive and forget. It's a real good release.
2007-07-31 22:03:11 · answer #7 · answered by me8two 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
i dont feel you can ever realy forgive people but you can move on ! your life is far from over ! if you keep thinking like this then the people who hurt you will have won ! the best way to move on is to take small step. if you feel low go for a walk do relaxing things to take your mind off it while your waiting for therpy and then when you get into your therpy thing will start moving forward !
2007-07-31 22:05:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgiven
2016-05-19 21:59:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I have been there.
Well for your own sake, mental and physical and spiritual, if you forgive him, you will stop carrying the hurt in your heart.
Whats the point of that, let it go, for forgiving can only benefit you
2007-08-01 01:50:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋