When I am creating a fantasy to masturbate to I sometimes pretend that it is a rape. Is this okay? Should I be worried?
2007-07-29 00:21:18 · 20 answers · asked by tori Lynn 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
This probably means that what turns you on is someone being in control. Thats it. you are probably aware that being raped is not ok and in the reality it would be scary, but when you are fantasizing you and pretty much put yourself anywhere and it can turn you on. That is what makes it different from reality. Don't worry lot's of people have crazy fantasies.
2007-08-05 16:17:19 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sad to say, it's actually a more realistic fantasy than being the significant other of a rock star or movie actor - a woman is more likely to be raped in real life than to become even a "notch on the belt" of a high flyer. (But does realism matter? Do men care that real women don't have boobs like basketballs? Or that real lesbians would never invite them to join in?)
Part of the rationale may be wanting a man to take control of you and your sexuality, so that any hot sex is not your fault. It can also be related to formative incidents - either in childhood (people develop sexual orientation by about 4 years old) or puberty - was there a "near-rape experience", when things got steamy but stopped there? A blend of fear and arousal leads to many "kinks".
BTW, rapes are NOT always violent - I was once married to someone who thought consent and foreplay were irrelevant in the marital bed, so to me it was always a form of rape, even though there was no violence (and certainly no fun!).
But hey, never worry that your fantasies are "not nice", at least they're human - mine involve "impalement" by animals, aliens and demons, and yet I have a fairly normal sex life! Sometimes I wish my partner would be able to pretend to force me, but he's much too gentlemanly for it!
2007-08-05 19:16:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you can recognize that it is fantasy and not something to pursue in real life. If you are really concerned about it, think about the factors in your life that would make you come up with this fantasy. Are you feeling a lack of control of too much control by someone else? Do you feel like you need to be punished or taken advantage of? Just some things to look at.
2007-08-05 07:00:41 · answer #3 · answered by Fruit Loops 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's very common actually, just so long as you, like Gauge says, recognize it as a fantasy. A lot of women (and some men too) fantasize about rape-like situations, and many seek to roleplay that kind of fantasy with partners. It's fine if you fantasize about it in a 'soft' form, but if you were seriously considering getting into a situation where you could get raped for real, then you need to step back and worry.
2007-07-29 01:43:48 · answer #4 · answered by HaphazardJoy 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That depends; as long as you realize that it is only a fantasy and not something you want to pursue in the real world, it is a perfectly fine and even somewhat normal thing. However, there is a huge difference between being turned on by this happening in a fantasy, and going out and looking for it in the real world. Keep in mind that you are consenting to the fantasy; you would not be consenting to actual rape.
2007-07-29 00:50:43 · answer #5 · answered by Karma Police 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
i dont know what to tell you, but i will say this, i often have the same thoughts. im not sure what it means. i have even had my bf act it out, and it is a real turn on. im sorry i cant give you reason or answer on this one, but at least i can tell you that you are not the only one. im sure there is more women out there who have the same thoughts. you shouldnt worry about it, its a fantasy. on the other hand, if you were to have thoughts about you commiting rape on someone else, then maybe you should worry. good luck, dont worry, its normal, i think.
2007-08-05 18:18:11 · answer #6 · answered by amey~leigh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not really. I fantasize about rock stars. and i had a dream once that i was married to one and his other band mate would try to rape me but in the end i would give in. I think if your gonna masturbate it's up to you what you think about while doing it. No one can tell you what's right or wrong as long as you enjoy it.
2007-08-05 15:30:53 · answer #7 · answered by Blazin Gwen Cullen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know? I don't really know if it is considered a "normal" fantasy or not.... I don't think anything - in a moderated degree - can be considered "ab"-normal. But if this really happened to you what would you think? Maybe that is the actual consideration you would perhaps think about. Maybe this is something to bring up with your therapist. What do you think? Or have you ever done that with him/her.
2007-08-04 15:17:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
All I am going to say is that RAPE is a VIOLENT crime. I am sure that you can fantasize about something much more pleasant. Believe me, if you had ever been rapped you would never in your life fantasize about it. I promise. Blessings
2007-08-04 18:54:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as it only remains a fantasy there is no problems, should you try to create this for real there would be a problem
2007-08-04 22:39:07 · answer #10 · answered by cheri h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋