at what age?

Question

My oldest son is 10 and just about to go imto p7 at school. I remember when I was in p7 my mum gave me the talk. I don't want my son to feel that he is the only one in class who doesn't know the facts. I have heard that the school was going to tell them something but I don't know if they have or not cos he hasn't said. I have also heard that the priest is going to start giving sex education to p1 (which I think is totally wrong) what would they know. I also have a boy of 6.

Before we started a family I told my husband that if we had boys he would have to tell then and if we had girls then I would do it. Luckily we have 2 boys so I don't have to do it, but when shoud his mu husband tell him?

Thankyou all for answering my husband spoke to him last night and his reply was"that's disgusting" and he will get the talk when he is in p7

Answer 1

i would say both of you should talk to him now before he gets all the wrong facts from his school m8

Answer 2

As a general rule there is no correct age. When they ask a question, answer it, if they don't understand the answer they will ask another question later. My son could have quite easily told anyone who wanted to know, just about every physical fact of child birth from conception to delivery when he was 6. I think if most parents gave their kids honest, instead of morally guided answers any kid could do the same. He finds it quite amusing to hear the other kids his age (he is now 13) chatting amongst themselves at school in their eagerness to educate each other and some getting it ridiculously wrong or making things up to sound grown up, while others sit silently absorbing every 'fact'. Even he cannot comprehend why anyone would want to hide the information that will determine a child's future, while insisting the same child should be educated in everything else to a greater level than its parents. And no. I have it on good authority that he also understands it's not his job to complete their education in this department any more than it's his job to do their homework for them. But if your not teaching your child. Who is?

Answer 3

sadly kids are growning up much quicker than they used to and parents and teacher hope by informing kids it will help to prevent kids starting sexual activity young, i agree with this as i learned about sex the hard way, when i was 11 i wanted to know what sex was having no idea what it was (silly me) and i had sex with a boy when i was only 11 thankfully i didn't catch anything and didn't get pregnant or anything it put me off sex for a long time but still i always felt i was robbed of my first time and always wished i had been told about sex when i asked instead of finding out that way i regreated it every day of my life and i really think between 10 and 11 is the best time because high school is were all the peer presure really begins, sex talks don't need to be embarresing or horrible you can actaully get good read books on it for kids coming into thier teenage years so might be an idea to look out for them in local store or even on ebay online if ur embarrest yourself

good luck

Answer 4

A lot depends on what you mean by the facts. Generally parents talk to their kids all along about sex education. It makes no sense to sit them down at one certain age and give them all the information you think they need. Everyone is uncomfortable that way. Just talk to your son openly and naturally about topics as they come up. When the two of you see something on TV or in the newspapers, take it as an opportunity to explain and let him know what your family values are.

Answer 5

You should talk to him asap, as i'm sure he knows quite a bit already but won't let on to it, and possibly they are wrong facts which need correcting. If you do it now at least you will know he knows everything and you won't have to worry about certain things that he might have got the wrong end of the stick from. My youngest brother is 11 and recently had the talk in school but it's not very good these days, so they rely on us to give them details and facts. Good luck!

Answer 6

Better your son knows exactly what the story is, so if your husband doesn't want to do it, and you are not keen on the idea, get someone you know and trust, and more importantly, your son can relate to, to talk to him about sex ed.

They say that knowledge is power, and knowledge can also be protection. Candour is often the best way to go with kids. Once they start asking questions, they are ready to hear answers. I think 7 or 8 is usual. Give them age-appropriate answers.

Answer 7

Don't be embarrassed to tell them the facts - there is nothing wrong with sex, it is a natural process. If you find it hard to know where to start then buy a sex education book from www.amazon.com & go through it with them. It is better that they learn the right facts from you & grow up with a healthy sexual attitude. Don't leave it to the school & certainly not to a priest.

Answer 8

Education is the best preventive cure against sexual abuse. Talk to your kids about it. By the way, the schools start sex ed in a very simple way, without gross explanations, as far as I know, they identify the genital area as the area covered by the bathing suit.
In case of a doubt, you can always talk to the person in charge of Sex ed., and make sure the information is according to the kids age.
Good luck...

Answer 9

Hi,
Good luck with that and good to hear you object to a preist giveing advise on sex....i can only im imagine what distorted facts he's get fed! He probably already knows more than you'd like to think anyay!!

10 is a good age to sit him down. Dont be embarrassed about it, you dont want him to think it's a taboo subject, he needs to know it's perfectly normal for mummies and daddies to love each other in a special way! Good luck, my son is only 22 mths and I'm quite lookinmg forward to teaching him about the birda and bees!....but no yet!!

Answer 10

You should be talking to both of them, at different levels of course. Just explain things simply, according to the morals/values of your family. Better they get information from you than the myths on the playground.
And we have a son, but I was the one who gave the talks, with backup from my husband.

Answer 11

my mum never gave me the talk, so sex ed was scary for me, as most people knew something. my daughters nearly 9, she knows little bits about pregnancy, and how it happens. she also knows a little on contraception. i though it might be better to ease her into rather than give her all the facts at once and confuse her.
my son who 7 also know a bit about it too