2007-07-31 11:35:01 · 15 answers · asked by applecheeks 4 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
I think you will find that at this point in time your friend is more concerned about you. Many people who are dying have already gone through an acceptance period. Their real worries are for the friends and family that they leave behind because they know how much emotional pain you will feel. So, the way that you cope is to assure your friend how important she is to you. That her life was important and that you recognize that and will miss her. She needs to know that once she passes that others will be able to go on with their lives. She also needs to know that she won't be forgotten. You cope by assuring her that you will be okay and that you love her and will miss her on this earth. Allow her to feel peace as she focuses on her remaining time.
People will find a way to cope in almost any circumstance. The experience will make you strong.
2007-07-31 13:21:02 · answer #1 · answered by Panda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This could turn out to be a very harsh response...but my advice for you to remind yourself that we are all mortals and will die one day. Hence what's probably upseting you is the suffering of the other person. It is, very difficult to bear the person you love - like - look upto suffer so much when u almost belived that this would never happen. Further more there are some weak momemts when you almost wished the person died so that she did not have to suffer so much!
But the way to deal with it is be very a strong person and take one day at a time, ensuring that each day is more special then the earlier one. Not only will this make her feel good but also that her last few days will not get wasted moaning and brudding. She will also have a good time.
My dear friend if you can be strong, your friend will find strenght in that!
2007-07-31 17:26:51 · answer #2 · answered by anjali k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well be as supportive as you can. Show that you love that person. If you have known them for a long time bring back memories. Coping is hard especially with a friend dying of cancer. Be by their side when ever you can. Crying is ok, just try not to cry in front of them, you need to be strong for them too. Dont be afraid of death cause its nature, God had a plan for your friend who is dying, maybe that plan was used. Just stay as strong as you can, write in a journal or something to keep from blowing up with all the emotions your feeling.
....Lovely....
2007-08-05 12:33:15 · answer #3 · answered by Free_hugs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had a friend that died a week ago and we weren't very close until cancer hit us both around the same time. its hard to let someone go but you know that there is a better place especially when life gets unbearable and that person doesn't even know where they are and who you are, life is just not worth living when you get in that shape. i hope when its my time i will have someone to help me let go and move on to a better place.
just be there regardless of what frame of mind that your friend is in. people cope in different ways. allways remember a friend is there when no one else is. try to keep her spirits up during difficult times and just be there. a true friend will know what to do at the right time. my prayers go out to you and your friend and God Bless!
2007-08-07 03:31:20 · answer #4 · answered by fiberglassliper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All i can say is make the most of every day,take pictures of you both together,regularly try and do something nice together that is not too tiring for her and make sure you tell her how much she means to you.When someone is dying of cancer you experience anticipatory grief(i think that is the right word) which is as painful even before you have lost them.You both have a hard journey ahead of you, love and best wishes to you both.
2007-08-01 03:55:32 · answer #5 · answered by ruby 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are as many answers to this as there are people dying from cancer.
We all react differently when confronted with death.
Personally, I have found in the same situation, some people like to talk openly about death, funerals etc while others pretend it isn't going to happen.
Some like to talk/gossip about normal, everyday stuff as if nothing is different, others obcess with their symptoms.
Some want a shoulder to cry on, others want someone to laugh and joke with to chase away their fears.
Take your lead from your friend, and be prepared for anything. Let her know you are there for her and willing to help her cope however she wants to deal with it. Your grief can wait until later, she doesn't have a later!
2007-07-31 12:34:44 · answer #6 · answered by Tarkarri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dad was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer on July 20th and passed away on July 29th. I thank god for the opportunity to spend the last days of his life with him instead of taking him without warning. We started our process on trying to be strong and talking about beating this all though we all knew this type of cancer was inoperable. Once he saw we admitted defeat by seeing it in our eyes and actions he let on to us that he too knew he was dying. Last Friday I leaned over his bed and told him I loved him which we haven't told each other that as long as I remember, not that we didn't love each other it's just that we thought we were to manly or something to say it. After saying that he reached his arm around me and hugged me, which hasn't happened in a very long time also. The next day he was unresponsive and I was by his side when he took his last breath. Four hours after his death my whole family was on his bed and we admitted we were at peace and glad his suffering is over. I miss him dearly and the funeral tommorow will be very tough. Just remember that when and if your loved one dies you may feel a sense of relief. Don't feel guilty about this. It is a normal process to know a loved one is no longer in pain and is in a better place. I'll pray for you.
2007-07-31 18:46:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is very hard for you the friend to cope and very hard for the person with cancer to cope. ive been there with my mother. mom was more worried about how me and my family were dealing with it then she was about herself. The only advice i can give is to love your friend and spend as much time with her as you can. keep her in your heart. do things she always wanted to do . If you and your friend beleive in GOD, then hes the best answer, he will give you all the hope, comfort, love and strength to cope everyday. it is a very ahrd path to walk, but the lord is there to guide you and help you thru it. god bless you and your friend and her loved ones.
2007-08-03 08:50:16 · answer #8 · answered by renae2007_1986 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-08 22:31:55 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend has more strength than you know - she is probably more worried about how everyone else is coping. Be yourselves and enjoy your friendship - be supportive, and above all be there, when and as you can.
Love and hugs
2007-08-07 20:06:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋