I really want to honestly talk about things with my bf of 3...nearly 4 months. I just get the feeling that he's not convinced of his feelings for me, as result im not convinced either, perhaps its just how he is (needs time?)...and not him being secretative.
It seems he does really like me, he says i turn him on & we have fun...but am I right for him? I feel that if you really care for someone, u'd naturally want to tell them that & I seem to have to coax it out of him about what he thinks. I want to know to that he wants to be with me, just not out of politeness or coz he has nothing better to do.
Should I just sit back patiently and wait to see what happenes? or broach the subject, I really dont know how to though.
2007-07-31 04:38:39 · 5 answers · asked by Tickle_funny 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I would bring it up...dont be mean about it, just calmly, and sincerely. If he truely cares about you, he will see how hard this is for you to do, and he will understand and try his best to cooperate with you..make sure you get everything out you need to, and ask any questions you have..but do not over react and become dramatic. the key is to stay calm.
Good luck! :)
And remember, no relationship is a good relationship without communication..
2007-07-31 07:43:45 · answer #1 · answered by anna p 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, first of all you have only been dating 3-4 months. You have barely had enough time to get to really know each other. Take it from someone who knows, don't fall to fast. I have made that mistake many times and learned the hard way.
But, if you think you are ready to get that serious with him, just plain out ask him. Say, "hey, I need to know where you see this relationship going". If he can't give you some kind of positive answer, then tell him you don't think things are going to work out. A woman has needs, and one of those needs is to know that her man loves her with all his heart and that he is as serious about the relationship as she is. If he can't take the time to talk to you and listen to what you have to say, then he is not the right one for you.
Good luck, and I hope this helps.
2007-08-08 09:20:26 · answer #2 · answered by skinny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BROACH!!!! ALWAYS!!!! See being able to be honest with your feelings is the true test, of true love. See we all have love, it would be completely ignorant of me in any situation to say there is no love invovled. What matters is how we use that love, and hunnie this guys having conflicts on how to use it. Your a wise one, you know how to listen to your feelings, and you know how to act opon them. So let me just tell you this, Keep listen to your instincts, your right, something isn't right here, and if he can't come clean, what choices do you have? Wait for something that might not come, or look for something that could be right around the corner..... Ether way you look at it you don't have a choice. This guy isn't really appling that love he has for you and its got you scared, becasue you don't understand why he is doing it. You need some one who can be as.... heart smart... as you, or else your going to find yourself constantly having to wait....
2007-07-31 14:50:32 · answer #3 · answered by Brutal Honesty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
things a woman shouldn't do to a man is keep on asking about "what are you thinking" we need to talk about our relationship every single day.. why ? men need their space..they also live in the present.. the attention span of hearing everything you say depends on the subject..so in your case expecially if its more than five minutes and you haven't still gotten to the point..more than likely hes already tuned you out unless you talk in circles waking him up here & there to say yeah ok besides you shouldn't question everything his emotions your emotions is he right ..am i..etc..rather you should spend all this effort and energy in enjoying the relationship .i say your missing out on the fun. turning the "love" feelings into an obligation or sticking the chemistry into the freezer- no wonder its having a hard time sparking up. also if he doesn't want to be there ..he won't stick around..but the way this is going your convincing him to do just that..run away. but let me say this you haven't quite master (how to deal with) a quite, calm, reserve man its not that hes holding any secrets but its apart of his personality. the best way to deal with this type is the way hes speaking through his eyes ..all in the eyes or cuddling..the way his hand rubs against your arm etc.. you can feel he wants , cares about you right... but personally you shouldn't have to need so much & all the time(hearing) the assurance from him unless your doubting in yourself & what you have to offer. my advice believe your lovable ... be confident.. because the only one doubting is you
2007-08-08 05:49:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If someone is being honest they don't have to be super defencive. Because it is truth and they have nothing to hide.If a person is over-reacting.. super defencive 9/10 times they are being dishonest. Sorry. It is true.. go with your gut.. it is always right.
2007-08-08 08:57:59 · answer #5 · answered by hollie s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋