Reverting to Islam and family will disapprove?

Question

I will soon be converting (or actually reverting) to Islam. My mother disapproves of the entire idea, and she tells me that if do this, I have to keep it secret from the rest of the family because it will upset them (due to their strong Christian backgrounds). However, this bothers me a lot because I never want to deny who I am -- not even for the sake of others.

What can I do? How should I handle this situation?

I already know that, in their minds, Islam is a terrible religion and that all Muslims are terrorists. I'm not sure I will ever be able to change their minds... unfortunately. (I've already tried to a number of times.)

Answer 1

There's a lot of difference between lying and keeping something private. If you don't say anything, your relatives are free to assume what they like. If you speak up, speak honestly. If you don't want to do that (out of respect for your mother's wishes), then learn to say something diplomatic like "My religious beliefs are private."

On the other hand, if what you want to do is declare yourself proudly, you will have to accept that Mother will be angry, will join those who challenge you, and you will have domestic discord. Such is the price of moving from one proselytizing religion to another. Each wants to convert (or revert) the other.

Answer 2

We all must stand before God on the Judgement Day and account for our actions and beliefs...nobody can stand in our place. You must consider that your family no doubt have a lot of preconceived ideas about what Islam is and most definitely what its not. In which case you must be prepared to answer all the questions they have regarding what they see on the tv and what they've heard about it. Doing your homework before those questions get asked will make you confident and assured of your decision. they will see that you have spent time coming to your decision and are well aware of what your committing to.

Also, you might want to prepare the way so to speak. Start practicing some of the visible acts of being muslim...such as abstaining from alcohol, smoking, foul language(not that you do these but you understand what I mean)....possibly bring up the subject of Islam into the conversation and see whats the reaction...see what sort of misgivings or positive remarks they have about it...you might be surprised. if they are as good as Christians as you claim then they will behave and accept your decision....its only the narrowminded folk that cant accept other peoples beliefs and choices....which is very unChristian like behavoir.

At any rate, keeping it a secret might suffice for a period of time but eventually it will come out and you have to decide whether you want that to happen sooner rather than later...its better if your reveal it by your choice and not by some chance remark etc that puts you on the defensive and doesnt prepare you for the conversation(argument/denouncement) that comes next. Your life is yours....the people in your life are temporary...what they believe and feel and expect from you are all temporary and usually self serving...you have decided to worship God and not the whims of people and that is eternal. Good luck.

Answer 3

Firstly, accept my congratulations on making this decision. I hope you find courage to go on and peace in your decision. I guess, your conversion will not remain hidden. The reason is that being a Muslim, when you will follow Islam, many things about you will change. Your habits, your actions, even your appearance probably. So this will become obvious ultimately. A good way to start would be not to create a big dramatic scene but silently start practicing Islam. Slowly, people will observe a change in you and if they ask you then you start drop them hints about your getting inspired by Islam and then ultimately tell them that you have converted.

I have all my prayers for you and great respect for your courageous decision.

Answer 4

First, congratulations on deciding to revert to Islam. Alhamdulillah! I'm very happy for you!

As for your family, the best advice I believe I can give you is that once you revert, stay very strong in faith, keep up regular prayer, stay very active in deeds of charity, continue to study The Deen as often as humanly possible, and, if possible, try to find some way to tell your family members. Always love and care for your family; however, if push comes to shove, you may have to brace being ostracized from them. This may not be the best situation, but for Allah's Sake, but you might have to risk that.

Again, congratulations, and may Almighty God Allah bless you always!

Answer 5

Your religion comes first. In the days of our beloved prophet (PBUH), Muslims were killed just for converting to Islam & yet they were announcing it. If you announcing it does not harm you in a big way (like disowning you or killing or similar things) then you can keep it a secret. As I remember from history books, there was a Muslim man who was living amongst the idol worshippers & did not tell them he was a Muslim because this means that he would be killed and also could not leave Mecca with the Prohet because he had an ill mother who needed care & he was the only one who took care of her. It was ok. So declaring you are a Muslim is much better because they might ask you about it, and when you explain it to them, they might like the religion and read more about it and also convert. But at the end, it's your CHOICE!

Answer 6

Revert to Islam if you truly believe in ALLAH(SWT) and Muhammad(PBUH*). Don't let your family stop you or prevent you from reverting to Islam. My family is the same way. My mother called me a terrorist and an evil evil dog and none of my family appreciates me being a Muslim. I reverted 9 months ago. I'm also married to a Saudi Arabian and they aren't happy about that either. Just remember that you are now on the Straight Path to Jinnah and as long as you follow the rules of Islam then Insha ALLAH you will be in Jinnah when you die. Just remember that as a Muslim woman you can not be alone with a man, you can not have sex before marriage, you have to cover everything except the eyes, you can only marry a Muslim man, and you have to take care of your parents when you reach old age. Also you can not sever ties with your blood relatives.

Answer 7

I'm going thought the same with my parents at the moment, but alhamdulillah I already live away from them. They will come to accept the idea, even though it will hurt them a lot.... and they will hurt you a lot with what they say...
but in the end it will turn out alright, insha'Allah...
Allah is great, and he can do great things...
Show yourparents Islam makes you a better person. Don't argue with them about deen. If you show theù how a good moslem must live, Allah might even find a place to put deen in their hearts, insha'Allah...
anyway, my congratulations for this calling of yours, and send me a message if you wish to talk, depending on where you live we could even talk on the phone if you like...

Assalamu aleikum

Yuna

Answer 8

Changing one's faith will put a great stress on your family. But it is all but expected. Sooner some of them will accept it, others will just ignore it. Nevertheless it is your faith that is important. As long as you are sincere in your heart that islam is the truth, then have faith because Allah will surely easen your path and burden. Remember this hadith from Prophet Muhammad (pbuh):

" Do not do what people want to make them love you but do what Allah wants and He will cause the people to love you."

Answer 9

i was a Christian for 50 years, now Muslim,my fam. do not talk to me, or want any part of me, only my daughter, & son, & that is fine with me, there loss not mine.
if you truly love ALLAH, & the islam way, then go for it sister, do not worrie of what others think.
you need to do, for the sake of ALLAH,
not for the sake of others.
plz do not keep it secret from the rest of the family , or any one else,that would be denieing your fath to ALLAH, & the hole world,
if your fam. realy love you, thay will come to approve of who you are, & what you have become, & stand for.
if you feel the love of islam in your heart, & soul,& know ALLAH Is a true god, & ISLAM is the right way, then stand up sister, & be PROUD!

Answer 10

Hmm... when I was a little girl I was a Muslim. And I love the religion. Some of the teachings I still follow till this day. To tell you the truth Christians are so full of it. Christians are the same people who went to Africa 400 years ago brought Africans back to the America's and told the Africans that there culture and the way they look and speak is not well manner. So making the Africans become Christians was the proper way for them to be. Says who? So please, for my Ancestors dont deny who you are. Christianity is not to be held in a high place. Just keepin it real....