CHRISTIANS ONLY, ANSWER PLEASE!! Marriage question ??

Question

I was with my wife for 9yrs before we married last April. After only 8 months of marriage our union has disolved to almost nothing, at the point where the divorce is being filed. We started counselling and trying to talk more openly but with little success. I moved out in January this year and have financially supported her for the whole time of our separation, I feel that it is time to move on and proceed with diovorce and start anew. Since this is my first marraige and her second, I feel that even though I have repented for this I have no peace within myself or with the big guy upstairs, is it still a sin in the eyes of the lord??
What advice would you give or whats your understanding of the moral/sin aspect of this situation??
Will accept emails or IM also.
Thanks

For those who say I was starting the marriage the wrong way by marrying a divorced woman, the reason she left her husband was because he was physically abusive towards her. I dont think god had that in mind when she married the first time. By the way I ama born-again christian needing a little help now,.

Answer 1

I think your ok and not sinning in the eyes of the lord. Your thought process seems to be mature and realistic about the situation. Jesus allowed divorce for reasons like this. It seems like the both of you went about a marriage in the right way it just didnt work out. People were not created to live out miserable lives.

Answer 2

While the popular answer is that there isn't a moral/sin aspect of it...I don't necessarily believe it is a moral issue. It does say in the Bible that the only acceptable reason for divorce is adultery..It seems a little premature to be filing for divorce, but then again I do not know your whole story. It would be great if you guys could pray together and really attend a good, Christian marriage counselor and get involved in a good church. I think you would see some big differences... Do not think God has abandoned you or is angry with you.. right now you need to lean on him and trust him. It will all work out to his plan and will.. Keep on your knees and just pray.

Answer 3

Are you saved (born again)? If yes, you would not be asking this question because you already know the answer. In a Biblical standard you cannot get a divorce unless your wife cheats on you. Also you are suppose to try and reconcile the marriage if at all possible. You say this is your wife's second marriage and that you have been together for 9 years and only married 8 months? Did you live together in sin before you got married? Also was your wife a widow or a divorcee? If she was divorced, you married a divorced woman and that is also against the teachings of the Bible. You both have alot of sin going on here. Unless cry out to the Lord and repent and become born again (saved) there is not much else you can do. Here is a great webpage about Christians and divorce.

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Family/Marriage/divorce_is_a_sin.htm

Answer 4

I agree with Jesus Freak. If you have repented for the part you played in the marriage dissolving, then all is forgiven. But I would encourage you to pray for your wife and her relationship with the Lord. When you say you was with your wife for 9 years, do you mean living together? If so, this was not a good start for a marriage. The Bible tells us that adultery is automatic grounds for divorce. Has this occurred? Just try to remain friends, encourage and support her and don't talk bad about her. Pray for her and ask God to help you start anew. Sorry you are going through this. Sometimes we make choices that aren't prayed about in advance and we end up in a mess. God give you peace.

Answer 5

You have asked a very general question and provided no details as to how you two could be together for nine years and have a marriage ruin the relationship eight months later.
If you question is directed solely to the divorce aspect of the situation, then no, I feel that your divorce is not an issue with anyone, God and Jesus included. From my interpretation of what Christ supposedly said and did, the general overtone was just that we get along with each other and cause no harm.
Now, for whatever happened in that relationship, repentance is between you and Them.

Answer 6

You will not like my answer, but truth is always bitter. You were doing the wrong thing from the very beginning; you married a divorced woman and according to the Bible and the scripture, you were sinning from the first day you married your first wife. Now that you marriage failed and you realized your mistake, you are filing for a divorce; that you can do and you can separate yourself from your wife and live without a wife the rest if your life. (This is scriptural counseling). This is exactly a biblical advice; this is what the Lord told us in His own words regarding this situation. "He who marries a divorced wife sins; and he who divorces his wife except for the reason of adultery also sins." He who divorces his wife cannot get married again except after the death of his wife.

Now of course God is not God of hardship, or an oppressor. When the Jews asked Christ how many wives can a man have? He told them that a women for every man! When they asked him again why Moses approved of two wives and permitted a divorce, Christ replied "Because of their hard necks Moses allowed it, but it was not so from the very beginning; God created one Eve for Adam not two". If you refer to the State of Israel now, you could very well realize that the Jews no longer permit two wives for a man; they have apparently learned their lessons.

God is Merciful God, and he does not want you to live your life in loneliness; He loves you and always takes care of you. God is a forgiving God. Confess your mistake regarding your first marriage before God and not a priest, and the Spirit of God will lead you to the right way.

Answer 7

The Bible won't say something actually approximately comparable intercourse marriages, in spite of the indisputable fact that, it somewhat is implied many times with- homosexuality being a sin. The deep thoughts that I against gay marriage is that marriage is a COVENANT between a guy and a woman in undemanding terms. How a lot deeper do I might desire to flow, while God says NO, He skill it

Answer 8

Whoa! Biggie there! Technically by the law of the Bible you would be sinning but then you were living in sin for 9 years prior to this sin so.... Jesus came to set us free from the law because God knew that it is impossible for man to live by the law. If you ask God's forgiveness and truly repent then in His eyes it is as if the sin (event or events) never occurred. This is the beauty of mercy. Yet there is still a consequence for every action. You will never be able to "undo" something that you have already done. You can make amends and do your best to recompense for it here on earth and/or to the individual but it can never truly be "undone." It is one of Satan's greatest tools to get us to doubt ourselves, doubt God's forgiveness, doubt that He could, would or did forgive us. Doubt is of the devil in my way of thinking. I am in no way meaning to take the world by the horns and force your way thru it but rather make each and every choice carefully and with prayer and openness to hear and be guided by God. I'm praying the best for you and wish to encourage you by telling you that you are going in the right direction by seeking His will.

Answer 9

well the bible does say:

Luke 16:18
"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

and adultery is a sin. but the bible also says:

1 John 1:9
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

but the only sin he wont forgive is blasphemy against the spirit

Matthew 12:31
And so I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven.

but you didn't blaspheme.. right? So ask for forgiveness... and you should be good!

Answer 10

The Bible says that God hates divorce. Divorce isn't a sin.
Why do you want to get divorced? What changed in 8 months?
Anyway if you asked for forgivness then you're forgiven. Maybe you haven't forgiven yourself yet.