hey, i just got into a relaionship with this guy whos a few years older than me. hes 25 and hes in the band playing bass. i....dont think im ready to have sex yet and he respects that. but i think its unfair to him. what else can i do to make him happy?
2007-07-29 19:36:32 · 13 answers · asked by xSELENEx 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm really glad he respects that.
If you're comfortable doing other sexual things, that might help until you are ready for sex. It's also good for keeping interest in your sex life, so when you're ready you'll know lots about your partner.
If you're not at that stage yet either, you should try to get to know him better in terms of personality and stuff. Find out what his interests are and especially what interests you share.
I'm going to be dating someone who's younger than I am really soon, and I was dating someone a bit older than me. Both ways it's really important to respect what you're comfortable with. Never ever think that you should push yourself to be ready sooner. He obviously cares about you if he's willing to wait for you to be ready, so don't feel like you owe him for it. A relationship is about giving things freely without expecting anything in return.
2007-07-29 19:45:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he respects that you don't want to have sex yet then he respects you. Hang on to him tight! Well, not quite that tight.
It's sweet that you think it's unfair to him and I'm impressed that you haven't caved. So, flip the coin and look at the other side. This guy values you and his relationship with you more than he wants to have sex with you right this minute. You don't have to have sex with him to make him happy because you obviously already make him happy!
I don't know what you mean by "what else can I do . . ." but I think Monica Lewinsky type sex is still sex. If that's the case then I really don't know what to suggest. If you aren't ready, you aren't ready.
Just let the relationship develop and it will happen when it's supposed to. If you aren't ready and you go ahead anyway, then I can promise you that it will have a negative impact on your relationship with this guy.
2007-07-30 02:51:41 · answer #2 · answered by MollyUSA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can make him happy by just being you..
It's not unfair to make a man wait for sex..
especially if you just started dating...
If he is willing to wait till your ready..
then you found a nice guy... don't ruin
it with sex right away... relationships
are a whole lot more then just sex...
Get to know him more and take it slow..
Btw... congrats on your new relationship...
I hope it works out great for the both of you!
2007-07-30 02:45:35 · answer #3 · answered by Saffie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you're not a virgin, then he should be respectful of the fact, that you are unsure about your relationship, & not in a hurry to add sex to the equation. If he's sincere he'll wait, if not then you saved yourself the added hassle. If you are still a virgin, "all guys start out saying they respect you." If you give in to soon, there's no respect gonna be waiting, & you risk all sorts of ugly possibilities. Why should you be concerned about what's fair to him? It's your choice, life, & time. He'll either get it or he won't, but fairness shouldn't be the deciding factor.
2007-07-30 02:54:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not ready that's OK he must like just being around the you almost like the girl next door most guys dream about but never have
2007-07-30 02:43:46 · answer #5 · answered by Chris C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you do not have to do anything you are not ready to do. as you said he respects your decision not to have sex at the moment (i hope he does so until you are truly ready). anyway, if he's t\25, and you're younger, how young are you? as a Catholic, we are taught to have sex only within the confines of marriage. not all people adhere to it though. anyway, just be yourself. he seems to like you for what you are.
2007-07-30 02:41:34 · answer #6 · answered by philosophical beaver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm well instead of having sex you could always just have oral.
and thats really good that your going to wait.
its always good to be sure you actually want to do it with that person.
a relationship isnt always about having sex just give him some love hug him and all that cuddlely stuff.
make him feel important to you.
but if he really did care for you then im sure he would wait for you when your ready..
2007-07-30 02:56:08 · answer #7 · answered by Skye-dez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't see how it's unfair to him. it's a matter of respect, yes you should be grateful that he has enough respect for you not to sleep with you, but show your gratitude in your respectful attitude toward him.
2007-07-30 02:39:23 · answer #8 · answered by Mary Liz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well If he realy loves you then he should respect you for not having sex with him
you can tease him every now and then like strip for him then he will be realy looking forword to having sex with you when your ready
2007-07-30 02:42:27 · answer #9 · answered by The_Info_Ninja 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make out without sex.
2007-07-30 02:39:52 · answer #10 · answered by stoney 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋