help please, i cought my dad...?

Question

well let me start from the beggining my parents are spliting up, my dads an alcoholic, and in a deep depresion. there was only one day out of my whole life (im 15) that i can remembr where he wasnt drunk. my mom says he was sober for a year, she said we did family things. it was perfect when he wasnt drinkin but he picked it back up. me and my dad always fight because of his drinking he is a violent drunk. well about a month ago me and my dad got into it real bad and he called me a ***** and told my mom to make me leave. this was around 1am. my mom decided after that she was done with him. now i think he blaims me for her leaving him, hes always pushing me away and telling me i never cared before i shouldnt now, well last night he was saying alot of things like hes going to hell, and just pretty much dropin hints he wanted to die. i got worried about him and went to his hide out in the back yard, i found him cuting, there was blood all over... im scared. i just need some advice about

how to handle this. i dont want to tell my mom, she already has a bounch of stress with him, hes making her feel guilty about it all, andhes pushing all of us away, me more then any... i dont want my dad to hate me... and i just.. please someone just any helpful advice... im scared.. i just dont know what to do...

Answer 1

Here goes... First of all you have to understand that in no way are you to feel any guilt. You are the daughter and he is the Father. He is the one that is supposed to take care of you and not the other way around. Okay, this does not mean that you cannot be concerned. Just remember that you can never help him unless he cares enough to change. Either for himself and especially for you. You need to find out about an organization called Ala-teen. There you will find others in the same situation as you and you can find some fellowship and understanding that will at least give you the knowledge that you will need to at least save yourself. There you might find ways that you could influence your Father to want to give up the booze. You will know that you are not alone and you will be able to help others like you too. Here is the website: www.al-anon.org/alateen.html
I wish you all of the luck. Remember that it is up to your father to be sober.

Answer 2

I feel really bad about what you've been through. My parents have been divorced ever since I was seven. I know how it feels to be unwanted and hope that everything gets better soon for you. I think you should tell your mom or your friends about what you saw. At least tell one trusted adult. This may be a problem that your dad needs counseling for. You should see if your mom can talk to him. If you want to talk to someone I'm always here. Just send me a message.

Answer 3

first of all, if he stopped drinking, he would have a clear mind and wouldn't be doing or saying ANY of these things. remember, he is NOT himself!!!

if he wants to die, its bc hes frustrated with himself that he cant quit drinking and also, well, bc hes drunk. he needs help, NOW, and nothing you have done is you fault. i repeat, none of this is your fault. you are NOT responsible for your dad's actions.

if he ever gets sober, tell him how horrible it was when he was drinking. tell him how hurt you were, that you never had a real father, never had a normal childhood, bc you always had to worry about him. if he really cares, he will feel sorry, and if he still has half a brain cell left he should stay sober after he stops drinking and he should apoligize for how stupid he was.

Answer 4

TALK TO GOD first give ur life to Christ then buy a bible and follow all the rules in that book then start to pray very hard to God saying to help ur father complaining isnt going to do jack i no at first u will think this isnt going to work then skip over it but u will be suprised what prayer can do i will surely pray for u need more advice e-mail me.

o ya then after praying very hard go to ur father and say dad will u plz give ur life to Christ plz i will leave u alone if he says then just keep praying if he says no then God has a plan most likeley good him

Answer 5

Im going to try to answer. Try. Thats all. Tell your mom talk to someone an adult who can help you and try not to blame yourself cus its not your fault none of it is. Your dad needs help and dont think that your dad would ever hate you he loves you right now he is very sick and is having an emotionally hard time dealing with his problems. Its only right that you are scared i know i would be thats is a natrual feeling because what you are dealing with isint fair and you shouldnt have to deal with it alone. Tell someone who can help you with this your mom or another adult that you respect. Because you really cant handle this by yourself. You can e-mail me if u need someone to talk to at [e-mail] good luck!

Answer 6

:'( I'm so sorry that you've found yourself in such an ugly situation. I can't imagine how you're feeling. I know you said that your mom has enough stress about your dad, but I would really encourage you to just tell her that you really think your dad needs help. Tell her that you want to find someone or something that can help your dad, because his depression and self-destructive attitude is really worrying you. You don't have to make it seem like she needs to fix him, or that his problems are her fault. But she should at least know about your concern. I hope that your dad is able to pull out of this, but he really is going to need help doing it. Falling down is so much easier than getting up, so he is definitely going to need a hand. Encourage your mom to help you think of ways to help him, or people who can help him. And if you pray, pray hard for your dad...

Answer 7

If you don't tell your mom because she's dealing with so much stress, your dad might die. The stress of an unexpected death is almost unbearable too. Tell your mom. You have to. He really needs help, but sounds like he's in really bad shape already. Wouldn't you feel quilty if he killed hisself and you did nothing?

Answer 8

I'll tell you one thing,he's lucky he has a daughter that still cares this much.Listen,Hon,your' Dad is sick,just like if he had cancer or something.He needs help and he knows it.Until he decides to do the right thing,he's gonna be a danger to himself and everyone around him.Your' Mom is doing the right thing(and it's CERTAINLY not your' fault).Don't stop loving your' Dad,Hon,but you can't let his issues consume you,either.If he was sober for a whole year,than he knows what the #1 problem is.He's a grown man who needs to start acting like one.Good luck.

Answer 9

despite if it form of feels disguating on occasion adult men experience the ought to observe others bare. What i might do is forget approximately it this time and the subsequent time your dad is on the laptop previous due at night go and look back and spot if he's doing a similar. in case you do save on doing this and he doesnt do it always then it would be maximum suitable to depart it. yet whilst he does look at it we could say each and every week then depart a be conscious rfile on how porn is vile on your laptop and not log it off, and im optimistic your dad gets the image.

Answer 10

This situation really sucks. I'm sorry. I think the best thing you can do is talk to someone you really trust (especifically an adult) so that maybe they can help your dad. Also, talk to your mom. Even if you think this is just going to add more stress in her life, you should still tell her. She might be able to do something for him.
Best of luck....