Five year old boy "addicted" to video games -- how do I get him interested in other things?

Question

I watch my sister's kids during the day and I have been for pretty much three years now. The two girls are 10 and 4, and the lone boy is 5.

The issue is with the boy. Each child only plays a maximum of 30 minutes a day, one turn for 15 minutes to a game they want to play, and the remaining 15 minutes devoted to an educational game, like JumpStart Learning, Hooked on Phonics or Reader Rabbit. We'll watch about an hours worth of television a day, one show in the morning and another show while I'm cooking dinner.

The boy LOVES video games, just not the learning type. When it's time to turn the "just for fun" video game off, he takes an extra 5 minutes, at least, or until I take it away. When he wakes up in the morning, before he goes to the restroom or eats breakfast, he asks about playing video games, and when I say, "Not yet, we'll play games at x", he'll keep asking about it until it's time to play the video games.
Continued...

He doesn't want to color, he doesn't want to go outside, he doesn't want to go to the park, he doesn't want to read a book, he doesn't want to play anything else other than video games.

When he actually does play with friends or his sisters, he only wants to play video games with them, or pretend they're in the video game.

They (my sister and her family) went to Stone Mountain (big mountain with lots of family activities and a lazer show) this past weekend, he threw a fit over not being able to bring his gameboy.

I'm just not sure of what to do to get him interested in other things. I love him, he's my boy, I potty trained him, taught him how to write and ride a bike and I've been with him. But he just doesn't seem to care about anything else and I miss just running around the yard with him, pretending. Or coloring with him, or reading a book with him.

Any advice please? ):

I've been thinking about cutting out the "just for fun" video game time for him, but it doesn't seem that fair since his sister's play video games just for fun, but they don't have issues with it.

But then, they usually pick out the more educational games over the other.

You know what, that comment that I don't do things with the kids is a low blow and I truely do not appreciate it.

We go to the park.
We color.
We read.
We practice writing and math.
We blow bubbles out in the yard and play in the sprinklers.

And it's not that I'm sitting on my *** the whole day just watching them play, not like these other moms I see at the park that are on their cellphones or talking to one of their other mom friends. I'm with them, going down the slides, pushing them on swings, practicing with them, making up games, making things fun, coloring with them, reading to them, having them read to me, doing all of that.

He just doesn't care anymore. It's a fight to get his shoes on so we can go to the park.

Don't assume things.

Answer 1

say look There is other4 things to do or,UN pluck The video game and put th3e thing away and tell him go out and play.

Answer 2

Wow- well, since it's your sister's son, it would be up to her, too, but in my opinion, you need to cut out the video games, 100%, and ASAP. He does sound very addicted. How sad. I think that he sounds like the kind of personality that when addicted to something, it's all they think about, and can't handle even a little bit of whatever they are addicted to. I'd talk to your sister about your concerns, and see if she agrees with cutting video games out 100%. I'm sure it would be rough for a while, but after a bit, I think he'd eventually find an interest in something else. If you don't cut it out, it sounds like he'll just stay obsessed. Video games are not healthy anyways, 'educational' or not. There are much better ways to teach kids the skills they 'learn' while playing the educational games. The girls sound like they have fun doing the other things you do, so don't use "they have fun playing the games" as an excuse to say that they are okay. We had an Indian Powwow here this summer, and my sister has a picture of her 8 year old twins laying in the grass playing video games with the Powwow in the background. I hope this isn't your nephew's future... good luck~

Answer 3

I can only tell you what I would do. I'd declare a two week halt to all video games, for all the children. You might explain to the girls why you are doing it and ask for their cooperation. Tell the boy that you are simply stopping all video time for two weeks, and when they start again, they are all going to get the exact same time playing video games, and no more. Not one word. Them's the rules and you intend to see they are stuck to, no exceptions. And maybe you can toss in there something about how if he so much as mentioned "video game" before it's time to play, he will not get his turn. I think you need to lay the law down now, right out of the gate, before this obscession gets beyond your control altogether.

Obviously, since they are your sister's children, you'll have to get her OK to this plan. I hope she will cooperate with you because I really do see the possibility of the situation becoming a real problem with the boy unless you break this compulsive trend.

Answer 4

It would be ideal to know how often he plays video games when you're not there looking after him. If he's allowed to just sit there and play video games all the time, then obviously there's the root of the issue. Since he's obessesed with video games, it might be a good idea for the parents to remove the video game system for a least a week. As you know, it's really not healthy for any child of any age to only think about video games. With the removal of the video game systems, he will have to find other ways to entertain himself. If he's still complaining about not being able to play video games after a week, continue to withhold the system. If it takes 2 months for him to realize that he can have fun without video games, so be it. Also, there is no need to explain to him why the video game system is being taken away. Of course, he will throw a fit regardless, so a good idea would be to take the system away while he is not around (or in bed for the night). All you have to say when he (most likely) asks why is something to the effect of we're going to take a break from them. This should work, as long as the system is not given back prematurely - wait until he seems to have forgotten about video games. It may take a very long time, but in the end, it will be better for his mental health.

Answer 5

In my experience boys are a lot more interested in playing video games than most girls. My son would play all day if I let him and my daughter usually only plays a couple of times a week. I would just plan other activities for all of the kids and then go out and do these activities together. Since you are the babysitter, you could even go so far as to say "we don't play video games at my house". He won't like it at first, but eventually he'll get used to the idea.

You might let him play as video characters. The kids in my family all used to play like they were the characters in the "Zelda" vidoe games. I can remember playing "Little House on the Prairie" as a kid and I know a lot of the older generation played "Lone Ranger" and things like that. As long as they are playing they are still using their imagination and not just sitting on their butts all day long.

Answer 6

Give him a countdown when he is playing the game. 10 more minutes, 5 minutes, 1 minute, 30 seconds, even a 10 second countdown. Let him know that once the countdown is done, so is he. Any extra time taken will be subtracted from tomorrow's time. If he goes into the negative then he loses a day.

Give him a chance to earn extra time. I told my sons that for every minute they read, they get half that time in X-box minutes. To play an extra 15 minutes in the day, they have to read for 30 minutes (and I make sure they are actually reading by scanning the book they are reading and asking questions). The girls can do the same for TV time.

Answer 7

I set aside a specific time each day for my son to play 30 minutes of video games,but only after he has done all his chores and read for at least an hour.Try going to the library and letting him pick out a book.Most kids will read if the book is something interesting they picked out themselves.And remember whenever you set rules don't back down because if you do it once they will take advantage and end up getting away with it every time.

Answer 8

Maybe its best to not let him play them for a while. There has to be something else that he likes to do. Maybe a remote control car , legos. dancing to music, swimming,reading,something! Maybe one night let the kids help you fix dinner. Something easy but fun for them like homemade pizza or a creation that involves their fav foods. My aunt had a similar but much worse problem. Her son was about his age. He played video games alllllllllllllllllllllllllll day long! If she took it away he had a fit. She she eventually just got rid of teh video games becuase he was seriously like obsessed with them.But he has to have something he enjoys outside of video games.What about board games or dinosaurs? Good Luck! Sorry that some people are giving you a hard time about this and throwing accusations at you. Just keep trying to get him interested in other things. Look on the net to.

Answer 9

I have a real issue with video games. My nephew is 6 and he plays them all day long... when I go to my sister's house, all the other kids go out to play, and he just sits in the house and plays these games.... he really has a problem. I would not allow any video games at your house what so ever. My kids have them, but we put them up before my nephew comes over because we know it will be a fight, and he will want to play.. we told him they are broken and in for repair. mI would talk to my sis and share your concerns with her. I told my sis (who is a stay at home mom) to stop letting him sit in front of that tv all day, and just take them away completely......which she refused to do. It is a shame that a lot of parents use the games and tv as babysitters so they don't have to pay attention to their kids.

Answer 10

You need to cut out ALL videos, not only the "just for fun" ones. Children don't differentiate between educational and "just for fun". All he knows is he is allowed to play video games. So ALL video games have to be ceased. Then after they've been weaned they need to be allowed to play with them only as a PRIVELIGE that is EARNED by their behavior. They don't behave they don't get video games.

Answer 11

Hi Annie,

This is a trend with a lot of kids, today. Video game manufacturers made it easy, with the hand held games. But it backfires in a lot of cases.

But, it sounds like he is being involved in many other activities. Family outings, reading, bike riding. This is all you can do. Introducing him to outdoor activities, trying to involve him with other children, limiting his game playing. There is no cure, but you can limit the time he plays.

My son wants a Wii game system. I told him to keep reading, through the rest of the summer, and when school starts we will receive an assessment on his reading level. If he works hard enough, and is consistent, he earns the game system.

We also have a reward system, instead of allowance. Taking his dishes to the sink earns 15 minutes of game time. Playing baseball with me, riding his bike, swimming in the pool earns him 5 minutes. Picking up his dirty laundry, or toys earns 20 minutes. So he is banking time to play the game, but we will still limit it to after homework and active play with his friends.

Good luck - you sound like you are doing all you can...