my fiance and me have been together for almost four years and he cheats on me for the third time with the same girl from lasttime, he just left to iraq 1 month ago and i know hes gonna beg me back, i thought he would have changed but i guess i was wrong what should i do?? please help me out and o yea guess what the girl told me he didnt, and let me just add one more thing she might be pregnet!!!!
please help me out
2007-07-28 19:51:33 · 21 answers · asked by lucy s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Can you or do you want to deal with this for the next 50 years of your life? If the answer is no, then I would break off the wedding and deal with the pain now rather than for the rest of your life. In the mean time, work on developing yourself in to the kind of woman a man would never dream of cheating on... then make sure you find the kind of man who wouldn't cheat, even if tempted (they do exact -- they have a lot of integrity and honor)... good luck...
PS. I wouldn't marry him.
2007-07-29 10:15:39 · answer #1 · answered by mj 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You think you're calling off the wedding??? Marriage is the last thing you should be thinking about at this point. He has cheated, and could possibly be fathering a child he made with another woman, and isn't home right now to deal with the mess he created. I'm not sure why you would even consider taking him back even after he begged, or still consider him your fiance. It is time you moved on to someone who will treat you better.
2007-07-28 20:05:57 · answer #2 · answered by ♥Instantkarma♥♫ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is cheating on you before you get married, then he will continue to cheat on you after you are married. He is a coward and wants both his cake and he is eating it to.
He has you, and his other girlfriend and having fun with both of you. Since he is gone back to Iraq, I would have broken it off before he left.
What I would do is put any wedding plans on hold, so that you do not get stuck with the wedding bills. If you have enough time cancel all the arrangements so this way you can get most of your money back with the exception of the small cancellation fee all vendors charge.
Next if the girlfriend is pregnant then, I would definitely break it off. If you are living with him and it is his apartment, I would pack my stuff and move out.
If he can accept telephone calls I would call him and tell him the wedding is off, all plans are canceled and that you moved out.
If he can't then I would do it in writing. I would give the key to his apartment back to his parents if they live in the area.
Just walk away from this situation you deserve better.
Good luck
2007-07-29 01:49:10 · answer #3 · answered by bernie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did you read what you wrote? After reading this I have only one thing to say to you. GO!! get out don't let him come back, he is not going to quit cheating on you. You have basically told him its alright for him to cheat and walk all over you, by taking him back all of these times. And now the "other " girl may be pregnant..wow I can't believe you would still want to stay with someone who is this Inconsiderate, Rude and completely Disrespectful, of you and your feelings. Does your friends and family know about all of this? What do they say??
You can make a clean and free break from him now and move on, start a new life. find someone who wants to be with only you. Do it now before you end up thinking he will change or that marrying him will change him. Do it before you get pregnant by him and have to deal with him and his cheating on top of everything else. Break off the engagement and start over WITHOUT HIM!!
Good Luck
2007-07-28 20:06:12 · answer #4 · answered by tricia123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leopards can't change their spots. Don't get involved with this mess. He's a sicko. Life is too short for you to be treated like crap. Break off the wedding, start over, don't look back. He will break your heart over and over. It'll hurt at first but time heals all wounds. We teach people how to treat us. Forgiving him another time is giving him the idea that what he did wasn't so bad. Those that love you will let you know by showing you.
2007-07-28 20:11:14 · answer #5 · answered by Daya81 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
plz do not get married that will be a mistake getting married wont make things any better he is not ready for marriage youve given him too many chances and he will keep doing the same thing if you take him back and marry him its not easy leavin someone youve been with for so long but u need to let him go you deserve better let him be with that other girl who might be pregnant and she soon of a later will find out what goes around comes around you see he hasnt changed he wont he figures he can do you however and youll still take him back no matter what you dont need that drama squash it good luck!
2007-07-28 20:09:47 · answer #6 · answered by goddess queen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a little more then pre wedding jitters. you are right to feel you should break off the wedding. just because he is a good person (going to iraq) doesn't mean he will be a good husband, and like they always say, once a cheater always a cheater. you don't want to turn into yet anther divorce statistic. a marriage is permanent and it doesn't sound like a relationship with plenty of understandable distrust and a fair amount of dishonesty is something that is going to be permanent. personally, i would say you should call it off, and don't let him woo you into taking him back.
2007-07-28 20:01:46 · answer #7 · answered by dreycraft 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have given him 3 chances, and he has shown he is not worthy of your love and trust. This is not the way to live your life. A friend of mine was married to a cheater, and though she was a married woman, she ended up with herpes becasue of some other woman...now she'll carry this with her for the rest of her life. Don't wait for a tragedy to care fro yourself...four years is a long time, but how long is the rest of your entire life? Hopefully alot more than 4 years. Spend your life in happiness, not worry about his infidelities.
2007-07-29 01:50:40 · answer #8 · answered by melouofs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do you like about this guy? You don't need him. Everytime you take him back, he doesn't learn his lesson. He thinks "she'll always accept me back". Once a cheater, always a cheater.
You've been with him for almost 4 years... 4 years of your life living for him and he doesn't respect you enough to stay faithful?
It's been a long time since you've dated other men, but you deserve better. Don't let this jerk run your life.
2007-07-28 20:05:01 · answer #9 · answered by uneek_sweethart 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should check with him in case she's lying? But if he's cheating on you before the wedding, he'll do it later, too. Better to break it off now.
2007-07-28 21:06:36 · answer #10 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋