I don't know how many of you have seen the movie "When Harry Met Sally", but I remember a scene in which Billy Crystal argued that men can't be "just friends" with a woman. Unfortunately, I'm beginning to wonder if he was right. I've tried being "just friends" with some men, and it usually hasn't worked out. On one occasion, the guy fell in love with me, though unfortunately, I didn't feel the same way about him. Recently, I became friendly with a married couple and their two kids. Unfortunately, the husband wanted more than just friendship from me. A friend of mine told me recently that her husband said that if a man is ever especially nice to a woman, he usually has ulterior motives.I hate to say this, but it seems that just about the only time I can enjoy a nice, platonic friendship with a guy is when he's gay. What gives?
2007-07-31 03:29:27 · 13 answers · asked by tangerine 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you can have a guy friend if you are unattractive
if you are hot, then yes, he will want to sleep with you
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2007-07-31 03:35:45 · answer #1 · answered by Hermes711 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Good morning Tangerine.... Unfortunately in some cases men can't be 'just friends' with women because it's against their nature so do speak. You friend is right in some aspect about men having 'other intentions' instead of being 'just friends'. Believe it or not, there are a few men out in the world that have respect for a woman and don't have these urges that most men have when it comes to a platonic relationship. And there is nothing wrong being friends with a man that belongs to the 'Gay Society'. These men that are gay can sometimes relate to the problems that women go through with men. They have a great listening ear and can actually be your best friend. My brother is gay and I respect him for his beliefs and issues. he's a great person to be around. Now, as for your 'man' in general. Usually if he is extremely nice, he wants something in return but that's some of your men, not all. I have a philosophy about men which is this...The 'only good men' left in this world are either 'married', 'gay' or are already 6 feet under so go figure...lol. Have a great day and good luck with your issue!
2007-07-31 10:46:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Guys and girls associate closeness in personal relationships more with sex than with friendship. And there's good reason when it comes to a matter of trust in each other. Men think women are looser with talk and trust them less when it comes to sharing secrets and stuff with each other. True gay guys don't pose a problem to women since there's no real spark and desire for sex with them and so there's a feeling that they can be trusted more to talk to more easily. Men can easily have ulterior motives about a woman who may act a bit too friendly and he takes it as an overture to wanting to have sex with her. Some men just fantasize about doing it with the friend of the wife and some act on it. But it occurs a lot, more in their minds, but sometimes for real. To be safe, call the wife a friend and stay at arm's length from the hubbys.
2007-07-31 10:47:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hm...maybe that's true in most cases. However, I've had two good friends who are guys that I've been friends with for years and it's never been anything more than friends. We started off friends in middle school and even years later, we're seniors now, nothing's ever happened and no one wants anything to happen. In fact, I have a boyfriend of my own and they both like him. So I guess it just depends on the guy you're trying to be friends with.
2007-07-31 18:37:09 · answer #4 · answered by Bats 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have always and continue to this day have many women as friends, only one do I love and that is my wife, and her and I are still or should say also best friends. I think it is a matter of respect, respect for one's self and respect for the other person, and if married taking those vows seriously. Although there are many that are as you say, there also are many that are not. Not much help, but an opinion.
2007-07-31 15:39:41 · answer #5 · answered by Pengy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Believe it or not, Men CAN be 'just friends with a woman.
....well, at least I can, and I am male last time I checked my driver's license.
A lot of the time it is pressure to be in a couples type relationship, sometimes it is the pressure to 'shag'. Sometimes it is just reaffermation that yes, you are desirable to the opposite sex (gave that one up a long time ago).
But, in spite of all these pressures, there are heterosexual men that can be 'just friends'.
2007-07-31 10:40:15 · answer #6 · answered by Eric C 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Men are programmed for reproduction of the human race. When we first meet a woman the brain will immediately qualify her as one we are attracted to or not. No matter how hard we try to be friends with someone we will still think about having sex. Bottom line, every time.
2007-07-31 10:35:37 · answer #7 · answered by scott m 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I have male friends,although there is a slight disparity between men and womenfolk as friends as the women don't usually tend to leer and ogle my breasts....so perhaps you are rather correct
2007-07-31 15:47:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Remember, biology, 98% of our DNA we share with monkeys. Now, go to the zoo and watch, watch they do all day. It's part of our survival kit, we copulate, there is nothing you can do about it, other then give clear signals, if you want or not.
2007-07-31 10:36:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
i have alot of friends that are girls and i don't have a problem with it. except that it make my girl extremely jealous when they hug me
2007-07-31 10:35:13 · answer #10 · answered by DirtyRed 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋