Recent college graduate that needs some advice!?

Question

Heres the deal and the simplest way I can put it. I recent graduated from college in May and moved back home because I dont have enought money to afford living expenses. My parents helped me out by paying for college and my apartment. Once I moved back home I had the intentions to find a job and save money so that I could move out and get a dog. Well I havent found a job yet and am feeling lots of pressure from my parents to find a job. I understand that they wake up really early to go to work and I dont do anything. Anyways I will pursue leads and get an interview and then lose intersted and not do anything for a week and then start again. To be honest I dont even exactly know what I want to do and have a feeling I will jump on any job that comes along. I feel like I owe my parents something for like everything they have done for me and I dont want to let them down, but I want to do my own thing and I dont know how it will work if I keep living here. So frustrated....

I can add some details, yes I meant dog. I want to get a dog and see how that works and then maybe find a girl. Next, its not like I havent worked. My last job I got fired from. I think im setting my standards to high, but I did talk with a temp agency looking for jobs and was like thrown into an interview within a day and the company was ready to train me that next week. Didnt like the temp agency or the company I interviewed.

Ya I seemed to be really focused in school. Didnt party much or do drugs. DIdnt meet a whole lot of people either. I seemed to change transistioning from hs to college. I turned into more of a loner and in a way it didnt bother me. I guess there was just to much drama in high school and I didnt want that anymore so I disconnected.

I dont have health insurance yet so it would be my parents insurance paying for whatever they prescribe. Second I dont know how to talk to my parents about that because they will get flustered with the additional bills. Third they will tell me to go to church more. I need to get a dog.

Here are the job categories and orders of them:
Retail-hated the hours, hated my life
Retail/Sales-more freedom but was eventually fired
Retail-Lasted at this job a long time before I quit
Sales-Got fired within 1 month
Telemarketing-Quality of the job was terrible and pay was bad

I read everyones input and thank you. A nice variety of answers.

Answer 1

Get a job in the field your degree is in...if possible. If not find something close to it just to get an opportunity. You can't "do your own thing" if you don't have a place to do it, and to get a place you need a job. Contact employment services in your area. Once you get a job and become independent, you will gain self esteem...this will help you and will be thanking your parents for their support

Answer 2

Finding the job you want let, alone one you are prepared to do is never easy - nor is living with your folks after you have been away from home already and had a taste of freedom.

You say that you are losing interest in your search on a weekly basis and that may be because you are either not finding the jobs you want to apply for or you are getting rejections. Both situations are demoralising and compounding each other.

First of all , if you feel that you owe your parents you should utilise some of you time at home to help them out by picking up the jobs they have not done like say the washing, shopping, cooking ironing and give say three hours a day of your time to these taks so that they feel and value your input into the home and appreciate you being there.

Next you need to set up a job hunt strategy and perhaps consider applying for jobs that are completely different from the area that you studied in. And, ideally, one that provides you with accomodation. Cruise ships for example pay quite well, you get to see some of the world and you have a home and food provided. It would give you the opportunity to save some money at the same time and look at other jobs in the industry and give you a great working start to your CV showing that you have the indpendence.

Alternatively approach the companies you want to work for and offer your services free for a month - perhaps ask them to pay you a travel allowance for bus/train fares or petrol. Once you have your foot in the door offers will start to come your way and they may even keep you on.

Getting you first job is a bit of a lottery but dont be disheartend something will come along soon and as soon as you start that job begin looking for the next! I have always done this and it has given me the opportunity to live in South Africa, Hong Kong, Singapore, and the USA.

Set yourself and action plan and stick to it - say 5 applications a day - even if you dont want the job if you get an interview it is good experience and practice for the all important interview for the job you really want.

Finally I would not suggest you get a dog as the last thing you need is something that restricts you at this time in your life when you need to be open to say YES to any offers that come your way. Good luck in your search!

Answer 3

I don't know where you live or what kind of a degree you have, but I have a few suggestions (some stupid):

Become a street person so you can get out of your parents' house.

Troll the web EVERY DAY for new job listings. Sending out mass resumes on the web is useless. Send it, follow up, find the hiring party and keep on it.

Find a headhunter. They'll charge you, but you'll have a job and a dog.

Go back to school.

Are your parents doing something you can help them with, like running a restaurant or a store? Help them out until you find a job.

Contact your favorite profs and see if they have any leads.

Doesn't your school have a job placement service? Check it out.

Sit on the couch, lose your skills, get fat and stupid.

Make a decision--step one way or another--and see if it's the right decision for you. You may have to try it out before you know what you want to do with your life. If you hate it, try something else.

Write a book.

Best wishes!

TX mom
debbie
not a professional anything

Oh, and P.S. What I always tell the kids on summer break. #1 Work out. No matter what happens, you're going to look nicer and feel better. #2 Learn to cook. People are magnetically drawn to those of us who can cook. Even your mom would like that, I bet.

Answer 4

That's a tough spot to be in. I have found, when I am looking for a job, that it is helpful to get your name out to as many people/potential employers as possible. I call it "carpet bombing" the resume out there. It helps keep momentum on your job search, even if you talk to a bunch of people you don't end up being interested in. You might also find something that you didn't think you would like.

I am not sure what you majored in or what type of job you're looking for, but if there is a professional organization that supports your field they often have job leads and contact/networking help. You could leverage that as a service if it's available to you.

Lastly, have you considered hooking up with a temp service? Again, I am not sure what your line of work is, but temp work gets you a paycheck that can pay the bills, and it gets you out of the house and in to an office where you can meet more people that may be able to point you in the right direction.

Answer 5

In addition to what everyone else said, you also sound depressed. Some people battle depression their whole lives, but some people go through phases where it's a problem, and that's how you sound to me. I have mild depression and anxiety, and before I began meds, I was exactly like you when it came to motivating myself. I didn't recognize it as depression, because I wasn't sad, didn't want to kill myself, and didn't cry all of the time. I simply had no motivation whatsoever, and couldn't bring myself to finish anything. I take Paxil now, and I've gotten much better; in fact, I recently began college at the age of 35, because I finally feel ready to tackle something so difficult.

You are obviously a hard worker if you managed to get your degree, but you seem to be in a pretty bad funk right now. Talk to your doctor and see if a low dose of antidepressents or antianxiety medication would be right for you; you may be amazed at the difference it makes. You might also consider going back for your Masters if it's not being in school anymore that's got you down. I hope this helps, and good luck!

Answer 6

I was in your situation 10 years ago. Here is what happened. I got a job that had nothing to do with my field and paid crap. But it helped me realize that I needed to do something to turn my life around. So I ended up going back to school for another 2 years and working 2nd shift. After I got my 2nd diploma, I finally landed a job that I wanted. After 7 years of that, I now know that I don't want to work in this field anymore. What am I trying to say here?

Things change. Just get out there and start working. You can't wait for all the puzzles to fit right.

Answer 7

My advice--Get a job! Even a fast food job is better than nothing, once in that job you may be motivated to look at bigger and better jobs. Oh, BTW, was that a Freudian slip when you said get a dog instead of a job? You said you wanted to save money to move out and get a dog. Explain that one, OK?

You certainly, DON'T need a dog, you need to get off you A** and get a job or go to the doctor and get some help for your depression. You also need Mom or Dad to get on you A** about getting a job! They need to pull the plug on your cushy life living under their roof and eating their food.

Go see a military recruiter and get some information about a military career, that'll get you off you lazy A**. A drill Sargent is not gonna let you lie in bed and say "I just don't feel like it today". He'll kicked your lazy A** as hard as to make your B**** come out through your nose.

You just cannot just live under Mom and
Dad's roof and "do your own thing".

Answer 8

The phase you are passing through is natural but with a little push you can certainly come out of it. It appears that you expected a red carpet waiting for you after coming out of college. It is natural but sometimes the economic situation casts a temporary pall. The bright side is that you earnestly desire to repay your parents. You talk about interviews you had. Unless they drew a blank you respond to the offiers, if any, however marginal they may be. You can then think of going up from there. As it is you are hesiating on the first step.Take courage and begin to ascend and before long you will find that you have walked up to the top. Best of luck, my child.

Answer 9

Your parents sound amazing. that happened to my older brother and they just got sick of him and threw him out, so you are lucky. I really think you should tell your parents this, tell them how much you appreciate them for everything they do. Tell them that you are stuck and want to get a job but don't know which direction to go. They seem to really care about you and have no problem with helping you out, so i'm sure that they wouldn't mind helping you find the right job and how to go about getting it. we all get stuck and sometimes we can't do it all by ourselves, its ok to ask for help from people you love because they understand. Good luck, i hope it all works out.

p.s. dogs are awesome! :)

Answer 10

about one year before you graduated you should have started your job search. it sounds like you are just going to be a parasite living off your parents until they can't stand you anymore and throw you out on the street. they don't deserve that from you. you know you need to do. get a part time job immediately and then a full time job very quickly. you are really careless to even mention getting a dam dog when you can't even provide for your own survival needs.