How do I push for physical affection?

Question

A long term friendship with one of my best friends is finally developing into something more. We talk constantly, spend so much time together, with friends, our families..he talks about our future and how much he cares for me....but he still won't touch me! I don't even mean sexually, I mean at all. He says he's attracted - he looks at me as though he's attracted - but he won't cross the line. I'll reach out for his hand, and within minutes he finds some reason to drop mine. He hugs me like a china doll. He has yet to kiss me since we've deepened our relationship despite numerous opportunities. I am a very affectionate person, crave even the most casual of touches. I'm starting to feel rejected, but when I discuss it with him, he simply says that he's wanting to take it slow. We've taken it slow for eight years now, how do I make him see how much I want to be close to him? Are we doomed already?

Answer 1

Well this is going to be a hard one to decipher. Not because you didn't include many wonderful details, but because I can't for the life of me figure out for sure this guys deal with sexuality. Seems the friendship is doing good, which means the intimacy is there, but why the hang on physical intimacy after all this time aludes me. Which means its assumption time, which isn't always the best way to handle these things but its going to come to you honestly talking to him about this but without futher ado...

1. The obvious one, homosexuality, sorry thats just the obvious one.

2. Possibily hasn't sexually matured, which has nothing to do with his equipment and everything to do with how he views it.

3. Possibly sexual hang ups, could be he doesn't think he'll proform, are it could just be he doesn't think he can proform well to you..

4. Could be the other side of sexual maturity and he has develop whats commonly known as a fetish. Which basically means he has some sort of way he HAS TO satisfy himself sexually are he won't be satisfied.

5. Also some very, very good people out there don't trust SEX period, not that they don't like it, its just the way they feel about the act.

Now really the biggest help for you here is if you understand how important it is that you get him to be more honest about this. The whole take it slow thing you have ever right to conflict with right now and until you take that away from him your not going to make any head way here. So explaining to him how taking it slow is acutal forcing you away and making you feel regected well help you find the truth. Are rather lets just say thats your KEY, telling him how this makes you feel honestly should unlock the truth from the boy are give us more info to naw thru....