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I dont want to waste money by buying something he wont ever wear. His feelings on not wearing jewelry are very strong. What should i do?

2007-07-31 08:17:36 · 12 answers · asked by sweetsfromdat817 3 in Family & Relationships Weddings

12 answers

So don't buy him jewelry. Respect his beliefs.

Many couples do not have a double-ring ceremony. Sometimes only the bride wears a ring. It is okay . . . perfectly acceptable.

2007-07-31 10:02:58 · answer #1 · answered by Suz123 7 · 1 0

There are a lot of Adventists that are opting to wear a wedding band as this is not considered "jewelry". In the larger Adventist churches wedding rings are required so one doesn't make advances to someone already married.
So if it were t-r-u-l-y wrong (Adventists teach against unnecessary adornment) then it would be wrong no matter what the case.
My mother was married 36+ years before she did actually wear a wedding ring...until she lost it. I am VERY familiar with the Adventist religion.

You must respect his beliefs/standards & if he is against this then it is something you must deal with. What about the other Adventist beliefs? Will you be able to deal with those? This is minor.

And my question is if he is soooo adamant about this particular thing, why on earth has he proposed marriage to a woman who doesn't believe as he does??? Sounds like he's "straining a gnat & swallowing a camel".

Here is my email address if either of you need to talk about this. weddrev@gmail.com

2007-07-31 08:47:44 · answer #2 · answered by weddrev 6 · 0 0

I don't know anything about that religion but if that is what they believe, there is no reason you need to buy him a ring. Whomever marries you should be provided with this info and they will have to find an alternate speech when the part about the giving of the rings comes up. What do they do traditionally at a Seventh-day adventist's wedding? Maybe you can incorporate that into your own wedding or come up with your own idea. The ring symbolizes eternity. Maybe you can walk around your fiancee in a circle to represent this? Have you asked him what he would like to do?

2007-07-31 08:25:42 · answer #3 · answered by geistswoman 3 · 0 0

To start with I am an adventist. I found this forum because I want to pierce my ears now after 26 years of my life and I wanted to see what exactly people have to say about it. ON PERSONAL LEVEL For women (mostly), jewellery is something which holds immense attraction. Example, if you give a girl a choice between plain gold studs and beautiful diamond earrings. You can automatically guess what the girl will vouch for. Point 1 is that women get attracted to jewellery easily. Point 2 - Idolizing comes into play. Tell me one girl who has ever stopped obessesing about stilletos or expensive clothes or jewellery. So the only work a girl is left with is look Good, Gorgeous, Pretty,etc. Nothing wrong in looking good but then you slowly start focusing on your self. Its a cycle.. Pretty you- many people liking you- you get proud or start to need to look good all the time- Forget GOD in between. PUBLIC LEVEL If a women walks into a church with beautiful earrings or necklace, its the nature of other women to notice and think about it. So what are you doing in church then? Your concentration is long gone from the teachings and you secretly start wondering about that jewellery or the expensive attire. So there's nothing wrong for a women to wear jewellery or expensive clothes, only logically it distracts the other women. Again you might argue that it isn't your fault if someone's distracted but then again even your attention and ego boosts every time you know you made head's turn. And in you little egoist party inside, even you forget that your in church. So basically it's not wrong to wear a wedding band. Its a symbol of love and commitment between two hearts. Maybe the above is a little orthodox or something but if your devotional you would understand what I mean.

2016-04-01 03:44:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Don't buy him jewelry. Respect his feelings and his beliefs. I assume this is about him having a wedding ring? He'll be just as married without it.

My husband doesn't wear a wedding ring. He never has. He doesn't have any religious restrictions against it, but he hates wearing any jewelry at all and he works a lot with electricity. A ring would be at best an annoyance and at worst a health hazard, so when he said he didn't want a ring, I took him at his word and saved my money.

Fourteen years later, he's never strayed and never given me any cause for worry. He always looks proud when he introduces me as his wife and is quite demonstrative with me.

The rings are a symbol of your relationship; they aren't the relationship itself. Concentrate on the relationship, respect your partner, and accept his beliefs as genuine. You'll never regret it.

2007-07-31 08:25:26 · answer #5 · answered by gileswench 5 · 3 0

Do you mean because he wont be wearing a wedding ring?

If so, dont worry about it, not wearing a ring doesnt mean he is any less married to you. I would cut him some slack on this, its a religious preference, not some fly by night reason, and I think its a good enough reason to let him not wear a wedding band.
PS Alot of guys dont wear them, although its not really the normal thing to do, it is done. You can just tell your minister that its a one ring ceremony, they know what to do for that.

Best of luck!

2007-07-31 08:33:44 · answer #6 · answered by kateqd30 6 · 0 0

Here is a thought...

At my husband's job if he were to walk on the property wearing a ring we would be slapped with a $500 fine. I got him a ring any ways. The ring was not a sign, for us, of being married. It was a gold circle. Gold is long lasting, a circle is never ending, and it is something we gave to each other. Though he does not wear it who to say i couldn't still give it to him. If you wanted to do the same, you could always in close it in his hand as appose to putting on his finger. And make he and family understand why you have choose to give it to him.

2007-07-31 09:05:50 · answer #7 · answered by srs_stephanie 2 · 0 0

I take it this is a follow-up to your previous question. I still stand by what I said before. A man should respect his wife and the fact that he is married no matter what by SHOWING that he is married. Period. I could understand if he had a job that restricts him from wearing jewelry (construction, railroad, etc.) but even then, he should still put his band on the minute he gets off work. It's a matter of respect.

2007-07-31 08:26:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

have you tried watches. Adventists refrain from jewelry it does not serve a purpose. I had no rings for my wedding. Still things were wonderful ***i keep the sabbath ****also i am vegetarian***

2007-07-31 09:48:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Don't get him jewelry then. You could get one, or neither. Or you could use something else as a symbol of your partnership. Just be creative. Maybe he could always carry your photo or something.

2007-07-31 08:20:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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