Can we make this work again or should we just end it?

Question

In continuation to my previous post I just want to know how I can make my relationship with my boyfriend work. We have been dating for almost a year now. When we were in school things were great. I had him wrapped around my finger. He brought me bouquets to school if I came back from a long vacation and gave up his previous life of endless parties and millions of friends to hang out with me and my mom minus the drinking and parties. As soon as summer came I started my new full time job. We started to talk less and he found a few hobbies and a job. Now I feel like he doesn't care about me and I've noticed that I have become more jealous about his past. He doesn't seem to be affected by my emotions (he used to cry over me and call me all the time) and the passion seemed to die down. I remember when we spent the most magnificent days together. Now we are hardly alone or together. Is it possible to bring the old "us" back? How can I get him to fall in love with me again?

Answer 1

It sounds as though you've got some control issues. He seems to have found that he can live without the constant attention to you that you crave. He's unwound himself from your finger and has moved on.

If you want your partner to be wrapped around your little finger and await your every desire, you really want a puppy, not a man.

Answer 2

You cant get somebody to fall back in love with you its pretty impossible , but it is possible to get the old " you " as you put it , back.

OK well .. are your feelings strong enough to stay with this guy? and do you feel truly happy being with him? if so stay with him.

After a while in a relationship both partners seem to change specially if you both are going your separate ways in life , finding new hobbies or new jobs etc and becoming more mature and older.

Quote : "(he used to cry over me and call me all the time" that doesnt mean he doesnt love you or care for you anymore its either his more in control with his emotions or his just grown up.

Maybe you should try talking to him about how you feel and find a way between you both to get it back to how it used to be , ask him what he wants to do about the relationship if he feels it will go anywhere long term . Whatever his answer just respect that .

Best wishes and i hope this post can help.

Answer 3

I think the problem is not him but you. You sound like you are holding on to tight and like a fistful of sand, the tighter you hold.. the more that slips away.

In any kind of relationship you need individual time as well as together time. Allow him to have his friends and hobbies. get some yourself. And then the time you can spend with him will be more treasured

Answer 4

Love do not last for lifetime in relationship. Ppl mature. Let go of the past and move on with him if you still want to be with him. If not, move on your life on ur own.

Answer 5

of course it's possible to bring to old 'us' back. but first you got to ask yourself what do you want out of the relationship? do you want him to be the one wrapped around you or do you want it to be a mutual love thing?

i think relationships are all about compromise and it seems that you want this to work. you can try by telling him that you love him just because, and getting him little surprises. also i think you should speak to him about what he wants from your relationship.

again, i think it's all about compromise before throwing the towel in.

good luck! :)

Answer 6

Clearly he is tired of being used, manipulated & bossed around. You should move on before he does.

Answer 7

Hey girl,wake up.If he doesn't give time for you,so what.There are others i'm sure.So why waste your time.Go out and have some fun.

Answer 8

You need to end that and move on.